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Dear Katie,

I know it has been forever since we’ve spoken, I didn’t leave with my head on straight and I abandoned our friendship but I’m finally getting my life back together and I miss you like crazy. Our brief conversation on the internet didn’t really do it for me and thus I am writing you this email.

It’s been five months, today, that has passed since I left my crazy life in California. Nick called me once a week, every Sunday at three o’clock noon sharp. Emails were written to me every two days, text messages were sent late at nights. I stopped listening after the first month, I couldn’t bear to listen to his voice, and I still wasn’t sure if it was because I was angry with him or because I missed him. I erased every voicemail, deleted every email. Somewhere in there I think okay I know I deleted your messages, I just wanted all of that to be gone, and seeing you brought back some hard but good memories. No excuse though, I royally suck as a friend.

Brian came to see me a couple weeks after I had left, he came to make sure that my knee surgery went smoothly and it did. I have to always wear a knee brace now when I am working out but I could deal. I went and saw Brian last week and Bailey. The divorce was almost final between him and Leigh but the two were still remaining friends and he was finally happy. He told me the Backstreet Boys were going to finish their tour in about two months but it would be Kevin’s last tour with the group.

So how is Nick? You think I would know because his best friend being my best friend and all…well, Brian and I have agreed not talk about he who should not be named. It’s not that I don’t care, because that is far from the truth. Truth is I still kinda love him and he’s the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last when I go to bed. I know you know what it is like to love and lose, you’re off in Europe dancing and had to leave Howie. Brian told me that D misses you and that he like Nick has tried to contact you but you and I are just two of the hardest people to reach.

Are you going to be doing the end of the tour? I know Fatima has called me a bunch of times to get me to come back and finish and she’s tried to reach you. I can’t because well, first my knee just won’t allow it and second I don’t think my heart is strong enough yet.

Let me know as soon as you’re coming back home and I will come see you or you can come here. I have a different job these days, I’m not longer a nurse but doing something that was my first love…gymnastics. No not dong obviously, but coaching. I love it beyond belief and it helps keep my now ass that I actually have in shape.

I truly hope all is well with you. You will always be one of my bestest. Miss and love you.

Hails*

I sent the email to Katie and was about to close out of the internet when I saw I had one new message. I clicked on open and read it.

To: Gymgrl16@hotmail.com
From: NicksOnly1@yahoo.com

I believe you deleted the last three emails I sent you, I sent one each month since you’ve been back home and away from the man who is mine. So, I figured one more try before tying something else.

I just want to thank you for finally seeing things from my point…you and the tall blonde are not meant to be.

I hear you are doing well though and are recovering from my partner’s entourage. Oh you didn’t actually think that big buffoon was who was stalking you, no the guy wasn’t gay just part of my little scheme.

So, you’re thinking, you have what you want so why are you still contacting me right? Well, see thing is I don’t exactly have what I want because Nicky pooh can’t seem to get over your sorry ass. I know you have this thing with Brian that you don’t ask/don’t tell but maybe you should ask because Nick is barely hanging on by a thread and is no good to me.

I wonder if I’ll get to see you on the tour…and it’s not in two months anymore it’s pushed back for another three.

Talk to you soon my dear. Real soon.

XoX