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Brian's View

"This is hella good," AJ said as he took another bite of his lasagna. I just nodded with my mouth full.

"Thanks," Kevin said.

"You so did not cook this," Nick said piling some more onto his plate.

"Yes I did!" Kevin said looking over at Nick. Nick just shrugged and licked his lips.

"Who taught you how to cook it then? You didn't learn it over night," AJ said tearing off a piece of bread.

"My Mom," Kevin shrugged. Nick choked on his food and laughed. We all just looked at him.

"What?" he asked looking at all of us. "I thought it was funny."

"Yeah, well at least he learned something from a real person and not some teddy bear," I grinned at him. He just glared at me and snapped, "Shut up!"

"Say what? Damn Nick! Are you THAT desperate?" AJ exclaimed looking over at Nick wide eyed. Nick looked over at him confused and burst out, "Huh? Eww! Not like that man! That's just sick!"

AJ just looked at him weirdly and went back to eating his food. I couldn't help but laugh.

"You guys are some characters all right," Nicole laughed from across the table where she sat in between Howie and Kevin.

"Aren't we though? We're just good like that," Nick said happily. I rolled my eyes and said to Nicole, "You get used to us after a while."

She nodded and took a bite of her salad.

"Do you like it Nikki?" Kevin asked looking over at her. She glanced at him and set down her fork, "Yes, very much so. It's really good."

Kevin smiled and looked at all of us proudly, "Thank you."

"Anyways! Enough about the food, I wanna ask some questions," AJ said setting down his drink and rubbing his hands together. Howie groaned and said, "Can't you give it a rest for once? Leave her at peace."

"Oh no. it's fine! You can ask anything you want," Nicole smiled at Howie and then at AJ. "Go ahead."

"How old are you?" AJ asked leaning forward. I couldn't help but chuckle at his seriousness. No one could. Nicole even laughed.

"What?" he asked looking at all of us.

"Are you worried about jail bate Bone?" I asked. He shot me a look and quickly said, "I just asked how old she was! Nothing wrong with that. It's harmless."

"With you, nothing is harmless," Howie said shaking his head. AJ ignored him and just looked at Nicole. She laughed lightly and said, "I'm 22."

AJ smiled and leaned back in his chair.

"Are you familiar with our music?" Kevin asked pushing his plate forward and folding his arms on the table.

"Of course! I don't live under a rock," she laughed.

"Do you like it?" Howie asked.

"Yeah I do, I'm a real big fan of you guys," she said. We all nodded and smiled.

I rolled my eyes as the phone then started to ring. Right about now I would gladly kill whoever invented the damn thing.

"I'll get it," Kevin said getting up. A few moments later he came in and sat back down.

"Who was it?" AJ asked.

"Kristin, she's having some womanly crisis and 'absolutely needs me there this instant'," he said, mimicking his girlfriend. He then turned to Nicole, "I'm real sorry about this."

Nicole gave him a smile and said, "Don't be sorry. Go fulfull your obligations."

"Thanks, it was real nice meeting you girlie," Kevin said kissing her on the top of her head.

"You too," she said. Kevin got up and looked at all of us.

"Why are you looking at us like that?" Nick asked taking another bite of his bread.

"Go," Kevin said simply.

"Go? Go where? Please be more specific," Nick said.

"Go, now, out!" Kevin said pointing to the door.

"Oh! Sorry Kev," I said as I quickly got up.

"Sometimes ya just gotta be straight forward with these guys," Kevin said to Nicole as she got up out of her chair. She just giggled.

"Yeah, we love you too!" AJ exclaimed as he walked out the door. We all followed and started walking to our cars. Nicole began to head over to Howie's car as I went over to Nick's. I looked after her and on a whim, decided to be bold and take a chance.

"Hey Nicole, wait!" I said jogging up to her. She turned around and looked at me.

"Would you like to go get some ice cream?" I asked stuffing my hands in my pockets. I was praying she wasn't going to turn me down. She smiled and said, "I'd love to."

"Great," I grinned. She turned to Howie and told him she was coming with Nick and I and then walked over to Nick's BMW with me.

"We're gonna go get ice cream?" Nick asked getting in the drivers seat.

"We are, you aren't," I said, grabbing Nick's car keys and opening the door. Nick stuck his tongue out at me and turned around, rushing to catch up with AJ before he drove off. Nicole sat next to me and closed the door.

"Crap," I said. She glanced over at me, "What?"

"I've never driven a stick," I said, but then I shrugged and turned on the car, "We'll see how it goes."

She looked at me a little fearfully, "Really?"

I laughed, "I'm just kidding."

She could only smile her beautiful smile back.

15 Minutes Later

"Thank you," I said to the lady behind the counter as she gently handed me my Oreo Blizzard. I then walked out of Dairy Queen and over to Nicole who was waiting for me on the sidewalk.

"Thank you for buying me ice cream Brian," she said, taking a bite of her ice cream. I smiled at her and said, "You're so very welcome. Do you want to walk around a bit or should I just take you back to your apartment?"

"Could we walk? It's really nice out and I wouldn't mind talking some more," she said looking at me.

"Yeah, come on," I motioned for her to follow me. She fell into step next to me and for a few minutes we just walked in silence before she broke it.

"How's life?" she asked looking over at me. I glanced at her and shrugged.

"It's alright I guess, how about you?"

She grew quiet for a moment and then said, "How my life is isn't that important."

I looked at her strangely and said, "Why would you say that? Your life is important."

She smiled at me and said, "I was only joking. Ya gotta loosen up and not take things so seriously."

"Sorry, I didn't think you were kidding," I said quietly.

"You're really nice Brian," she said. I looked up at her and slowed my pace down.

"Thank you."

"No need to thank me. I'm only telling the truth," she shrugged. After she said that, we both grew quiet again. The breeze hit our faces and the leaves rustled above us.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" I blurted out all of a sudden. She looked over at me slightly startled but then her lips formed into a small smile. She just shook her head.

"Why not?" I asked. You would think a girl like this would definitely have a boyfriend.

"Never had the chance to have one," she said simply.

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"I'm a busy girl," she shrugged.

"You're saying you have never had a boyfriend?"

"Oh no, not never, but I haven't for a little while," she said.

"Oh, sorry to hear that."

"Nah, it's really OK. Being single isn't all that bad."

"How so?"

"Well, I mean some people really hate being single. I don't see why. Most of the time in relationships you're gonna end up getting hurt no matter what. Why people want to go through that is beyond me. When you're single, you don't have to go through all that, you know?"

I nodded my head and looked down. She did have a point, a very good one. People do get hurt, some more than others.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" she asked. I slowly shook my head.

"Why don't you have one?"

I shrugged and said, "It's not important. It's in the past right? It's better to look at the future."

She just looked at me intently for a moment and then looked ahead nodding her head slowly. We then grew silent again.

"Have you ever been in love?" she asked softly all of a sudden. I was surprised at how she said it. All this time she had this sort of happiness to her when she spoke, but when she spoke those words, something had changed. She seemed a little sadder.

I looked up and turned my head to look at her. We had stopped walking and she was looking across the street. I tore my gaze away from her and over to where she was looking. A couple were walking hand in hand on the sidewalk, laughing happily. I then looked back at her finding her eyes still fixed on them.

"Have you?" she asked again looking me in the eyes. I looked at her eyes for a moment and then slowly nodded, "Once."

"What was her name?" she asked with the same softness, same sadness.

"Leighanne," I said quietly. Nicole looked down at her hands and then back up at me. She didn't say a word, she just walked over to the edge of the sidewalk and sat down. I followed her and set down my ice cream.

"What...what does love feel like?" she asked looking me in the eyes.

"You mean, you've never been in love?" I asked. She frowned and shook her head.

"What does it feel like?" she repeated.

"Well, I believe there's one person out there for everyone, soul mates as people would say. I thought Leighanne was mine, I was so sure of it. When I first saw her, I immediately wanted to get to know her. Just the sight of her made me grow weak. Everything about her made me feel...good. Whenever we were together, it's like the whole world just stopped and it was only me and her. That's what it felt like anyway. I always thought about her. I could never get her out of my head. I was thinking one night when we were in bed, and I thought to myself that I would even die for her..." I said. I then looked over at Nicole who was just staring at me. "Can you believe that? I'd die for her. That's how I knew I was in love with her."

"Do you still love her?" she asked softly. I nodded my head and said, "I'm always going to love her."

"That's really sweet," she smiled at me. I couldn't help but smile myself. Her smile was infectious.

"It's getting a little cold," she said rubbing her arms. I looked up at the sky and found a few black clouds rolling in.

"I'm sorry I don't have a jacket. Do you wanna go home now?" I asked getting to my feet. I took her hand and helped her up.

"Could you? I'm pretty tired," she said.

"Yup, come on," I said. I led her back to the jeep and got in the car. I started up the engine and headed to her and Madeline's apartment.

"I hope you had a nice time," I said as I turned into the parking lot and slowed the car down.

"I had a great time Brian, thanks a bunch," she smiled at me. She then leaned over and pecked me on the cheek. I grinned and couldn't help but become a little shy.

"I'll see you later Bri," she said as she opened the door and began to get out.

"Good night," I said after her. She smiled at me and closed the door lightly, afterwards walking up to her door. I watched after her and couldn't help but feel like I was forgetting something. Before she could open the door, I quickly opened my car door and jumped out.

"Nicole! Wait!" I yelled after her. She spun around and looked at me curiously.

"Do you wanna go to dinner or somethin' tomorrow night?" I asked. Her face broke out into a huge smile and she nodded quickly.

I grinned and said, "See you tomorrow then."

"Yup, bye Brian!" she waved and then opened the door and walked in. I sighed happily and slid back into the car. I started up the car again and put it in gear. As I drove down the street, I reached over and switched the radio on. Monica's "Angel of Mine" was playing. I slightly smiled to myself and hummed the words lightly.

For months I could have sworn I was in a state of depression. I still think I am. One night can't get rid of that feeling of hopelessness, of loneliness. I didn't think anyone could actually bring a genuine smile to my face, but somehow Nicole did. I put on an act in front of the guys, acting as someone who they have lived with for so long. They didn't know that that person was actually almost gone. I was lying to them, to everyone. I really thought the real Brian was completely gone, but tonight something happened that changed that all around. When I was with Nicole, I didn't even know it, but I was me again. Maybe only for a minute, but I was me. I wasn't putting on an act for her in those couple minutes. That had to mean something, I just didn't know what.