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CHAPTER 11
I heard the steady beep of the phone and turned over on my side, feeling nothing but an empty space on the other side of the bed. I let the tear slip out and shook my head. Well, what else did I think would happen? I rolled over to the table next to the bed and flipped my phone open. There was a text message from D, saying that he was sorry that he couldn’t stay but that he and Leigh were headed out today. And that he had no regrets about last night and that I shouldn’t either. I slammed my phone shut and heard the door open.
“Good, you’re awake…what’s wrong?”
“I got a message from D.”
“A phone call?”
“Hell no. I don’t deserve that. I’m just the woman he sleeps with, why the hell would I get a phone call. No, he left me a damn message. Saying he had to head out with Leigh and that I shouldn’t regret last night because he didn’t! What a damn jerk! I was the lay he needed to get his mind off of his soon to be wife.”
“I thought the wedding wasn’t takin’ place until next year, till after the touring.”
“Geez Carter, where have you been? It’s now three months away!”
“Hey, don’t take you’re anger out on me!” I ran my hand over my eyes, hoping that the tears wouldn’t come. But, they didn’t listen and before I knew it, the sobs were coming. “Hey, now, I didn’t mean to do this.” Nick walked over to the bed and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
“Why didn’t I say no? Why was I actually hoping this time would be different? Why do I have to love him?”
“Theresa, Howie has got to be the biggest fool around. I really am sorry that this all happened like this. I wish there was something I could do. I mean, I wish I never suggested this place.”
“Nick, you did a good thing. You didn’t know anymore than I did that I would run into him.”
“I still feel horrible.”
“Don’t, please don’t. You’ve been the greatest throughout all of this and I truly can’t thank you enough for it.”
“Wanna head home?” I looked up at him through tear filled eyes and nodded my head. “No problem.” He placed a kiss on my nose. “Go take a shower and get ready. That might help some.”

“What’s so urgent?” I stopped my pacing and turned to look at Nick. I clenched my hands and shook my head. I turned and started pacing again. “Okay, you’re freakin’ me out. What’s going on?”
“I need you to go with me.”
“Fine, go where?”
“To the doctor’s office. I just took a test and it’s coming out positive.”
“Doctors? Test? Positive…no way. Ain’t no way!”
“How do you think I’m feeling? I’m late, I just, it can’t be.”
“D is getting married in less than a month and you’re telling me you could possibly be pregnant?”
“Hush, Nick. People just like to walk into my house!” He sat down on my couch and held his head in his hands.
“There’s no way. From one time?” I shrugged and looked away.
“Four times.”
“And he was protected.”
“Nope.”
“WHAT? What the hell were you thinking?”
“Nothing, just how good it felt. Look, I know it was stupid, but now, of all times, I need you.” I sat down next to him and he turned to look at me.
“If you are, and you can carry it, what are you planning on doing?” I stared out into space for a moment before I turned haunted eyes to him.
“I have no clue.”
“You won’t tell him?”
“Not in a million years. I’d rather marry you and ask you to play dad to it.” He shook his head.
“He needs to know.”
“No and you can’t tell him either! Promise me, Nick!” He glared at me and jumped off the couch.
“Howie doesn’t know there was a first kid. Now you’re asking me not to tell him there’s a second kid?”
“Yes, that’s what I’m asking. Please, if you love me, you won’t tell him.”
“Are you ready?”
“Nick?”
“I won’t tell. Now, can we go?”

I cried, I cried for almost two days straight. Nick was my house that whole time and he just kept telling Megan, AJ, or anyone else that stopped by that he had no clue what was wrong. But he knew. I knew and had no idea what to do. I couldn’t hide for nine months. Not from these people who mean the world to me. I didn’t believe in abortion, and something told me that this time around, I wasn’t going to have a miscarriage. I wrapped my arms around my legs and rested my head upon my knees. I heard a faint knock and muttered out a ‘come in’. I turned my head and Megan smiled.
“Wanna talk?”
“Nothing to talk about.”
“Sure there is. There’s a lot to say.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not in the mood right now.”
“Look, Theresa, we’ve been best friends for I don’t know how long. I know something is really bothering you and it’s killing me that you’re not sharing.”
“I just need…”
“Alone time. I’ve heard that for two days now. Just because things went sour with Howie, doesn’t mean you can dodge the world you know? It’s time to face up and move on.”
“Megan…I’m sorry, just, please leave.” She nodded her head and walked out the door, closing it behind her. I knew she meant well and that she was just trying to boost me up, but she had no clue and her words stung. But, she was right. I needed to move on.

“Nick, what’s wrong with her?”
“I don’t know Age.” He glanced at him. “Honestly.”
“Don’t lie to me, little man. That’s my sister! You know something that you’re not sharing!”
“I can’t…I can’t tell you.”
“You had better start tellin’ or I’m gonna start hurtin!”
“Than hurt Howie, this is all his fault.” Nick closed his eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“If I tell you, you can not tell Theresa you heard it from me.”
“Fine.”
“And you can not tell Howie.”
“I don’t like this, but fine.”
“A few years ago, Theresa was pregnant and had a miscarriage. Now, she’s getting ready to have another one and the doctor said she should be able to carry it to term.”
“Are you telling me that damn man screwed my sister over twice and is leaving her to handle this shit alone?”
“Yes.”
“And you knew and didn’t bother to tell me?”
“She asked me not to!”
“Well, I didn’t promise not to tell D, either.” Nick turned and glanced at Megan as she walked down the stairs.
“No, she begged and pleaded with me not to tell him. You can’t Megan.”
“No way in hell. D has loved her forever! He just refuses to admit it or examine his true feelings. It’s time to see what’s staring him in the face!”
“Megan, I’m asking you as a friend. She doesn’t want him to know. Hell, she didn’t want you to know. Why do you think she’s kept this to herself? Why do you think she’s going through this alone? She knew exactly what would happen, exactly what would get said and done. She didn’t want to end the friendships that have formed over the years.” AJ sighed, not knowing what to do. He knew Howie loved his sister; there was no doubt in his mind about that. Why the little man did not fess up to it though, was no one’s guess. And now finding this out, this was all the more reason for Howie to be by her side.
“What are you thinking about honey?” He glanced down at Megan than over at Nick.
“We all know that Howie as loved my sister. Why he’s still going through with marrying this woman is beyond all of us to understand. I have a feeling he’s scared though, and that’s why he keeps running back to Leigh. But, I feel that maybe we should honor Theresa’s feelings.”
“Thank you,” Nick breathed. Age glanced over at him.
“To some degree. It’s killing me that she had to go though through this alone the first time. I refuse to let her go through this a second time alone. We can only ask Howie how he feels and if by the time his wedding comes and he still refuses my sister, well, than maybe we should just change his mind a little.”
“Theresa would kill you if she thought that the wedding was over because of her.”
“Nick, I know this, but Theresa has loved him for just as long as he’s loved her. She’s put her feelings out there and he comes just using her. Although, I don’t think he’s just using.” AJ felt his phone vibrate and flipped it open. “Hey D. Yeah, what’s up? Okay, okay, at 7. Yeah. I can see if she’ll come. She’s been feeling really horrible. Something she caught in Laughlin. Yeah, I’m hoping it’s not serious either. Cool, catch ya later.” With that he hung up his phone.
“What was that all about?” Megan asked as she pulled out a chair and sat down at the kitchen table.
“That was Howie and he wanted all of us to attend a dinner. This Saturday at 7. He asked if Theresa would make it.”
“Don’t you find it funny that he would ask that knowing how he feels?”
“I think he just needs to see her, needs to feel her presence.”
“Whatever he wants, he’s not going to get it. I am not going to his dinner!” All eyes turned to the bottom of the stairs.
“Hey sis. How you feelin?”
“Better after Megan came up and talked to me. But I repeat, I am not going Saturday?”
“For me, since I won’t have anyone to talk to? Everyone has someone to talk to or to be with it. I’ll be all alone.” I rolled my eyes at Nick. Damn it, he knew he was smooth. I glared at him and walked over behind Megan and AJ.
“Fine. But, I’m only going to so you’re not alone. And I’m not staying for the whole thing.”