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“Nick let’s go get some coffee or something,” Brian suggested as he watched me pace back and forth in front of him.
“No, I want to be here when the doctor comes back.”
“Nick, she’s in surgery, she’s going to be in there for a couple more hours they said. I’ll go get us coffee,” Brian got up, put a hand on my shoulder and I stopped moving. “She’s going to be okay.” I closed my eyes tight and only prayed that would be the truth. I started my pacing again, and tried to keep my mind open and optimistic. I was pulled from my thoughts with a pair of arms wrapping around me.
“Katie, hi.” I hugged her tighter.
“Have you heard anything yet?” her eyes were red; it looked as though she were crying.
“They said she hurt her spinal cord pretty bad and they have her in surgery.”
“She’s not going to be paralyzed is she?”
“I-I don’t know. She could move her arms but she couldn’t feel her legs. She was so scared going in, it wasn’t like her to be that way and she’s been through so much. It should’ve been me who had fallen…” I couldn’t keep the tears back any longer and they began rolling down my cheeks. Everything became so overwhelming that I couldn’t keep it in. I fell to my knees and Katie was beside me. Before I knew it Brian was next to me.
“Nick? What is it?” Brian put an arm around me.
“I can’t lose her Bri, not again, especially not forever.”
“You’re not going to; she’s going to need you more than ever now though. Come on let’s sit down, it’s going to be a while.” Brian helped me stand up and walk over to an empty seat, handed me a coffee and sat next to me. Katie sat on my other side and rubbed my back.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Five Hours Later*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~“Mr. Carter?” a doctor walked into the waiting room and pulled off his surgical mask.
“Yes?” I stood right up and walked up to him. “How is she, is she okay?”
“The surgery took longer than plan but it was successful. We had to pin in some disk and a rod to support her back but we had to also monitor her heart. Because of her previous heart murmur she did have some heart arrhythmias. We shocked it and it went back to normal. There is about a seventy percent chance that Anastasia may not walk again. However, with support and determination and physical therapy there is a bigger chance she’ll be walking.” I ran my hands through my hair and couldn’t get the idea of Stacie never walking again. I mean this was the girl who runs every day, dances and is constantly on the go.
“When can I see her?”
“She’s in the recovery room right now; it will be a little bit before she’s waking up from the anesthesia. You should just go home and get some rest, it’s already late. You’ll be informed with any other information; she made sure of that before going into surgery. She’s quite a pistol I think she’ll recover in no time.” He shook my hand and I watched him leave.
“It is almost midnight Nick, we should go home and get some sleep,” Brian told me.
“I’m going to stay.”
“Nick, Brian’s right you—”
“She wouldn’t leave me. You guys go, I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“You sure?” Brian asked.
“Yeah, thanks for everything Brian. Katie, thanks for coming down.” I gave them both a hug. Brian gave me one more look before heading out. I couldn’t help myself and walked up to the front desk. “Excuse me,” I said to lady who was filling out some papers.
“Hello Mr. Carter, how can I help you?”
“I know it’s late but I haven’t seen Anastasia since she was brought in over six hours ago and I just need to see her. I won’t wake her up I just need to see her.”
“She’s on the third floor, room 303, but I didn’t tell you?” she winked at me and went back to her paper work.
“Thank you!” I walked briskly over to the elevator and pressed floor three. My stomach had butterflies in it as the elevator opened and I walked down the hall to room 303. As I reached it, I took in a deep breath and slowly opened the door to not make a noise. I shut the door as quietly as I had opened it and moved closer to her bed. She was hooked up to a bunch of monitors, and she was lying flat on her back. Her pale skin blended with the white sheets. I felt myself becoming emotional again and tears stung my eyes. I pulled up a chair to her bed and sat in it.
“Hi Beautiful,” I whispered. “I’m so sorry this happened to you. If I could I would take your place.” I took her hand into mine and stood up. I placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and brushed the back of my hand on her soft cheek. I sat back down, still holding her hand and before I knew it I fell asleep.
~*~*~*~
“Nick?” My head shot up when I heard my voice. It took me a minute to figure out where I was.
“Hailey? Oh, I’m so glad to see those eyes.” I stood up and leaned over her bed and gave her a kiss.
“Could I have some water?” she asked in a hoarse voice. I looked around and saw a pink pitcher of water and a glass next to her bed. I poured her a glass and brought it to her lips.
“Want me to go find you a straw?” I asked when I saw her struggling to get her head up enough.
“No, just a little help please.” I put my hand behind her head and gently lifted it up so she could take a few sips from her water. “Thanks.”
“How are you feeling baby, do you want me to go get a doctor?”
“I want to go home Nick.”
“Oh sweetie I know, we just have to wait until you get a little stronger.”
“I haven’t talked to a doctor yet Nick…am I going to walk again? Because I’ve been trying but I can’t move my legs, but I feel them.”
“The doctor said you have about a seventy percent chance of walking but it’s going to depend on how hard you’re willing to work during physical therapy. But I know you, and you’re going to get through this. I’ll be by your side during the whole thing.”
“Nick your tour; you can’t put it off any more.”
“Listen to me; I am with you through all of it. You can’t get rid of me. Now I’m going to buzz in a doctor so he can go over anything else you need him to.”
“Nick, I’m so sorry this all happened.”
“Shh, it’s all over now,” I gave her another kissed and hit her call button.
~*~*~*~
The three days passed slowly, I felt myself gaining strength each day but I was surprised at how much pain I was in every time I moved. My doctor had me doing physical surgery yesterday and I was using the bathroom and not a catheter so I was making some progress.
A nurse had just finished helping me get dressed when there was a knock on my room. The nurse opened the door and Nick came in with a bouquet of a dozen yellow and pink roses. I smiled when I saw him.
“Are you ready to rock and roll?” Nick grinned coming up to my bed. He handed me the roses and kissed me.
“She’ll just have to fill out some paper work on her way out but she’s more than ready I believe,” the nurse winked. “You take care,” she patted my shoulder and I thanked her.
“They’re beautiful Nick, thank you.” I smelled the roses.
“I just want you home in my arms. How are you feeling today, a lot of pain?”
“No, not really,” I lied smiling.
“So this is yours?” Nick asked pushing the black wheel chair up to the bed. I nodded my head and shrugged. “You won’t be in it too long,” he put the breaks down and put one arm under my legs, I put my arm around his shoulder and he wrapped his other arm around my waist. I took in a sharp breath as he lifted me up and placed me into my chair. He then took my bag and put on my lap, took the breaks off and pushed me out to the front desk to sign my release forms.
*~*~*~Nick’s Home~*~*~*
The ride home to Nick’s was quiet and I stared out the window for the most part. Nick got out, took my wheel chair out of the trunk and brought it to the passenger side of the car. He opened the door and I undid my seat belt.
“You want to try to get out or do you want me to lift you up?” So this is how it’s going to be, I thought.
“I’ll try, just keep the chair sturdy?” Nick nodded his head and held the chair. I took off the arm rest that was held in with two pins, set it next to me and put my hands on the chair. I lifted myself up shakily and started to pull myself over but couldn’t finish. Nick saw me struggle and helped me. After I was seated, he lifted my legs from the car and put them and the foot rests. “One day at a time, right?” he asked looking into my eyes.
“Right,” I whispered and he kissed my cheek.
“I’ll bring you in and then come get your things,” he pushed me up to the door, unlocked it and propped the door open. He had to tilt the wheel chair on the back wheels to get up over the stoop and then pushed me inside.
“It feels good to be home…well, with you.”
“Baby this is your home too,” he bent over and kissed the top of my head. We went into the living room and before I could react to what I saw I was overwhelmed with a great big “SURPRISE!” A.J., Howie, Kevin, Brian, Katie, Trisha and my brother Nathan.
“Welcome home girl,” Katie came and gave me a hug.
“Looking good beautiful,” A.J. gave me a kiss.
“If you ever scare me like that again, I will kill you,” Nathan wrapped his arms around me and kissed my cheek. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get here earlier.”
“It’s okay, I’m glad you’re here,” I smiled. I looked across the room and saw Brian leaning against the wall. His eyes were on the ground and I wheeled myself over to him. “Not going to say hi?” His eyes met mine but he didn’t say anything. His eyes were about to spill over with tears. “Brian?”
“God I’m so sorry,” he went to turn away but I reached up and grabbed his hand.
“Brian come here,” he fell to his knees and put his arms around me. The room grew quiet as his sobs got louder. “Bri what’s going on?” I looked up to Nick and he shrugged his shoulders as though he didn’t know what was wrong.
“I’m sorry,” he got up and walked out of the room and Nick and Kevin followed him.
“He’s been beating himself up for what happened,” Katie told me.
“Nick hasn’t said a thing about it. When I asked him why Brian hadn’t come seen me at the hospital he said he was just busy.”
“He blames himself, he’ll come around.” Howie said. “You’re looking great though Hailey.”
“Thanks. I’m happy all of you guys are here.”
“Well, we’re having a cook out and hanging. But we won’t be staying late because I’m sure you’ll want to sleep in a real bed. Now come on, let’s get you some real food.” Katie wheeled me to the kitchen where we went out the sliding glass door.
I ate salad and a turkey burger talking with my friends and brother when Nick came out.
“I bet that tastes like heaven unlike the hospital food,” he laughed.
“Oh it does,” I muffled with a mouthful. “B okay?”
“Well, he went home, he said he things to do. But he’ll come see you tomorrow.”
“Nick, don’t lie for him. What’s going on?”
“He thinks your accident is his fault and he can’t face you right now.”
“How? He saved our lives pretty much.”
“Give him some space babe. He’ll be alright. I’m going to get a plate, need anything else?”
“No thanks,” my voice trailed off as I thought of Brian.
Nick’s POV
As I piled food onto my plate I looked over to Hailey and felt a pain in my heart. I knew she wanted Brian to be there, the two of them had become real close. I watched as she tried to hide her worries and laugh through whatever anyone would talk about.
The next couple of hours everyone caught up with each other, and tried their best not to feel sorry for Hailey’s condition.
“And then A.J. dumped his drink all over my Dad’s shirt,” Trish laughed telling about the story of A.J. meeting her father for the first time. When I didn’t hear Hailey’s laughter I looked over and saw her grimacing and adjusting herself in her chair. I stood up and walked over to her.
“You need anything?”
“My back and legs are cramping up,” she whispered. I looked around and saw that everyone was done eating; Kristen and Kevin had cleaned up the mess.
“You should probably lie down; it’s been a long day for you.” She nodded her head closing her eyes briefly. “You’re hurting aren’t you?”
“I’m sorry, I love you for this party, I don’t want to ruin it.”
“Not at all, everyone is about done any way and your brother is spending the week here. They’ll understand.”
“Thank you,” she pulled on my neck and gave me a kiss.
“Welcome. Alright everyone hate to do it but it is time to call it a night. I am making this one here get some rest even though she doesn’t want to. Sorry baby,” I winked at her.
“We should actually head out, it’s getting late. We will call you soon Hailey. Keep staying strong.” Kevin gave me her hug and kiss.
“Thanks for coming,” she hugged back. She said her goodbyes to everyone and we went back into the house.
“Have a good time?” Nathan asked Hailey.
“I did. You?”
“I’m just glad you’re alright. Hails?”
“Yes?”
“Do you want to come home? I can take care of you ya know?”
“You can’t leave your job.”
“I can make something work, I told Mom I’d protect you and I haven’t done such a great job of that.”
“It’s okay, you’ve done great with me. I’m a big girl you can’t protect me 24/7 Nate. But Nick can take care of me too. We are really trying to make this work; I want to be with him.”
“I know, he’s a good guy for you.” Hailey nodded her head.
“I need to lie down Nathan, see you in the morning?”
“You got it.”
“Ready to head up?” I asked her.
“Yeah, you ready to carry my ass?” she laughed.
“Always,” I smiled at her and picked her up carefully. She lied her head on my shoulder and I brought her up to my room. Gently lying her down on my bed I sat on the edge of the bed. “Better?”
“A lot, help me with my P J’s?”
“Like you have to ask,” I took off the pair of jean shorts she had on and slipped off her tee shirt. “God you have an amazing body,” I softly rubbed my hand on her tummy. “How about you just wear one of my tee shirts?”
“I would love to,” she smiled and propped herself up on her elbows as I slipped one of my tee’s over her head. “Alright, I need to go to the bathroom, brush my teeth and wash my face.”
“Someone is demanding tonight,” I laughed, scooped her up and brought her into the bathroom. “How do you want to do this?”
“Set me on the toilet, I can go to the bathroom myself,” she laughed. “But then you’ll have to bring me to the sink. How about you go get my chair?”
“I was planning on it,” I lifted the toilet lid and set down on it. “I’ll be back up in a minute.” She nodded her head and I walked out of the bathroom to get her chair. I carried it up the steps and then pushed it into my room and knocked on the door.
“I’m ready,” I heard her say. I opened the door and pushed her chair in and helped her into it. I handed her her toothbrush and paste. We brushed our teeth together and she had to lean over the sink to spit but was happy at how well she was able to move around. I helped her wash her face and then pushed her into my room.
“This is going to get old,” she sighed as she watched me take my shirt off and slide out of my jeans.
“Hey it can only get easier from her though you have to remember,” I picked her up and set her on the bed. She winced a little and whispered ‘sorry’.
“I know but it’s still frustrating. I mean I don’t get it, I can feel my legs, I feel when you touch them or when I do but I’m constantly trying to even move my toes and I just can’t.”
“Your nerve when through damage and they need to heel like the doctor said. I think when you start physical therapy on a regular base you’ll get there.”
“Nick, are you sure you’re okay with me being here? I know it’s going to be a lot for you to take care of me and I could go home with my brother, I just—”
“Shh,” I put a finger up to her lips. “I want to do this more than you’ll know. I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on anything else if you were gone.”
“I love you Nick.”
“And I love you Hailey James,” I gave her a long kiss and we fell asleep.