[ - ]
Table of Contents [Report This]
Printer Chapter or Story Microsoft Word Chapter or Story
- Text Size +
Act Four

(The very next day, Romeo arrives at the church, which was ran by Friar Littrell. He looked around for him, but he didn't see him anywhere. Suddenly, he hears music playing in the next room, so he goes to the side door, and opens it.)

Romy: Yo, Fri! Father?

(The Friar is listening to “In Christ Alone”, a song that he performed at a recent ceremony.)

Romy: 'EY, YO!

(The Friar jumps out of his seat with a yelp.)

Friar: Don't sneak up on me like that, like you have no home trainin'!

Romy: My bad, your Eminence.

Friar: It's alright...(he brushes off his black outfit) What can I do you for? (the Father of the church had a Southern accent, not usual around these parts. His main outfit was a long sleeved black silk shirt, and black jeans with matching dressshoes. For some odd reason, it would turn the women of the parish on, and they now practically live in the confessioner's booth because of their 'inhumane' thoughts.)

Romy: Well, I met someone.

Friar: Alright...so?

Romy: So? SO?! Man, she's BOOTYFUL! I mean, she gots a BANGIN' body, and a bodacious as--

Friar: 'EY! You're in church, boy.

Romy: My bad...I was wondering if you could, you know, hook a brotha up. We need you to marry us.

Friar: M...Marry you? Son, how old are ye'?

Romy: Should it matta? Come on, man...are you gon' marry us or not?

(The Father stands there, pondering, looking up at the crucifix.)

Friar: O, Lord. What should I do? I mean, how old is he? 12? Please, give me an answer...

Romy: Well?

Friar: Yes.

Romy: ALRIGHT! She's gonna be here in a half hour, and--

Friar: On one condition.

Romy: Name it, Holy bro'.

Friar: Before I marry you and your beautiful bride, I want you to go and fetch me...some--

Romy: What?

Friar: Kool Aid.

Romy: Ok, and—say what now?

Friar: Ye' heard meh. Go to the store on the corner of Lexington, and bring me some Cherry Berry Kool Aid. It's a sin ta drink it, but it's so daggone (sings it a la a church song) gooood. (stomps his foot twice, holding his chest and shaking his head, for he felt the 'Holy Ghost') Testify, somebody...

Romy: Uh...ok...

(Romy backs out of the church..in a HURRY, and goes to the store to purchase the Friar's request. A while later, he returns with a bottle of his sinful elixir, and hands it to him.)

Romy: (out of breath) They...they ran out of Cherry Berry...they..they only had Blue RazzMaTazz...WHOO...

Friar: Blue Ra--(sighs heavily) this will HAVE to do, I guess...

Romy: (on the ground) um...could you get a wigga some oxymagen...?

Friar: I mean, he could have gotten Strawberry Surprise, but this taste like shi--

Romy: 'Ey, man! Can we get on with this?

Friar: Oh...yes.

(Meanwhile, Romy and the Friar awaits Juliet's arrival. They hear footsteps, and look at the entrance. There Juliet stood, wearing a white dress, and her hair flowing as she walked down the aisle.)

Romy: Good Lord Almighty! (he adjusts his tie, and waits for her to come closer to him. As she finally approaches him, she stands at his side, holding his hands.)

Friar: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join these two lovers, in holy matrimony. Let us pray...

Romy: hey, hey hey! We ain't got time for that, man! Get on with it!

Friar: Boy, don't you rush me in this House.

Romy: Um, we got bills to pay, bro, so come on wit' it.

Friar: Fine, y'all married. Now, git!

(Romy and Juliet share their first kiss as husband and wife, but they couldn't sleep in a bed as a couple yet. Their families are still quarreling.)

Juliet: I have to go, my Love. Meet me tonight behind the 7/11, the one no one goes to, so we will not be found.

Romy: You got it, babe. Lata.

Juliet: (in trying to fit into his world, she holds up her dainty fist) Lata, my homey. (She smiles proudly)

Romy: (Sweetly) Jay Jay, don't do that. If you do, peoples will bust a cap in your beautiful, round ass, ok? Ok...

Juliet: Sorry...(she weakly smiles, and runs off)

Romy: (sighs happily) What a day this was...(humming the tune to “I'm Lovin' It”, he struts down the street, snapping his fingers.)

(Later that day, Benny, and Cutie are at a sidewalk, shooting dice. Cutie laid out loaded dice, causing everyone else to lose but him.)

Benny: If I didn't know betta, wigga, I say you was cheatin'! (Takes a swig of his 40 ounce)

Cutie: Me? Cheatin'? Man....you gots me AWL wrong, bro'! I wouldn't do dat shit...dat ain't me.

Benny: yeah, 'ight...

(Just then, Big T. rolls up in front of them once again in a Lexus. Cutie was the first person to notice him.)

Cutie: Man...when will he EVER learn? 'Ey, T! T! Don't be comin' up on our turf, bro'! We don't want you hea'!

(Big T. gets out of the car, and walks up to Cutie.)

Big T.: So, we meet again, old friend...

Cutie: what? Dude, I ain't yo' friend, get it straight, bro'.

Big T.: Of course we are, we--(He's instantly cut off, for he sees Romy walking down the street.)

Big T.: We'll talk later. Hey, YOU! Yeah, you!

Romy: Me?

Big T.: Yes...I saw you at the party last night...I have a bone to pick with you...

Romy: Tybalt, I'm not here to fight you, ok? My heart and my mind is too full to let anger and hate in them. Goodbye for now...

(As he's about to walk off, Big T. stops him.)

Big T.: We shall fight!

Romy: I said no.

Big T.: You will pay for disobeying a Capulet!

Romy: Man, nothing gets by you, huh? Now, leave me be, cuz.

(As Big T. was about to charge at him with his piece, Cutie steps in.)

Cutie: Man, he said no, didn't he? Now, take yo' big ass on sum'whea!

Big T.: Never. Not until that Montague is dead.

Cutie: You a dumb bitch, you know that?

Big T.: I beg your pardon?

Cutie: I say you dumb! You can't take no for an answer...did you hear me that time? Huh?

(Big T. points the gun to his forehead.)

Big T.: I am so sick and tired of you!
(Romy steps in, and tries to calm them down.)

Romy: Come on, y'all. This shit ain't worth fightin' for...Remember what the Sheriff (Prince of Verona) said: if y'all disturb the peace, he'll--

Big T. and Cutie: SHUT UP!

Romy: Ok...(steps back)

(Cutie places his hands on Big T.'s shoulders.)

Cutie: Say, my man...why don't we just kill the violent nonsense, yo'. Ya know, dat shit be played out, man, ya' know what I'm sayin'? So, put that Mag away, and just cool ya' jets, ya feel meh?

Big T.: You know what? (sniffles) you are so right, Mercutio...what the hell was I thinking? I...I always thought that Montagues and Capulets should go together hand in hand, and have a long, lasting universal friendship...You, my friend, have opened my eyes. Thank you...

Cutie: (Gives him a shit eating grin) You are so welcome, my big white bro'. Nah, I'm finna roll...catch ya' later, man...

(Cutie signaled Romy and Benny to come with him to his house. As they walk off, a shot was fired. Romy and Benny turn around to find Cutie on his knees...shot.)

Cutie: AHHH!!!

Romy: Mercutio!!

(Romy bends down to him, shaking him by the shoulders)

Romy: Are you alright? Please, answer me!

Cutie: I've...I've been shot...up my ass!

Romy: NO!!---what?

Cutie: My booty got BLASTED! Ahhh....this was NOT the experience I wanted!!

(Cutie moans and groans after he collapses to the ground. Romy sees Cutie's gun on the ground and picks it up.)

Romy: You sick motherfucker...you WILL pay fo' dat!

Big T.: I didn't do it.

(Romy looks over behind Tybalt to find a big breasted woman in a pink robe, and fake hairpiece on.)

Woman: I had to teach dat fucka a lesson! He hasn't paid chil' support in 3 yeas! Drag dat mu'fucka ova hea'!

(Benny and Romy drag Cutie over to the woman, and she instantly attaches her hand around his ear.)

Woman: let's go, you cheatin', stealin' muthafucka...

Cutie: Man...give me 'til next week...my SSI check ain't came yet, Boo Boo...

Woman: Don't 'Boo Boo' me! You still talkin' out ya' ass an' shit, don't play wit' me!

Cutie: How can I talk out my ass when yo' ass blew it up?!

Woman: Shut up, and let's go...

(As she drug him down the road, Benny, Big T., and Romy stood in shock.)

Romy, Big T., Benny: DAMN.