I inhaled deeply and sighed at the smell of lemon cleaner. I scrubbed down the countertop, only wincing once at the pain in my chest. I preferred the physical pain of the surgery over the emotional pain from the phone conversation I had just had. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about it anymore. Try as I might, I couldn’t seem to shake the conversation from my head. It was over. It was truly over with Jacob. I felt a sense of freedom – something I hadn’t felt in quite a while. I bit my bottom lip as tears flooded my eyes. Why are you being so God damn emotional?! I yelled at myself.
I heard the front door unlock and open and I quickly dried my eyes. No need for Nick to know I had been upset. “Sar?” I heard him call from around the corner.
“In the kitchen,” I said simply and continued to clean. I knew Nick would be unhappy with me for cleaning. Hell, he’d be unhappy with me just for being on my feet. Cleaning was my outlet. It was something I did so well whenever I was upset over something. In the hour and a half Nick had been gone today, I found I had cleaned the kitchen, the living room, Connor’s room, Connor’s bathroom and the guest bath. I cleared my throat and turned around to smile at him when he walked in the kitchen. I tried my best to ignore his look of utter confusion. “So how did Connor do this morning at school? I know this living arrangement is weird for him. I hope he handles it alright—“
“Seriously, Sarah?” Nick frowned, placing down the grocery bags from the Whole Foods he must have stopped at on his way home. “What the hell are you doing cleaning the kitchen? You shouldn’t even be on your feet!” He quickly scolded. I caught myself rolling my eyes. Ironic, how the tables had turned; back in the day I was always the one scolding him.
“It’s no big deal!” I tried smiling to prove I was really okay. “I feel great.” I lied a small lie. I didn’t feel great. But I didn’t feel horrible, either. “Cleaning is my outlet, Nick.” I shrugged. “It’s really okay.”
“No, no it’s not okay,” he grabbed my wrist and tugged me towards the couch. “You seriously need to take it easy. Look, you heard the doctor yourself. If you overdo it, the new artery could rupture and then you’re in for a transplant.” He swallowed hard just saying the words. I watched as his face became serious – too serious for my liking, in fact. Nick wasn’t a serious guy. He was always making a wise crack about something. This side of him was new to me and I wasn’t sure I was okay with it.
“Nick, really. I know what I can or cannot handle,” I shrugged him off and glanced down at my hands in my lap. He sighed and glanced around the living room.
“Did you fucking vacuum too?!” By now he was angry. So angry, he stood up and started pacing. “What are you trying to do, huh? Drive me crazy?! I can’t leave you at home because if I do, well you decide to go all Mary Poppins on my ass and go on a fucking cleaning rampage!” I got up and stood in front of him to stop the pacing.
“Nick! You are not my keeper, okay? You have no control over what I say or do, so why bother yelling at me? It’s not making the situation any better,” I put my hands on his chest and pushed him towards the couch in hopes to get him to sit down. No such luck. He, instead, grabbed my hands and held them in his to try and get me to focus.
“Look, I’m not yelling because I’m mad at you exactly,” he sighed, calming down quite a bit. “Sarah, what happened to you really scared the shit out of me. And this whole experience has made me realize how much I need you around. Not just for Connor.” He was talking so softly sure I wasn’t sure he was actually speaking. I felt like these might be thoughts in his head he didn’t want me to hear. “Please…please just take it easy, okay? Put your feet up. Rest. Watch a movie. Let me take care of you.”
I was about to interject until I heard those last six words. Six words I never thought I’d ever hear Nick Carter say. He wouldn’t even say them when I was pregnant with his son. I opened my mouth and then closed it immediately, emitting a smile from Nickolas Carter. “What?” I blushed.
“Never thought you’d hear me say it, did ya?” He chuckled, plopping down on the couch and pulling me down with him. I rolled my eyes and smacked his shoulder playfully. “All kidding aside, I mean it. Just this once let me be there for you and Connor, okay?” He sighed and I nodded. He seemed sincere enough. “Now, care to explain why you needed an ‘outlet’ like cleaning for an hour and a half?” He raised his eyebrows.
I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath. No reason to beat around the bush. “I broke off everything with Jake.” I nodded and opened my eyes to see Nick’s reaction. He nodded once and broke eye contact, then looked back again.
“I’m sorry…” he mumbled. I don’t think he really knew what to say or what to do. I didn’t blame him; it was kind of an awkward situation. His ex-wife/mother of his son just broke up with her very serious boyfriend. What would you say to that? “Is there anything I can do?”
I shrugged with a small grin on my face. “Let me clean?” I joked. He chuckled and shook his head. “Just kidding. I mean, I’d appreciate it if you gave me my space and let me tidy up after myself and Connor. And well, you too, I guess…” Nick cleared his throat.
“I’ll let you clean every once and a while if you promise to try and rest some more. No more spending an hour and a half on your feet, okay? That’s ridiculous and pushing the limit,” Nick sighed and stood up. The conversation (if you could even call it that) about Jake and I breaking up had gone much quicker than expected. I was okay with that. “Deal?”
“Deal,” I grinned and stood up from the couch. “So what’d you buy?”
“Ah!” Nick pointed his finger at me as he headed into the kitchen. “Sit your boney ass down.” He pointed to the couch behind me. I snorted and put my hands in the air as if I were surrendering. I slowly made my way over to the couch and sat down, giggling a little on the way.
“Yes, sir,” I mumbled and saluted him dramatically. He rolled his eyes and started going through the grocery bags, putting the cold items away as he went. I was shocked Nick had gone to Whole Foods. He rarely grocery shopped as it was (knowing Nick if it couldn’t be shoved in a freezer, taken out and prepared in a microwave in ten minutes, he didn’t buy it) but to go all the way to a Whole Foods Market was really impressive.
“I got some fresh fruit, vegetables,” he said as he held up a bag of carrots. “Some meat for burgers I thought we could have sometime this week, um…I got some fruit roll-up things for Connor. I know you said he likes to take those to school with him,” he explained and continued rummaging through the bag. “Oh and I picked up some pasta – I thought we could have lasagna tonight for dinner.” He shrugged. I must have worn my shock all over my face because when he looked at me, he did a double take a laughed. “What’s the expression for?”
“Um. Who are you and what did you do with my ex-husband?” I had to contain myself from laughing. Nick never, ever did the shopping when we were together. Not even when I was pregnant, really.
“Well, that Nick is in the past,” he shrugged with a fairly serious look on his face. “I’m gonna take care of you, remember?” There was that infamous grin. I sighed and bit my bottom lip.
Nick Carter made me want to be independent years ago; he made it so I had to learn to never depend on a man again. I had to be my own person. And here I was, sitting in Nick Carter’s living room six years later. And all I wanted to do was be taken care of again. No man had been able to alter me before Nick Carter. Some things never change.
Author's Chapter Notes:
I know, I know. I have been gone for FAR too long! I apologize. Life has been crazy (excuses, excuses). Truth is, I really lost all motivation with my writing in general. I'm coming back from a VERY long writer's block so please bare with me. I would LOVE some reviews on this just to see if I still have any of my old readers, though I'm somewhat doubtful.
I won't be away as long with this one! I'll try and write more very soon. Happy reading!
I won't be away as long with this one! I'll try and write more very soon. Happy reading!
