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Author's Chapter Notes:
ok, here's the second of my epic chapters. Be looking forward to Sarah's part too! I'm super excited for it!
Chapter Sixteen

AJ McLean had never been exceptionally good at keeping secrets, and the scene he’d witnessed between Mac and Jake was just too big to keep under wraps, so the tension was high the next morning in the parking lot as everyone loaded onto the buses—especially once Brian knew what had happened. He’d heard it from Erica, who heard it from Dan, who overheard AJ giving Nick all the juicy details. He didn’t want to believe it, but it seemed to make so much sense in his eyes, and he couldn’t do anything that morning except watch them say goodbye to each other from a distance.

He cringed when Mac hugged Jake and then walked away with him. He wanted to follow them, because he was desperate to find out if she’d decided to accept his offer, but he couldn’t go anywhere because the minute she was gone, all eyes turned to him. “What?!” he snapped at no one in particular.

He couldn’t help but be cranky. His secret girlfriend – who was apparently afraid to actually put a label on them in secret as well as in public – was saying goodbye to her possible fiancé and probably kissing him at this very moment. But aside from that fact, Brian only managed a couple hours of sleep because he’d decided to do some spontaneous moonlight hero work to take his mind off it all. He was tired, he was worried about Mac, and he wanted to absolutely punch Jake’s lights out.

“Don’t sweat it, Bri, you’re safe.” AJ tried to sound sympathetic through his giggles. “She was pissed as hell last night. My guess is this is not the first time she’s had to say no.”

Brian started to ask why he should care, but Nick jumped right in where AJ left off. “Don’t be an ass, Brian. We all know you’re crazy about her.”

Brian felt his face turn red when basically everyone on the tour nodded his or her approval, and Leigh pushed Nick out of the way, feeling that Brian could use a little more sensitivity at the moment than Nick was capable of. “It’s okay, Brian. We all think it’s wonderful. She’s a great woman, and she obviously makes you happy, so you should go for it.”

“That is, if you haven’t already,” Nick laughed, earning snickers from AJ and Howie as well.

“Oh would you give it a rest already!” Brian exploded. “For the last time, there’s nothing going on between us! You all just need to back off! You don’t have to try to help the poor misguided widower, okay? I don’t want your help! And leave Mac alone, too! If she wants to go off and get married to some jerk-off asshole then that’s her business, and you guys need to stay out of it!”

Brian managed to silence everyone present with his speech, except for Baylee, who gasped as he looked up at his father in utter amazement. “Daddy, you said a bad word.”

Brian shook off his anger and sighed as he knelt down to apologize. “You’re right, Bay, I did, and I’m sorry. Daddy’s just really stressed out right now. But don’t worry, I won’t do it again, I promise.”

As Brian hugged his son, he could feel the burning of an angry gaze on his back. “Brian? Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Brian froze at the harsh tone of Mac’s voice and suddenly realized that only Baylee was worried about his use of the term asshole. The adults were all more concerned with the fact that Mac was standing right behind him when he said it. He grumbled as he got to his feet and found Mac staring at him expectantly. “What?” He shrugged not caring in the least that he had an audience. “I don’t like him.”

“That’s fine. You don’t have to like him, but he means a lot to me, so I expect you to be a good sport.”

“I am being a good sport.”

“Jerk-off, asshole?” Mac questioned.

“Well he is one,” Brian muttered under his breath like a six year old, but decided to defend himself when he saw Mac’s glare. “The guy shows up out of nowhere, acting like he owns you, and watching the rest of us like he’s planning some kind of terrorist attack. I don’t trust him. And I don’t like the way he treats you.”

“Argh! What is it with men?! Why don’t you come talk to me when you’re done acting like a jealous five year old!”

“Hey!” Baylee automatically protested.

“I’m sorry, Baylee, you’re absolutely right. You’re being way more mature than your dad right now.” Mac tousled the kid’s curly mop with a big angry smirk on her face and then turned her attention back to Brian. “And just so you know, he’s meeting us in New Orleans, so you’d better get this little tantrum out of your system quick or find a ride with someone else, because I can’t deal with any more of it.”

With that, Mac stormed off to the bus, leaving Brian to stand there boiling in his own fury. He wasn’t the only one being immature here. None of this would have been a problem if she would just tell people the truth about what was going on between them. Stupid Jake wouldn’t be trying to steal her away, and he wouldn’t have to be jealous. Brian was snapped from his thoughts when Nick threw his arm over his shoulder. “Dude,” he laughed, “I think you just got kicked off your own bus… by the nanny.”

“The hell I did,” Brian grumbled as he shoved Nick off him and stalked off to his bus.


“That’s right Rok, you go show her who’s boss,” AJ called out, wild with laughter.

“And take all the time you need!” Nick added. “I’ll take Baylee with me.”

Brian whirled around to glare at Nick, but Nick just waved him off, already holding Baylee in his arms. “I’m serious,” he laughed. “We’ll see you in New Orleans, man. You go, uh, take care of business.”

Brian was ready to wring Nick’s neck, but, at the same time, he was ready to wring Mac’s more. He knew that was no environment for a child to be in, so he waved them off and then disappeared onto the bus where he found Mac writing furiously in her journal. “Oh, no,” he said, shutting her book. “You are not going to hide behind that stupid diary this time. If you can call me out every time I’m acting like a jerk, then I can too, and you’re being a jerk!”

Mac was on her feet in a second. “Me?!”

“Yes, you! I hate lying to everyone about us. If you treated me half as well as you treat Jake, I wouldn’t have to be jealous. But whenever there’s anyone around I’m not only not with you, I’m just your boss and I mean nothing to you. Not to mention, you practically threw-up when I said the word boyfriend, so excuse me if I get a little grouchy when the guy you named your fish after shows up with a wedding ring.”

“I’m sorry, Brian. It’s not like I knew he was coming!” Mac tried to calm her temper because she knew this was really not any of Brian’s fault. “It’s not that I don’t want to be with you. I do. I’ve just never been good with relationships and this is hard for me.”

“You think it’s easy for me?! It’s been eleven years since I’ve thought about any woman other than Leighanne.” Brian instantly calmed down at the mention of his wife’s name, “Every single time I even look at you I feel like I’m betraying her, and I have to remind myself that she’s gone, and she’s not coming back. I know she would want me to move on, but it hurts all the time.”

Agent Mackenzie Adams of the FBI had never been a weeper, in fact she couldn’t remember the last time she’d physically done it, but she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She’d never thought about it like that before, and, suddenly, every mood swing Brian had ever had since the day she arrived all made perfect sense. Suddenly, her fear of commitment, and her worries about the job getting in the way of anything real seemed like the most insignificant obstacles, and she felt horrible. She felt guilty for being so selfish. She was so sad for the pain he experienced that she would never be able to fully understand, and yet seeing how strong he was made her like him all that much more.

Mac started to tremble ever so slightly, and the feel of the warm moisture that escaped her eyes startled her when it hit her cheeks. She sat down and shamefully hid her tears as she whispered in a shaky voice, “God, Brian, I am so sorry.”

Brian was surprised by the emotions but very relieved to see them as well. He’d yet to see the weaker, more vulnerable side of Mac, and it felt good that he wasn’t the only one who felt that way sometimes. It was for this reason that he knelt down in front of her and chose not to wipe the tears from her face, but rather lift her chin to look into her beautiful glossy eyes. “Don’t be sorry,” he whispered with a sad smile. “As much as it hurts, you’re worth it. When I’m with you, you fill the void that Leighanne left behind. You make me happy, which is something I didn’t know was possible anymore.”

That was the kindest thing any man had ever said to Mac, and it made her heart swell in a way she’d never felt before. She looked into Brian’s eyes, and he could tell that she was extremely overwhelmed. He smiled very sweetly at her and then brushed her bangs behind her ears. “I want to be with you, Mac, but I was in a very serious relationship for over a decade and I’m afraid I don’t really know how to do it any other way. I took a huge step with you, and it scares me to think that some guy who knows everything about you, and obviously means a lot to you, could just swoop in and take you away. I’m sorry if I’ve been jealous, but you’ve got to work with me a little here and at least be honest with me.”

Brian’s request cut through Mac to her very core. Be honest. It was the one thing she couldn’t do. But she understood what he meant by feeling something you didn’t know was possible, and she was every bit as scared of it not being there anymore. “Jake and I have a very complicated relationship,” she began, hoping she could get through it without having to actually make up lies. “I imagine it’s a lot like the relationship you have with the guys; more than a friend, but not quite a brother. I wish I could explain it better, Brian, but I don’t know how. But I promise you, never once, not even for a second, have I thought of him the way I think of you. You have absolutely no reason to be jealous of anybody.”

That was all Brian needed to hear. He looked into Mac’s eyes, and she seemed so scared that he might reject her that he knew she meant every word she said, and he couldn’t help letting his lips fall to hers. It was such a soft, delicate kiss that it almost pained Mac to be in it. Brian brought his hands to either side of her face and clung to her with just the tips of his fingers as if she were a ball of sand that would crumble if he weren’t gentle.

Mac melted at his touch and was completely powerless to do anything but let him make love to her. The first time they’d been together it was purely in the heat of the moment. It was angry and full of passion, but completely derived from pent up frustration and feelings of lust. This time, things were different. They took the time to discover one another and learn what the other felt like. They took the time to love each other.

Never before had Mac been with a man on such a personal, emotional level, and for the first time in her life, those feelings of intimacy didn’t scare her. When he was with her, when he held her, she felt as if nothing on Earth was ever meant to feel more right. She lay there in his arms, clinging to him, practically shivering from the feelings of bliss, and she never wanted to let go.

Brian held her, with the same feelings, but also amazed that he could feel this way about a woman again. Mac was a blessing in his life in so many ways. She was an angel, sent to help the Avenging Angel remember that not everyone in this world was bad, and that saving people wasn’t only about vengeance. It was about the greater good. Mac was the balance he’d been searching for that could keep him in control of his darker alter ego. The only thing he couldn’t figure out was how he got so lucky. “Mac?” he asked, finally breaking the serenity of the afterglow.

“Yeah?”

“What are you doing here?”

His tone had no hint of anger or suspicion, but Mac’s guilt caused her voice to shake as she asked him what he meant. “Well,” Brian tried to ask what he was thinking in a way that wouldn’t upset her, “a woman like you doesn’t just up and leave her life to become a nanny and travel the country with pop stars. You had to have a reason. I don’t mean to say that it’s bad, I’m just trying to understand you. You’re so smart, and beautiful, and strong, and mature. You seem to have it so together, so why all of a sudden abandon your life?”

“Brian,” Mac sighed at a complete loss for words.

“Was it Jake?”

That was the last thing Mac expected to hear, and she couldn’t hide the surprise and confusion in her voice. “What?”

“Did you leave because he asked you to marry him, and you didn’t feel the same way? Is that what you guys fought about last night? It’s the only thing I can think of that makes any sense, and if that’s the case, then wouldn’t it be easier just to tell people about us?”

There it was. There was absolutely no getting around it now. Mac had to give Brian an answer, and there was no way to not lie. Brian seemed to have already created the perfect story in his mind, so she just gave him a sad smile and let him believe what he wanted. She hated doing it, but there was nothing she could do about it. If she blew her cover she would never work for the FBI, or any other government agency, ever again and she was too young to throw away her career.

“I can’t help the things Jake says and does,” Mac finally explained. “He already knows exactly how I feel about being engaged to him. I’ve made it perfectly clear, but now is not the time to lay this kind of news on him. He’s just worried about me. I promise I’ll tell him when the time is right, but for now I just can’t do that to him, especially not after our fight last night. I understand you hate lying to the guys, so do I, but can we please just wait until Jake’s long gone before we tell them? I promise in the meantime I will be the best secret-girlfriend ever.”

“So then you really are okay with being my girlfriend?” Brian asked as he pulled Mac tightly against him again.

“I’m getting used to the idea.”

Mac shuddered at the feel of his arms enclosing around her, and Brian chuckled at her sigh. He couldn’t seem to hold her tight enough. She fit so perfectly in his arms that it almost felt like she was just a part of him. At that moment he was a complete man again. It was such a comforting feeling that Brian couldn’t force his tired body to stay awake any longer, and he drifted off into the best sleep he’d gotten in over a year.

***

Jake wasn’t the only one waiting at the hotel in New Orleans when the buses pulled into the parking lot. Mac noticed the trademark black tinted SUV with government plates long before the police met her in the hotel lobby. Brian was concerned when they towed her off, but, after holding her in his arms for the last five and a half hours, he handed her over to Jake surprisingly easily. His sudden confidence and pleasant attitude sparked Jake’s curiosity to the point of annoyance, and Jake took special notice of the fact that Baylee had not been on the bus with them.

Mac knew what was coming, and yet her excellent mood didn’t turn sour until she climbed into the back of the SUV and saw the anger in her Captain’s eyes for herself. “I can explain.”

“That won’t be necessary, Adams. Your little partner here rolled over like a dog when I asked him about it. Told me everything you’ve been up to.”

Mac frowned at Jake, but he was still angry, and he just glared right back. “It was just a hunch, Captain. I was only doing a little research to see if my theory was correct.”

“You call a concussion and a picture on the front page of every news paper in the nation a little research?”

“A mild concussion,” Mac grumbled. “And the Avenging Angel puts a new face in the headlines every week. I was old news the next day.”

“Damn it, Mac! It was stupid, sloppy, and you could have gotten yourself killed! If you weren’t the best damn agent in my precinct, I’d have you pushing papers behind a desk already! You’re too close to this Avenging Angel business, Adams, and I’m taking you off this case.”

“You can’t do that!”

“I just did.”

“But I’m not even assigned to this case. I’m on vacation remember? A six-month sabbatical that you practically forced me to take.”

“Not anymore. You’ve been reinstated and I’m giving you the Dunbar Case.”

“Dunbar? Are you kidding me?!”

“It’s an important case.”

“The man’s trafficking illegal produce! Imported tomatoes are hardly a threat to society.”

“Well,” Riley smirked, “then there’s not much chance of you hurting yourself, is there?”

Mac was so angry she could barely keep herself from shaking, and, even though Jake was mad at her, he hated to see her taken away from the case. “Be reasonable, Captain,” he pleaded, earning a death look of his own from Riley. “The only reason we have this lead in the first place is because of Mac, and if you pull her out now it will blow my whole case.”

Mac shot Jake a small grateful smile and spoke with her temper finally under control. “Captain,” she pleaded, “no one knows this case like me. I know every single person on that tour.”

“Some more than others,” Jake grumbled under his breath.

If looks alone could kill a man, the icy glare Mac shot him would have been the end of him, but she quickly turned her attention back to her boss. “I’m already on the inside and I’ve narrowed down to twelve people.”

“Eleven,” Jake muttered. “Saunders isn’t your guy.”

“What?” Mac gasped. She’d been so sure. “How do you know?”

“Because I had surveillance on him all night last night after you gave me his name. The guy disappears into dark alleys because he has a crack habit.”

“That doesn’t mean he can’t still be the Avenging Angel.”

Jake frowned in confusion. “Haven’t you seen today’s paper?”

Mac shook her head, and her eyes grew wide when Captain Riley handed her a copy. “Mac, while I was watching the guy get high, the Avenging Angel was sighted four times all over Houston. Including when he stopped an attempted car jacking where there was an infant in the back seat.”

Mac read the article with eager interest and gasped at the frightening details. “The carjacker was hospitalized after the Avenging Angel pulled him from the car and beat him repeatedly with a Billy club. Captain, the guy is clearly crazy.”

“The guy pulled a knife, it was self defense.”

“Not if he was the one who started the assault.”

“Look, Mac, you were right, the guy needs to be stopped, but he’s not worth losing my best agent over. If you want to stay on this case, then no more crap like the stunt you pulled, and Jake is your partner. End of story.”

“Thank you, Cap. I won’t let you down.”

***

Mac felt so much better after her meeting was over that she was nearly giddy. And the best part was, that she’d managed to talk the captain into nixing the idea of bringing Jake under cover with her. After all, he really was more helpful to her leading the team from the outside. It had nothing to do with her new relationship with Brian. At least that’s what she told herself because Agent Adams would never let a relationship get in the way of her job.

Brian had watched Mac climb into the car in the parking lot and kept an eye on it when it didn’t pull away. He was still disappointed that she hadn’t let him come with her, but, after everything she said to him on the bus, he simply couldn’t press the issue. He would have loved to get a glimpse of these FBI agents, and hear what they had to say about the Avenging Angel, but he couldn’t risk raising any suspicions in her, no matter how small. No one could ever know his true identity. No one.

Brian waited around the corner of the hotel nearest to where the car was, hoping he might catch a glimpse of his enemy when Mac’s interview with them was over, but, much to his disappointment, he still only saw Mac and Jake. When they exited the car they both waved as it drove away and watched it until it was out of sight before heading back toward the hotel.

Brian was about to run around back of the hotel to catch them in the lobby as if he hadn’t been waiting impatiently for Mac’s return, but Jake suddenly began dragging Mac his direction, and his curiosity got the better of him. He looked around for a place to hide, and the only thing on the side of the hotel was a large tree. With as much practice as he’d had scaling buildings lately, even without the Avenging Angel’s tool belt, Brian made his way safely into the thick branches with ease. He was completely out of sight by the time Mac and Jake found their way around the corner of the building, ducking cautiously as if they were afraid someone might see them.

Brian was a little worried about why they could possibly be hiding, but he felt a little better when Mac seemed to be wondering the same thing. “What is it now, Jake? I’ve got to get back to Baylee before the guys have to got to the venue.”

“Look,” Jake said trying his best not to sound agitated, though both Brian and Mac could tell he was upset. “Now that everything is settled, there’s just one thing I need to know, and I need you to be completely honest with me.”

Mac frowned, having a pretty good idea of what he was getting at, and Brian watched the two like they were a soap opera unfolding right before his eyes. “What’s going on with you and Brian?”

“Nothing!” Mac snapped. “He’s my boss, that’s it.”

Brian’s heart stung a little to hear her deny her feelings so severely, but his look of disappointment was nothing compared to the anger on Jake’s face. “I saved your ass back there! You owe me the truth.”

“I appreciate you sticking up for me, Jake, but trust me on this, okay? Yeah, I like him, but I know how to do my job. I’m not going to blow this case over some silly crush. I have everything under control.”

“Silly crush? You’re getting in over your head this time, Mac,” Jake said with a sigh, his look becoming sympathetic. “In all the years I’ve known you, I’ve never seen you as attached to anyone as you seem to be with that man and his kid.”

Mac finally blew a hard breath from her lips and shrugged her defeat. “It’s kind of hard not to get attached when I’m spending 24/7 with them,” she admitted and then shrugged again, even more vulnerably. “I’ve never met anyone like him.”

Jake was surprised by the sincere confession, and he managed to give her a smile that was sincere, though full of desperation. “This isn’t Agent Reed talking to his partner anymore. I’m saying this as your friend, Mac. You know I’d love to see you find someone that makes you happy, but he’s not the one. He can’t be, and you know it. Even if you’re right, and Brian has nothing to do with the Avenging Angel, what’s going to happen when we do crack this case and he finds out who you are?”

“I know,” Mac muttered.

As if that weren’t hard enough to think about without Jake saying it out loud? Mac cast her eyes shamefully to the ground and then kicked the tree out of pure frustration. Jake put his hand on her shoulder, and, when he looked into her eyes and saw how upset she was, he pulled her in for a tight hug. “Maybe Riley was right,” Jake said. “Maybe you’re too close to this one. Maybe you should let the Cap reassign you. Or better yet, actually take that vacation you’re supposed to be on right now. Some time away might do you some good.”

Mac pulled herself from Jake’s arms, sucked up her emotions and shook her head with determination. “The Avenging Angel has been my case from day one. No one wants to stop this guy more than me. I have to finish what I started.”

“Okay,” Jake said, glad to see Agent Adams making a comeback. “Then let’s hurry and finish it. The sooner we get you out of here the better.”

Mac nodded, although she didn’t know exactly how much she agreed with his last statement, and the two finally ended their conversation and headed back inside.

Brian watched them go, completely and utterly shocked by this revelation. There was a whirlwind of thoughts in his head, and he felt his hands clench into fists as one thought stood out from the rest. Mac, his Mac, worked undercover for the FBI, and she was out to get him.