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Chapter 50

“Honey, I’m ho-ome!” Claire sang as she walked into the house after work.

She wasn’t expecting an answer; she wasn’t even expecting Nick to be home. So it surprised her when she heard his voice floating downstairs, “Honey, I’m up he-ere!”

Smiling, she dropped her purse and the bag of groceries she’d picked up at the store and sprinted up the stairs to the master bedroom, where she found him sitting on the bed amid a pile of rumpled t-shirts, folding them neatly and piling them into his open suitcase, one by one. “Hey,” she said as she came into the room and glanced into the suitcase. Nick wasn’t the neatest person, especially when it came to keeping his clothes organized inside his huge closet, but the guy could pack a bag surprisingly well. Years of practice, she supposed. “I figured you’d be hanging out at the hospital with Casey.”

“Already did,” replied Nick, dropping another folded t-shirt into his suitcase. “I went up late this morning and stayed for a couple hours.”

“How’s he doing?” asked Claire and listened while Nick filled her in on his visit with Casey. She was relieved to hear he was doing better and decided she’d stop by for a nice long visit tomorrow after work, if he was feeling up to it. With everything that had been going on, she hadn’t been to see him since Friday, and he’d been pretty out of it then.

“So, how was work?” Nick asked as he kept packing.

“Eh, same old. Oh, we got invitations for our staff Halloween party,” Claire said with a smirk. Dr. Somers and his wife always held a costume party for the staff the weekend before Halloween. She’d gone to it in past years, even making an appearance at the one two years ago – she’d come as a doctor so that the surgical mask she had to wear to protect her from germs would look like just a part of her costume. Last year she hadn’t gone because Tim had wanted her to dress up as a swan (she’d ended up in Georgia with Nick instead), and this year wasn’t looking too promising either. The thought of going to that party alone when everyone else would be there with their husbands and boyfriends was just sort of depressing.

“Staff Halloween party, huh?” Nick chuckled. “Sounds like a blast. Maybe you could all go as dentists. Or teeth.”

“I’ll probably go as a canker sore,” Claire joked. “If I go at all.”

“You should come to Cali for Halloween. I’ll find us a rocking party to go to, and I guarantee it’ll be better than some dentist costume party.”

Claire couldn’t tell if he was being serious or not, but she played along. “Only if we dress up. I didn’t get to dress up last year.”

“Oh yeah?” Nick raised an eyebrow. “What would you wanna dress up as?” he asked warily.

Amused at the fact that he seemed to be taking her seriously, she thought quickly, trying to come up with the most ridiculous costume theme ever, something he’d never go along with. “Hm… how about… ooh, I know! Peter Pan! Peter Pan and Tinkerbelle!” she chirped brightly, making her eyes widen with excitement.

If only she’d had a camera ready at that moment – the look on Nick’s face was priceless. He half-gaped, half-glared at her incredulously, as if it to say, ‘Are you kidding me?’

She was, of course, but she wasn’t about to let him know that and spoil her fun. “I’ll get myself some fairy wings and a cute little green dress and go as Tinkerbell,” she went on, arching her back and shaking her ass a little, “and you can be Peter Pan!”

“One-legged Peter Pan; that’ll be nice,” Nick said flatly, looking thoroughly annoyed.

“Don’t be silly; you’ll be adorable! We’ll get you some green spandex,” she said, slapping his thigh lightly, “and a cute little hat with a feather-“ She paused to ruffle his hair. “-and maybe we can even find you a panpipe to carry! Wouldn’t that be sweet?”

Nick gave her a very forced smile. “Claire, darling… if you want to get yourself a little green dress and strut your stuff as Tinkerbell, that would be more than fine with me. But as far as me dressing up like Peter Pan? Hell no! No fucking way.”

Claire couldn’t hold it back any longer; she burst out laughing. “I’m kidding!” she exclaimed breathlessly. “Did you really think I’d try to make you dress up like Peter Pan? Or even worse, did you think I would really cram my ass into a green miniskirt and go out in public?”

Nick smiled weakly, looking utterly relieved. “No… thank God!” he sighed, then added quickly, “Not about you in a miniskirt! Just about me in green tights.”

Claire smirked. “Don’t worry. No Peter Pan and Tinkerbell. Are you serious about Halloween though?”

“What about it? You coming to LA? Damn straight I’m serious. Will you come?”

Claire thought out loud. “Halloween’s a Monday, isn’t it? Three weeks from today… I could try to get that Monday and Tuesday off from work… fly out for a long weekend and come back Tuesday…”

“Yeah!” Nick urged, his eyes brightening. “That sounds perfect. Whaddya say?”

Claire smiled. “I’ll talk to Dr. Somers tomorrow and see, okay?”

Nick grinned back. “Awesome. I’m dead serious – I’ll take you to a real party, and we’ll have a blast, okay?”

“Sounds good,” said Claire, “but make sure it’s a costume-only party. Cause now I’m being serious too – we gotta dress up!”

Nick didn’t look quite as enthused about that, but he nodded anyway. “Okay. Costume party it is. As long as I don’t have to wear tights, I’m in.”

“Don’t worry,” Claire promised, leaning in for a quick kiss, “I won’t make you wear tights.”

***

Leaving Nick to finish packing, Claire wandered back downstairs awhile later and carried her groceries into the kitchen. She wanted Nick’s last night in town to be special, so she’d decided to cook a real dinner – it wasn’t something she did often, for cooking was not her forte. She could prepare simple dishes, enough to live on, but she wanted to make him a real meal, something special. She’d decided on lasagna – with extra cheese, of course, because that was how he liked it. She’d gotten her grandmother’s recipe and figured if hers turned out half as good as her grandma’s, she could call it a success.

Unpacking her groceries, she quickly set to work, cooking the noodles, browning the ground beef. She was just adding spaghetti sauce and seasonings when Nick wandered in.

“Whatcha cookin’?”

Claire turned around, her back to the stove. “You’ll see,” she said with a smile and a wink, shooing him away with her hand. “Go away; I’ll call you when it’s ready.”

“How long will that be? I’m starving,” complained Nick, rubbing his stomach and giving her plaintive looks.

She shook her head, smiling; he was just like a little kid. “I dunno, probably another forty-five minutes. Get a snack if you’re hungry. Don’t ruin your appetite though, cause this is going to be amazing,” she exaggerated with a grin.

Nick raised one eyebrow cartoonishly and stuck his tongue out at her, leaving the kitchen with a crinkled bag of Cheetos in hand.

When she had the lasagna in the oven, Claire went upstairs to their bedroom. The clothes that had been strewn across the bed earlier were gone now, and Nick’s suitcase was fastened and standing neatly in one corner of the room with a few smaller bags, out of the way. A lump rose in Claire’s throat at the sight of the luggage, but she forcefully swallowed it away and strode to the closet. She debated putting on something nice-looking, but, after spotting her favorite sweatpants on the floor, decided against it. She pulled on the sweats and a tank top, tossed her work scrubs into the laundry hamper, and trotted back downstairs to check on their dinner.

Nothing was burning yet, so she wandered on into the living room, where she found Nick sprawled across the couch, one hand crammed inside his Cheetos bag, the other holding the remote. “Do you miss this when you’re traveling and working?” Claire asked with a laugh, dropping into one of the chairs and bringing her legs up in front of her. “Just stuff like vegging in front of the TV?”

Nick grinned, orange powder staining his front teeth. “I used to… but if I ever bitch to you about having to work too hard and missing my TV, feel free to slap me. I’m sick of just laying around and watching TV; I’ve had enough of that shit in the last year and a half.”

Claire smiled knowingly and nodded. It was obvious that he was just itching to get back to his work, his music. And as much as she was going to hate being here without him, she was happy for him. He needed this.

“So whatcha doin’? Is dinner ready?” asked Nick, looking hopeful.

“I told you, forty-five minutes. It’s been like… fifteen, if even that,” Claire answered, laughing.

“Then come sit with me,” said Nick, sitting up straighter and scooting to one side of the couch. Claire obediently slid out of her chair and plopped down next to him, moving the bag of Cheetos out of the way so she could curl up at his side. “So, are you gonna miss me?” asked Nick, licking the powered cheese off his fingers before loosely draping his arm around her.

She looked up at him, meeting his eyes. “Of course I am,” she replied sincerely.

“I’m gonna miss you too.”

“I know that.”

“I wish you were coming with me…”

Claire sighed and shook her head, looking away. “Nick… please. Don’t make this any harder than it’s already going to be,” she pleaded softly. “I’m going to be lucky if I even get to come for Halloween.” Determined to change the subject before an argument arose out of their very different careers, she went on, “Besides, I’m sure you’ll be really busy; you wouldn’t have down time to spend with me even if I was there. And I’ll have plenty to keep me busy here. Don’t forget we have a wedding to plan.”

“You still getting together with your mom this weekend to talk about wedding stuff?”

“Yep,” answered Claire with a smile. She couldn’t believe they’d been engaged for three months already; the time had flown. But she had decided that now would be the perfect time to really get moving on the wedding planning. It was going to be a lot of work, but she welcomed it – it would be something to occupy her free time and fill the void after Nick left.

“Cool,” murmured Nick, and she felt his arm tighten around her. Lowering her head to his shoulder, she relaxed against him for a few minutes, feeling totally content for the first time all day.

He loves me, she thought, smiling again to herself. Even when he didn’t tell her, she could see it. It was in his eyes when he looked at her. Never could she remember any man looking at her like that, and never did she tire of it. When the moment was right, it still gave her chills… those eyes of his - full of blue, full of love. Even when he messed up, it was hard not to forgive him when he looked at her like that.

As they sat in tranquil silence, Claire’s senses picked up the aroma of her baking lasagna wafting from the kitchen. Pleased to find that it actually smelled good, she murmured, “I’ll be right back,” and rose from the couch to go check the oven again.

Twenty minutes later, she was slicing hot garlic bread while Nick loaded a generous helping of lasagna onto his plate. Tucking a slice of garlic bread alongside the piece of lasagna on his plate, Claire sat down across from him and filled her own plate. “How is it?” she asked nervously as Nick stuffed a forkful into his mouth.

Swallowing thickly, Nick gave her the double thumbs up. “Excellent,” he said, wiping a speck of sauce from the corner of his mouth with a finger.

“Are you being serious?” Claire asked, delighted.

“Dead serious; it’s awesome,” replied Nick, cutting off another bite.

Relieved, Claire dug into her own piece and gave it a taste. She didn’t think it was quite as “awesome” as he did – the noodles were sort of undercooked and gummy, the sauce was too runny, and the whole thing basically fell apart the moment she cut into it. But for her first attempt, it wasn’t bad, and Nick seemed to enjoy it – he’d polished off two large servings before dinner was over. Realizing he probably didn’t get home cooking like this very often, she decided she ought to get a hold of some of her grandma’s old cookbooks and practice some more recipes while he was gone.

“So, what now?” she asked as she bent over to load the dishwasher.

“Hm…” Nick murmured as he rose from the table with his plate and silverware. Giving her ass a light swat on his way to the counter, he asked, “You wanna take the boat out?”

“Sure,” replied Claire, adding his dishes to the dishwasher. She loved going out on the boat at night or very early in the morning, when the sun was low in the sky and the temperature still cool. It would probably be downright chilly out there tonight, but she didn’t mind.

Dressed in sweatshirts, they made their way down to the sprawling docks awhile later. The night was cloudless and cool, and once they got away from the lights of the city, Claire knew they’d have a great view of the stars.

She climbed onto the boat and watched as Nick expertly readied it to launch. He loved this boat – going out onto the water in it was not just a hobby for him; it was his way of escaping. She smiled as she heard him start to hum to himself as he worked, but all at once, his voice sprang into her memory, drowning out the quiet humming. “Claire doesn’t like to hang out with me. She won’t invite me out with her friends. Instead she stands me up at the hospital, and she goes out boating, my favorite activity. Right Claire?”

Claire’s stomach jolted, and she swallowed hard. “Hey, Nick?” she called timidly.

Nick quit humming and looked over. “Yeah?”

“I’m really sorry for not inviting you to go water-skiing on Saturday.”

Nick gave her a funny look. “Why are you saying that now?” he asked after a pause.

Claire shrugged apologetically. “I just thought of it… you said something on the phone to me that night, and it made me realize I should have waited to see if you wanted to go with us that day. I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to make you feel left out.”

Nick hesitated again, cocking his head to the side and narrowing his eyes, as if thinking carefully. Probably wondering what the heck he said to me that night, Claire thought in amusement.

“It’s okay,” he said finally, shrugging. “Whatever, I’m over it now. They’re your friends anyway.”

It doesn’t have to be that way, she thought, but she kept her mouth shut. After the past weekend, she’d finally come to the conclusion that the ‘Any friend of Claire’s is a friend of mine’ principle was not going to apply between Nick, Jamie, and Dianna anytime soon. It was time to give it a rest.

It was quite dark by the time Nick guided the boat away from the coast, and as they got further out into the water, it grew darker and colder. Feeling the chill seep through her sweatshirt, Claire hugged her arms to her chest and shivered for a few minutes before finally reaching for the blanket she’d wisely brought along. She unfolded the large blanket and wrapped it around her like a cocoon, feeling warmer almost instantly.

When they were a few miles out, Nick killed the engine and came to join her, letting the boat drift. Claire loosened the blanket from around her body and held one end out towards him, allowing him to snuggle in next to her and pull the blanket around them both. Sliding down in her seat, she leaned against his warm body, resting her head against his chest. She felt his hand come down to stroke her head, his fingers lightly playing with her hair, and she smiled, her cheek brushing against the soft, cozy material of his sweatshirt. She breathed in deeply, his soothingly familiar scent filling her nostrils, and exhaled with a relaxed sigh. His chest swelled and contracted beneath her cheek as he did the same, and the whoosh of breath in his lungs momentarily crescendoed over the slow, steady cadence of his heart in her ear.

For a long time, neither of them spoke, but the silence seemed anything but awkward. To Claire, it was peaceful. Conversation was not needed as the two of them sat nestled together inside the blanket, feeling the boat rock gently underneath their feet, gazing up at the starry night sky, listening to each other’s relaxed breathing and the lap of the water against the boat’s hull.

For a moment, Claire held her breath and wished that time could stand still, stretching the perfect evening into an endless night. She felt she could stay this way forever. But Nick’s heart drummed on in her ear like the tick of a clock, reminding her that they didn’t have forever; they only had tonight. She breathed again, a rush of cool air expanding her lungs. Seconds later, she released it with a sigh.


I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way
I watch the sunlight dance across your face
And I’ve never been this swept away

All my thoughts just seem to settle on the breeze
When I’m lying wrapped up in your arms
The whole world just fades away
The only thing I hear
Is the beating of your heart

And I can feel your breathe, just watching over me
And suddenly I’m melting into you
There’s nothing left to prove, baby all we need is just to be
Caught up in the touch, a slow and steady rush
And baby, isn’t that the way that love’s supposed to be
I can feel you breathe
Just breathe…

- “Breathe” by Faith Hill


***