AJ'S POV
"GET UP, YOU ASSHOLE" Kevin shouted, barging into my room, I pulled the covers over my throbbing head, I hadnt had a good evening last night, usually I could get Coke so easily, but first my dealer didnt have any, and I search and searched for some, and when I did eventually find enough for the rush, the cops raided the club and I ended up going home with some blond again, I only got in at 6 am and had crashed, now I was in major need of another shot. I didnt have the energy to get up or even fight with the guys, let alone Kevin.
"Kev, just calm down" Brian said to his cousin, knowing how stressed Kevin was, "AJ, whats wrong man, look at this place" Howie replied disappointed in his best friend, they were all starting to get worried about his health. "Maybe we should postpone the tour dates and take a few weeks off," Nick suggested, Everyone just starred at him, "ARE YOU SERIOUS" Kevin asked his face going red again, Nick backed up a bit, and threw his hands up in surrender, "just a thought" he murmed, Brian and Howie looked at each other, "Woah .... Kev" Howie said, "Nicks got a point, we all need a break, i'm sure the fans will understand" Brian added, Kevin sighed, knowing he had no choice, "Whatever" he said, walking out the room.
***A FEW HOURS LATER***
I climbed off plane and headed into the airport, my mom had insisted on meeting me there, I kept telling her I'd be fine, but she could be just so stubon, guess thats where I got it from.
"Alex" I heard someone shout, I smiled as I saw my mom running towards me,
"Hey mom" I said as I hugged her,
"look at you ... you've lost so much weight, are you okay?" she asked worridly, I sighed and rolled my eyes, trust my mom to notice things like that I thought as I picked up my bags and headed to the car.
"The guys say you're not feeling very well lately .... So I was hoping you'd stay with me for a few days" she said nervously, as I groaned,
"fine ...... whatever" I replied turning up the radio, I could hear my mom sigh, but just ignored her.
After what seemed like forever (which was actually only about 10 mins) we pulled up into my mom's house, I took my bags up to the room, and settled in, before pulling out a cigirette.
"Alex, if you going to smoke that please go outside" my mom said sternly, standing by the open door, I got up and went outside, after a few puffs, I noticed movement in the house next door, I smiled slightly remembering when Maggie and her family lived there,
"Hello Alex" I heard someone say and turned to see Debra; Maggies mom standing there smiling at me, I smiled and gave her a quick hug,
"Hey Mrs. J" I replied friendly, We stood there talking, for a while,
"Mom, I'm going to the beach" a young girl said as she slowly walked up to Debra, she looked so sick, then she stopped and starred at me, I couldnt belive Maggie .... My Maggie was standing there a few feet away from me, our eyes locked for just a few seconds before I looked away,
"Well I got to go, nice seeing you again" I said to Mrs J then turned and went inside, I coudnt belive it, Why didnt you say hello to Maggie I asked, kicking myself.
"MOM" I shouted walking into the house, "You never told me that Maggie moved back" I shouted, I was angry ... I dunno why, maybe because I would have had a speach planned out, or somthing, My mom went quiet,
'I'm sorry" she said softly, "I don't know why I never said anything but, I guess I knew what happened the last time you saw each other, and how badly you both got hurt, I just didnt want that to happen" She said, "Um ... Alex, I think there is something else you need to know, I wasnt going to tell you this, but seeing you know she's back .." my mom stuttered, I had never seen her so nervous before, "Well what it is ... tell me" I replied getting annoyed with her, "Alex, she's engaged" When I heard my mom say that last word, everything just went blank, she's getting married ..... to someone else I thought sadly to myself, but the saddness didnt last that long, if very quickly turned into anger. Why was she back here anyway? probably wanting to throw it in my face that I've lost her, well I'll just show her, that I'm over her and never been happier. I thought to myself as I jumped into my brand new Corvet and sped off to the nearst pub, I needed to have a drink.
****AT THE BEACH PARTY****
"MAGGIE" BJ squealed as she ran up to her best friend, "oh my gosh, how have you been?" she asked Maggie excitedly, "I'm good, and you?" Maggie asked BJ, as she gave her best friend a hug, "I'm awsome" Bj answered,
"NICK, BRI, D, KEV" BJ called excitedly, Maggie just laughed at her friend,
"Maggie" Nick whispered, just starring at her, "In the flesh" she joked pretending to be a model, all the guys just grinned as they took turns pulling her into a bear hug, "We've missed you" Brian said just starring in shock, not quite beliving that she was actually standing there infront of her,
They spent the whole evening just joking around, and catching up on old news that they had missed in each others life, well Maggie knew most of the Carters and Backstreet Boys news, but she just let me tell her, not wanting to ruin the moment, pushing the fears out of her head, that morning Josh and phoned, luckily she never answered, fearing it was him, and he threatend to be back, but she was too scared to tell anyone, execpt her mother and father, but they had promised to keep it a secret.
"AJ really needs you" Kevin said softly, things had gone from playfull to serious very quickly, and Maggie didnt like where this was going,
"No he doesnt" she said sadly, wishing with everything inside her that Kevin was right,
"yeah Mags, you should see him," Nick anwered, the saddness and worrying showing in his baby blue eyes,
"Don't do this" Maggie said, getting upset, she didnt want to talk about AJ, she had enough other problems to worry about,
"how do you know, you havent spoken to him in 6 years" Nick said, getting angry with her,
"he told me not to phone him, so I didnt .... and yeah I saw him this afternoon, he looks fine" she shouted at Nick and walked away,
*****AJ*****
"I'll have another one" I slurred, I didnt know which of the 3 barmans were the real one, "sorry man, but you've had to much already" the barman said to me, I looked at him, "Says who?" I asked, standing up, but the world just spun around, "look man, no trouble" the barman answered lifting his hands in surrender, The bouncer just showed me out, "Fine, I'll find another bar" I shouted to him over my shoulder, there was no way I was finished with drinking, only when Maggies face stopped coming in my mind I would stop drinking.
I decided to try and walk to the next pub, I didnt want to drive, I noticed across the street there was a beach party, and decided to check out the girls, thats when I noticed them .... her, siting on the beach, Nick had his arm around her shoulder, and I got angry again, it was OUR special place .... why was she here with them .... him. I thought angerily. I went to the bar, and paid for a drink, I downed it, before heading in their direction.
I stummbled a few times, then looked again, they were gone, thats when I saw her walking towards me, she looked sad, "AJ" she whispered as she walked into me, I always loved the way she said my name, her voice, so angelic. When I looked up I saw Nick standing behind her, and my mind flashed back to the way he was sitting with his arm wrapped around her shoulder, "your boyfriends calling you" I told her, I saw Nicks mouth drop open, and her face went white, "my .... my ..... boyfriend" she stuttered, "oh sorry, I forgot you got two boyfriends. but i'm not one of them" I said, she looked at me with tears in her eyes, Why are you being such a Ass my mind kept screaming at me, but I had learnt over the last few years to just ignore that voice in my head.
"Excuse me" she whispered as she pushed past me, I saw Nick glarring at me angerly, "AJ, you such a asshole" he exclaimed, and ran after Maggie, I watched her walk away again, for some reason I just couldnt do anything right, when it came to us,
Thats when I decided I had to tell her I loved her, I walked to where the DJ was standing by his mixing table. I told him my plan, and he handed me the microphone,
HELLO EVERYONE I said into it, I just want to say sorry to Maggie, I was a jackass, I don't know why I kept being nasty, but the truth is I should of run after you that day, and I didnt, I'm sorry and I do truely love you I said, she looked up at me with that killer smile of hers and in my drunken stated tried my hardest to sing this song to her.
You said good-bye
I fell apart
I fell from all we had
To I never knew I needed you so bad
You need to let things go
i know you told me so
I've been through hell
to break this spell
why did I ever let you slip away
can't stand another day without you
without the feeling i once knew
I cry silently, I cry inside of me
I cry hoplessly, 'Cause I know i'll never breathe
your love again, I cry 'cause your not here with me
Girl I'm lonely as can be, Cause I know i'll never breathe
your love again,
if you could see me now,
you'll know just how hard i've tried, not
to wonder why, I wish I could belive
in something new, oh somebody please tell
me its not true, (oh girl) i'll never be over you
why did I ever let you slip away
can't stand another day without you
without the feeling I once knew
I cry silently, I cry inside of me
I cry hoplessly, 'Cause I know i'll never breathe
your love again I cry 'cause your not here with me
Girl I'm lonely as can be, I cry hopelessly
'cause know i'll never breathe
your love again,
If I could have you back tomorrow,
If I could lose the pain and sorrow,
I would do, just anything,
to make you see you still love me
ohhhhhh (I cry) 'Cause I know i'll never breathe
your love again
I cry silently, I cry inside of me
I cry hoplessly, 'Cause I know i'll never breathe
your love again I cry 'cause your not here with me
Girl I'm lonely as can be, I cry hopelessly
'cause know i'll never breathe
your love again,
****I cry by Westlife****
Author's Chapter Notes:
Hey everyone,
Thanks for reviewing, things here are a bit busy at the moment, but i'm hoping to have a 2 new chaps up this weekend, well here is chap 4 and 5 enjoy
hugs
Tracy
Thanks for reviewing, things here are a bit busy at the moment, but i'm hoping to have a 2 new chaps up this weekend, well here is chap 4 and 5 enjoy
hugs
Tracy
