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Chapter 23
I gazed into those eyes and my heart melted. His hands caressed my cheek before his head descended as his lips lightly pressed against mine. Deep in the back of my mind, I was curious, wanting to know if he was now going to compare. And I guess I was wondering if he was thinking I was comparing. True, Howie’s lips were damn good, but nothing really compared to having the lips you loved pressed against yours. His tongue traced along my lower lip, asking for access, and I just couldn’t refuse him. My tongue crashed against his, his hands racing over my body, as if he was just exploring it for the first time. He pulled away, his eyes locking with mine once more.
“I love you.” I suppose I really was questioning it cause inside, I knew he was telling me the truth. I should be grateful that the dream really shook him up.
“I love you too, Brian. There’s never been anyone else that I loved.” He smiled, and yet, I could see the question burning there yet he still didn’t ask. But, I wasn’t going to offer that information either. His lips trailed down my jaw and nipped at my ear lobe, before moving down my neck. My breath shuttered and he chuckled, loving every little thing I did.

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My hands quickly undressed her, loving the silkiness of her skin. She closed her eyes as my lips trailed down her neck, my tongue barley running over her nipple. She jumped as my lips closed over it, her arms pulling on the restraints.
“You’re not getting out of that,” I whispered, my mouth still loving her breasts.
“That’s just not fair.”
“I never claimed to be, you know.” My lips roamed down her stomach, smiling as it quivered slightly. I felt my heart start pounding in my chest as I gazed over her. How could I have been so stupid as to risk losing her? I nipped along her legs, kissing all her most sensitive areas, chuckling as she squirmed, moaned, and even sighed. I had wanted to show her just how much she meant to me, I wanted this time to surpass all other times. I really had the full intention of worshiping her like she should have been worshied all along.
“Bri?” My eyes glanced up and she smiled. “What are you thinking?” I kissed back up her body, my lips just slightly above hers.
“Thinking how much I love you, and adore you, and how stupid…” I never finished as she leaned up and pressed her lips against mine. I moaned, as her tongue caressed mine. Well, hell, there went any thoughts of taking this slow, because I just couldn’t. I held her hips as I slid into her, loving her even more as she threw her head back, exposing her neck, but groaning at the same time.

I turned, my eyes taking him in. He was so peaceful in his sleep. I sighed, realizing that had been three hours that we just laid like this, or rather, three hours since I came home. I smiled, knowing that this afternoon, that all of those times in that three hours, he was proving something. To him, or to myself, I wasn’t certain, but I felt it. And I knew, deep within, something was different about these times. I slipped out of bed, leaving the comfort of his arms. I peeked once more at him, really hoping he was asleep. I smiled as I dropped to my knees on the side of the bed, folded my hands, and bowed my head.
“Father, you blessed me with this marriage, and this man. I thank you for that. He truly has my heart. And we both know just how much he’s messed up, and even though it sill hurts, I can’t help but forgive him and love him. With all that I am, I still love him. Father, but I still ask for one thing. I love Terri, even though she’s betrayed me as well, but I don’t want her to be pregnant. Lord, please bless Brian and me with a child of our own. I’m not sure I could handle taking care of a child from them. You know that I would love it no matter what, but it would be like a slap in the face. Please, Lord, grant us a child. In your most precious name, Amen.”

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I laid there, resting as I heard her whispered words. Talk about a knife slicing up your insides. It was comforting to know she forgave me, even though I was having one hell of a time forgiving myself here. And even more amazing to hear her call our marriage a blessing. But it struck me to the core that she admitted she would have one hell of a time raising a kid that wasn’t ours. And it’s not like anyone would blame her. I opened my eyes as she left the room and I let out a breath.
“Lord, please, bless us. And let these feelings I have for my wife’s best friend fade. Please make the devil leave me, because I can’t stand to hurt my wife anymore than what I already have.”