Act Three
(It is now midnight, and Juliet stands out in her balcony halfway atop the castle. She looks up at the stars with her fist rested upon her cheek. She ponders deeply. Romy and his crew arrive at the mansion again, but they stood outside of it.)
Benny: Why are we back here again, man? I wanna go home...
Romy: No, not yet...I want to see her again...she's the one for me, I know it.
Cutie: You said that about that Christyn chick on 4th street.
Benny: And Sandra from across the street from me...which reminds me. That ho owes me $40 dollas!
Cutie: And lest we forget, Lady Delilah...who wasn't really a lady at all.
Benny: And Little miss--
Romy: ALRIGHT! I fuckin' get it, I'm a sucker for love...but this bitch...she da ONE. I know it, y'all...Now, where could she be?
(They start to look around for at least 5 minutes. Suddenly, they hear a woman talking to herself atop the mansion's balcony. They stop to listen.)
Juliet: Oh, Romeo...Romeo...why in the name of GOD do you have to be Romeo? This is complete bullshit, my love. If I wasn't a Capulet, I would be in your arms right now...but I can't. It's not fair. Montague...what the FUCK is that? I mean, it sounds ugly and shit...but in reality, what's in a name? Which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet...but your name...your last name...it sucks. (she sighs heavily) Now that we've met, I wish things were different between us...
Romy: Pssst....PSSSST!
(Juliet looks down from her balcony and sees Romy trying to climb up the tower.)
Romy: Well then, from dis day on, baby...I'll never be Romeo Montague...I'll just be yo' Romy-Rome...and--
(struggles to get to the top) hol' up...(...STILL tries to make it to the top) WHOO! Gimme a minute, babe...
Juliet: Take your time, my love.
Romy: 'Ight...(holding on for dear life, he finally makes it to the top. His feet are settled onto two gargoyle statues for balance.)
Romy: Ever heard of an elevator, babe?
Benny: (from below) Ever heard of Slim Fast? (they laugh out loud)
Romy: (mouths to them) Fuck...You. (to Juliet) Ahh...baby girl...you have made my night...have I told you how beautiful you are?
Juliet: Many a time, my strange love.
Romy: Well, I'mma say it again...you are so FINE! And your eyes be like....like...(he looks down to his friends) Help?
Benny: Say, hu' eyes are like two shiny blue sapphires, and that glisten beautifully in the sun...
Cutie: (Just looks at Benny.) I knew you was fruity, man. Just say, that she gots hootas the size of cantelopes!
Benny: And that her hair are like strands of gold...and--
Cutie: 'Ey, man...shut up! Man, you gay than a motherfucka...
Benny: Fuck you, Mercutio!
Cutie: Don't call me dat! Name sound like a damn pasta...Benvolio with skrimp on the side. HA!
(Benny and Cutie get in a scuffle down below, whereas Romy and Juliet are still talking at the balcony.)
Romy: Let's get hitched.
Juliet: What? Are you serious?
Romy: Like a heart attack, boo boo. Whadaya say?
Juliet: That sounds like a great idea, Romy...finally, someone that will love me for me.
Romy: Sho' ya right. (gives out a big ass smile)
(Juliet leans down and kisses him lightly.)
Juliet: You're the strangest man ever I've seen, but right now, you mean so much to me. What time shall I meet you for our union?
Romy: 9 am, baby gur'. Sharp.
Juliet: I won't be late. I promise you that. Let us meet at the Catholic church on Sprewell.
Romy: Cool.
(the nurse calls her from her bedroom.)
Juliet: (to her nurse) I'm coming. (to Romy) Ohh, I cannot wait, Romy. To run my fingers through your silky blonde hair...to--
Nurse: JULIET!!
Juliet: I SAID I'M COMING! Damn...(to Romy) to kiss your lips once again...(leans in, and kisses him again) and again...
Romy: Preach, baby, PREACH!
Juliet: But, for now, you must go...if they find you hanging around, they'll place a cap in your ass. Rest assured.
Romy: Baby, they ain't finna do shit to me. Let them come. I can take them bustas on one by one.
Juliet: They carry magnums and sawed off shotguns.
Romy: (quickly climbing down) I'mma go.
Juliet: (to Romy as he climbs down) Farewell, farewell, to thee, and let me rest. For your words are now a keepsake that I'll hold unto my breasts.
(As Romy heard her say the word 'breasts', he starts to fall into a daze.)
Romy: Breasts...sweet, supple--(he slips) BREASTS!!!
(Juliet laughs, and walks out of the balcony, and closes the door. As Romy fell on his ass, Benny and Cutie look down, and start laughing like crazy.)
Romy: Man...it ain't right to laugh at a man that's soon to be married.
Benny and Cutie: ...say WHAT?!
Romy: Juliet and I are engaged! Isn't that great?
(Benny smacks him upside the head)
Benny: Man...you're FUCKED for life, bro'.
Romy: What do you mean?
Benny: What do you mean, what do I mean?! That means, you cain't fuck any ol' girl anymore an' shit. You're gonna be on LOCKDOWN!
Romy: Number one, I WANT to be on lockdown, and number two, I'm not missing much, since she will be my first.
(Benny and Cutie stepped away from him, terrified.)
Benny: So all this time, we've--
Cutie: Been hanging out with a virgin...a CLEAN mu'fucka...
(They both run off screaming their heads off, and left Romeo pondering, and swooning a little.)
Romy: (while looking up at the balcony) Soon, babe...soon, we will be togetha fo'eva. Just wait.
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Skin created by Kali & edited by Karen.