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CHAPTER 4
Four hours later, I rolled my eyes as I heard someone pounding on my door. I wiped my eyes, trying to clean off the mascara and dried up tears. I got up off the couch and walked over to the door, surprised to find Nick standing there.
“May I come in?” I stepped aside and opened the door wider, ushering him in. He smiled and walked over to the couch and plopped down.
“Can I get you something to drink?”
“Nah, but come sit down next to me. I want to talk to you.” I sat down on the couch and curled my legs underneath me.
“What’s on your mind little man?” He smiled.
“You. I’m…well, there’s no easy way to put it.”
“Nick, just say what’s on your mind.”
“Do you still love him?” I took a deep breath and glanced around my living room. How the hell do you answer that?
“Yes, I still do. Isn’t that sad?”
“No, it’s great. I wish I could have a girl love me like that. Or rather love me forever. I just hop I would not be so blind to see it like he is.”
“You do. You have millions of adoring fans!”
“You’re not funny. Really Resa, it’s sad that he tossed your loved aside. Doesn’t he see?”
“He did, once. A long time ago…”
“But what?” I shrugged, not knowing how to go on. Yes, once upon a time there was a chance for D and I. But then, we were a little drunk. I closed my eyes, so scared to think of that time. It was great, it truly was, although, the after affect wasn’t. “Theresa, don’t shut me out.”
“I’m not Nick. I just don’t want to think back to that time. It really hurts and it’s left better in the past.” I wiped the tear that was falling and shook my head. “Since I found out, all I have done is cry. How sad is that, huh?”
“It’s not, that’s what I’m trying to tell you. But, I would keep wasting my times on someone who doesn’t love me back.” I snorted at that. “What?”
“No one knows the shit I went through for that man, not even him. No one understands why I love him.”
“What are you talking about?” I got up off the couch and walked over to the wall. I scanned over the pictures, seeing so many smiling faces of my friends and family. “Theresa, talk to me.” I felt his hands on my waist and turned into his embrace. I wrapped my arms around his waist as his arms closed over my shoulders, holding me tight against his chest. We stayed like that, he was the strength I needed and I was about to break a vow I took over two years ago.
“A night, two plus years ago, there was a party, you remember, shortly after you turned 24. A huge bash, and do you remember the huge fight that Leigh and Howie got into?” At his nod, I went on. “Well, I may have had a little too much to drink, but so did he. Anyways, that’s not the point. We stayed up together, late into the night and well, we, I mean, ya know. Anyway, that night, all my feelings came tumbling out. I told him I had loved him for so long, but after he got what he wanted, all he could me was that he loved Leigh and that’s the only woman he could see himself with. Even after that huge fight and all the fights before and most certainly all the fights after. But, do you remember that shortly after that, I had left for a couple of months?”
“Yeah. Age said you went to visit your mother or something like that.”
“I did, but I had to. I was pregnant.”
“Excuse me?” I had to grin at him.
“I was pregnant. Go figure huh?”
“What happened to the baby?” I could feel the tears start coming and I sighed as he started massaging my back. “Just talk it out.”
“I had a miscarriage, four moths in. It was a girl.”
“Theresa, did you deal with this on your own?”
“Had to. My mom knew, but when I had the miscarriage, I left her house. She thought I was still pregnant and that I was coming back to confront the father. I never told her who it was. Age didn’t even know and Heaven forbid, D didn’t know.”
“Even if it was a mistake, that never should have been something you had to deal with by yourself. Why?” I pulled out of his embrace and sat down on the edge of the couch.
“Oh, couldn’t you just see me telling everyone? Howie would have flipped and probably claimed it wasn’t his. That he loved Leigh and would never have cheated on her. Age would have killed him for using and abusing me. That would have been the end of a friendship that has been around for far too long.” He knelled down in front of me and cupped my face.
“Listen to me, you’re a very dear friend, and so are the guys. But Age would have done the right think and I don’t think any of use would have said he was wrong. Howie should have been there for you.”
“Nick, just let it go. Please. I’m fine now, really/”
“Oh, I can see that. You’re still crying over it. And the fact that you haven’t told anyone is even more proof.” I rolled my eyes but still couldn’t stop tears. “I’m sorry. Please, stop crying. It’s breaking my heart seeing you this way.” I sniffed and tired to smile. He smiled and briefly placed his lips against me, causing me to grin. “There, but I can do better.” His lips captured mine, causing a small moan to escape my lips. His hands traveled from my face to my hands, holding them within his. He pulled away and gazed into my eyes. “That was not supposed to happen.”
“I can imagine. But ya know, I don’t mind. In fact, I kinda liked it. Would it be wrong of me to ask for another one?” His blue eyes got darker.
“Theresa, I’m not sure I could kiss you one more time and walk away tonight. Please, don’t me that question.”
“I’m not asking you to leave, am I? I’m asking for another kiss. There would only be one reason why I’m asking.” He groaned and pulled me up off the edge and into his embrace, his lips capturing mine, his tongue heating me to the core. I ran my fingers through his blonde locks, scrapping my mails down the back of his neck. He groaned once more hugging me tighter to his body.
“Are you sure?” I pulled back a little and stared into his eyes. I was risking a lot, I knew this. A one night stand for he knew where my heart belonged, even if he was unworthy of if. I had told myself I never wanted a one night stand, but than I went and had one with Howie. Although, I thought more would have come from it. What was one more with Nick?
“As long as we both knew this comes with no strings?” He smiled and lifted me up in his arms. I took that as a yes and directed him back to my room.