I' ve been in this god-forsaken hole for four days. You'd think I would be used to it by now, considering all the hours I have logged in these places, but I'm not. At least not this time. Somewhere between 4:00 and 4:30 AM on Tuesday, Brian, Nick and I were all admitted into the hospital. It was now Saturday afternoon and I was supposed to have gotten discharged yesterday morning. I royally screwed that one up.
Four days and I was ready to get out of here. The place was almost haunting me. Well actually, I can t really count it as four days because I didn't even regain consciousness until late in the day on Wednesday. I think. Everyone was afraid that I had slipped into a coma, but I for one was glad that I didn't wake up until I did. Before I had passed out in that basement I was sure Nick was dead and was afraid that Brian was too. Little did I know that Brian was a little beat up, but mostly okay. Bruised ribs were probably the most serious thing, but they let him out Wednesday afternoon. And Nick, he was okay. But had I woken up after arriving to the hospital, I would have learned that they had almost lost him twice.
Twice.
Once on the way to the hospital and once in surgery. Apparently everyone went through hell for several hours, not knowing if he was going to pull through. That is something I wouldn't have been able to deal with. My emotionally stability was shaky enough as it was. By the time I had woken up, he was out of danger. Now we all just had a long road to recovery.
It was actually thanks to the nightmares that I was still here. That last coma sleep was the last time I knew a good night's sleep. Ever since then I had been having terrifying nightmares. The most common ones were where Marcus was still alive and broke into the hospital. I was forced to watch him kill all my friends, helpless to stop him. Another involved the things that he had planned on doing to me against my will. The last was that he really did kill Nick. The were all recurring and every one woke me up, drenched in sweat, panting and even screaming.
"Lizz! It's me, Kevin! Wake up!"
"Noooooo. Please, Nick! Oh God, please!!!" I screamed, thrashing against the arms that restrained me.
"Lizz! You need to wake up! You're having a nightmare! Nick's fine!" That same distant voice yelled.
"She's going to tear her sutures! Lizz, you ve got to stop thrashing!" Another anxious voice floated around me and another set of hands tried to still my movements.
"Noooo! LET ME GO!" I yelled, my yelling turning into cries of pain when I felt a bunch of popping across my ribs. My eyes flew open at the new sensation, trying to make out the blurry faces that were above me. Kevin was holding my shoulders down while two other nurses were also trying to hold me down. Brian appeared in the doorway looking really worried. I sank back, exhausted and disoriented. When I looked down, I saw blood seeping through my gown and gasped.
"Lizz, you tore your sutures. We re going to give you a sedative to calm you down." One of the nurses said as she quickly stuck the needle in my arm. I couldn't even protest before the sedative knocked me out.
When I woke up from that, I was informed that they had to redo all my sutures and I would be here for another few days. I was not happy. Since then they have been giving me something to sleep, but it didn t keep the nightmares away. It just made it harder to wake up from them.
I wasn't only one having nightmares. Nick and Brian had been having them almost every time they went to sleep too. Ever since my little episode they started giving Nick pills too so he could sleep. I think they were afraid he was going to do the same thing I did.
As soon as I found out that I wouldn't be getting to go home till Monday at the earliest, I started making a concentrated effort to get on my feet as much as I could bear. It hurt like a bitch to walk, but I was never going to get stronger unless I pushed myself. Friday afternoon I took a walk around the floor and that night I took a few more laps. This afternoon Brian and Kevin took me down the little coffee shop. My mocha was the best thing I had tasted in a long time. On the way up there was this little girl in the elevator that about made me cry. She couldn't have been older than 4 or 5 and had a head full of blond curls. As soon as she saw Kevin and Brian, her little brown eyes got so wide and she smiled like it was Christmas. What got me teary was that she didn't ask them for an autograph or to sing or anything, but instead, she sang for them. It was too precious. We talked about her all the way to Nick and I's floor. I was in a considerable amount of pain since this was the most I had exerted myself since I'd been up, but I was enjoying being on my feet too much to say anything. As we got to Nick's room I immediately noticed several nurses in there. Two of them were getting ready to leave, but one of them was making notes in his chart. He looked up at us when we appeared in his doorway and I don't even know if I can describe the look that passed over his face. He was breathing hard and sweat beaded his forehead. The frantic look in his eyes subsided when he saw us and he seemed to fill with relief. He opened his arms and said in a hoarse voice, "group hug, guys."
I exchanged worried glances with Brian before going over and carefully easing myself on the edge of his bed. A moment later we were all wrapped up in a big embrace and the first thing that came to mind was that he had had a nightmare. We finally broke apart and I studied his face. He looked particularly shook up. "What was it about?" I asked softly.
Nick only shook his head.
"Dude, I came back in the room and he was thrashing all over the place. He about busted his sutures." AJ told us, hitching a hip on the other side of the bed.
"Ew, hun, you don't want to end up like me. What happened? Come on, holding it in isn't healthy." I encouraged.
He gave me a pointed look, knowing I was doing just that.
"After it all was over, we held a press conference to tell everyone that I never died and to tell them that it was all over. At the end we decided we were going on vacation to Fiji. Except our plane crashed and we got stranded on some little island. We thought it was deserted, but it was inhabited by a bunch of violent natives." He stopped and took a breath. "They shot Brian with a poison arrow by accident, when they were supposed to hit Lizz and I."
Brian smiled. "A poison arrow?"
"Shuddup, it gets worse. I bargained with the chief to be their slave so they would leave the rest of you alone, but Lizz, you freaked out or something and they made you a slave too."
I snickered, wincing as it pulled the sutures. "Just like me, huh?"
"Shuddup. Anyway, they decided they wanted Kevin as a breeder too, like they wanted Brian for, and he almost got killed on a rope bridge." Nick continued.
"A rope bridge, Nicky? You watching too much Indiana Jones?" Kevin smiled.
"Whoa whoa, wait a second! They wanted Kevin and Brian and not me?!" AJ exclaimed indignantly.
Nick rolled his eyes. "You know, you freaked out about that in the dream too. You are a dumbass, ya know that?"
AJ started to say something back, but Brian beat him to it. "Go on, Nick."
"They made us do all kinds of crap and the chick, Lelani, that was taking care of Brian was a psycho. She had a thing for Brian or something and hated Lizz and I. Right before I woke up, they made us go to an arena. They wanted us to fight a big lizard."
We all sort of cracked up at that. I was picturing a mini godzilla and I figured the rest of the guys were too. Nick glared at us for a minute, before smiling too. "I guess it does seem kind of far-fetched, but it was scary as hell. I sacrificed myself so you guys could escape."
"Like I would let Spike eat you while the rest of us ran to save our hides." I protested.
Nick looked at me and his jaw dropped. "You...you said..."
" What?" I asked anxiously. He looked totally shocked at whatever I just said. "You really think I would let you get eaten?"
"No, no... nevermind. Anyway we managed to escape, but Sp-, the lizard, chewed up my leg so I was holding everyone back. Lizz ran ahead for help and I decided to go back to save you guys."
"Awwww." We all chorused in unison.
"Shuddup. So anyway, they captured me and Lelani made me drink some potion that altered my thinking and it made me think that all you guys were the evil ones." He stopped, not wanting to say anymore.
"You said we were all dead. Did they capture the rest of us too?" Howie asked.
Nick hesitated. "No, I um, I killed you guys. With arrows. The potion started to wear off and I didn't want to do it, but I couldn t stop. The last arrow I shot went through you, Brian, and into Lizz." He finished, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Aww, hun. It s okay, none of it s true. We're all okay." I said softly, wrapping my arms around him.
"Nightmares suck." He mumbled.
I smiled sadly. "Yeah they do."
"Come on Lizzard, time for you to go back to your room. You are ghost-white." Kevin laid a hand on my shoulder.
"I'm fine."
"No you aren't, come on." Kevin said firmly.
"Alright, only if you play me another game of chess." I said, batting my eyelashes.
Kevin sighed. "Again?"
I nodded. "Yup, please?" I pouted.
"Aw, who can resist that?" Nick snickered at me.
"You be quiet." I ordered, smiling. Okay, so I was in a little pain, but it wasn t like it hasn t been worse. At least I would attempt to beat Kevin again. He won most of the time, but I got him sometimes. I blamed my losses on the drugs I was on.
Nick watched Kevin lead Lizz out of his room. Howie decided to join them while AJ went outside for a smoke break, leaving Brian alone with Nick.
"You didn't tear any of them, did you?" Brian asked, gesturing to Nick's sutures.
"Nope, hurts like a bitch though." Nick admitted.
"You want me to get your nurse?" Brian offered.
Nick shook his head. "No, but come 'ere." "There was a part of the dream that I didn't tell everyone else." He said, his voice low.
Brian got up from the chair he was sitting and sat where AJ was sitting before. "What?"
Nick took a deep breath. "I kissed her."
"Who, the native girl? Lilly?"
"No, dumbass. Lizz." Nick watched Brian's face carefully for a reaction.
Brian s eyes grew wide. "You kissed Lizz?"
I popped my head into the room. "Hey, I forgot my sweatshirt and I insisted that I come back and get it." As soon as they saw me, both of them looked up guiltily.
"Uh, hey." Nick said, turning red. Brian was trying to keep from laughing and failing miserably.
"Hey, I heard my name. Were you guys talking about me?" I demanded, pointing my finger at them.
"No uh, we were just saying that you need to get more rest." Nick said smoothly.
"Uh huh. Anyway, I ll be going now. I ll let you back to whatever you were talking about." I smiled wickedly.
They both waved and as I shut the door behind me, I heard Brian start laughing.
"Dammit, Brian, shuddup, that wasn t funny." But Nick was laughing too.
I grinned and shook my head. They worried me sometimes. Another wave of pain coursed through me, reminding me that I was starting to push myself too hard. If I could just get Brian to fess up about what they were talking about...
"Okay, now that she's gone again," I quietly observed once the door closed.
Brian studied my face before he spoke. I kinda in a way hated when he did that, but then again, Brian always knew the right things to say and do under most circumstances. "So this kiss you and Lizz had in the dream, it has you shook up a bit?"
My attention was drawn to the bedspread and I felt the sudden urge or need to smooth it out rather than look back at Brian in the face. Brian's hand came down on one of mine. "Nick?"
"I don't know what I feel right now Brian. I mean I guess I don t know how Lizz would feel ya know? I-I j-just I."
Okay, stammering wasn't good. I always studdered when I got nervous.
"Nick?"
I still wasn't gonna look Brian in the face. "Yeah?"
"Would you look at me, please?"
I hesitated but finally looked over at my best friend sitting on the edge of my bed. I hate to admit it, but sometimes just seeing his face calmed me down when I was upset over something.
"Nick you have to stop thinking here," Brian said as he gestured towards his head. "You have to start thinking here," he then pointed a finger at his heart. "Your heart will guide you in this and your heart can never be wrong."
"But what if--"
"Nick! Listen to me, if it s meant to be it will happen, let your heart guide you."
"Did it with you and Lee?"
No words were spoken at that moment, only a slight smile formed on his lips and a nod of his head.
"Ya know I hate all of this," I mumbled.
"When it's right, you will know it Nick," Brian replied with a smile.
"Judas AJ, that has to be the quickest cigarette you've smoked, ever," I remarked as I cast a glare in his direction.
"What the hell did I do wrong now?" AJ asked Brian.
"Nothing AJ, don't worry about it," Brian reassured.
His tan cowboy boots clicked on the floor in a level, steady beat as he walked across the room, leaving black scuff marks in its trail. He peered out the window. "Beautiful rainy ass day we're having."
"I wouldn't know," I sighed.
"So Nick, do you care to explain why the natives didn't want me as a breeder?"
I rolled my eyes. God, this guy won't leave anything alone. "AJ, good god, it was a dream! Would you let it go?"
"Well there has to be some hidden message in there, ya know they always say that dreams are made up of your subconscious thoughts. My bet is that you feel sexually inferior to me and you held me back in that dream making those barbarians think I was undesireable."
"Seriously AJ," I scoffed.
"Really AJ," Brian joined in, his cheeks were stained with a light blush. "This is really embarrassing."
"Satisfied? You made Brian uncomfortable, dumbass!"
"Brian gets uncomfortable when he farts in his own car by himself," AJ retorted.
"Alright, alright! How about getting something from the cafeteria?" Brian suggested.
"Do you think there would be any possible way for me to go along? I can ask my nurse, I'm so damn sick of laying in this bed," I begged.
"You would have to be in a wheelchair, do you think you could sit up that long? Your chest is still healing," Brian asked.
"Hey, if Lizz can do shit so can I," I defended.
"Okay, I ll go ask, AJ you can come with me, I don t trust the two of you alone together right now," Brian stated.
"Sure thing Dad," AJ saluted.
