“You know, it really wasn’t necessary for you to say that to Kevin,” AJ said as he sat down across from Lucy at an otherwise empty table. Howie followed suit and sat down beside Lucy.

            “Somebody had to, besides, wouldn’t want the feud to blow over too easily, would we? Wouldn’t have anything to talk about!” Lucy grinned at him and tossed back an entire Mimosa.

            “Besides, it’d be soooo boring if I didn’t have Kevin to yell at every once in a while.”

            The feud between Lucy and Kevin was as arguments went, a hellish brawl of insults and insane pranks. They had been at each other’s throats for the last five years. Lucy had met Kevin through Leighanne many years prior, not because of the band, but because he was Brian’s cousin. Lucy, Amelia, Leighanne, Brian and Kevin had spent a lot of time hanging out as kids and they always got along.

            Years later, when Amelia came on with the band, bringing Lucy along for the ride, Lucy met Howie. She and Howie began a "friends with benefits" pair and Kevin hadn’t been so subtle in his opinion of the two of them. Kevin did a stupid thing when he allowed himself to be overheard by Lucy, when he called her a slut. This ensued in an all out war between the two and ever since, Lucy used whatever ammo she had to throw at Kevin. The lower she hit, the better and there was quite a bit of punching on her part. Lucy was a hard woman, she let no one get in her path, and no one told her what to do, no one. She had a big mouth that was capable of a lot of damage and AJ thought she’d been holding back these past few years.  

            After the initial blow up fight that had caused several body guards called in and Lucy to almost lose her job, they went into the fiercest battle of pranks anyone had ever seen in the history of musical touring. Lucy retaliated by throwing every stitch of Kevin’s clothing into the deep end of the pool. Kevin backfired with stealing Lucy’s passport so that she couldn’t get on the plane the following day. Lucy returned fire when she got back by calling Kevin’s wife and pretending to be a prostitute that Kevin had refused to pay after services rendered.  

            After getting his wife to call off the divorce, Kevin traded Lucy’s daily vitamin supplements with laxatives, then she sneaked in his room, after slipping a ruffie in his drink and shaved his head. He put blue hair coloring in her shampoo, she wrote the words “DICK WAD” on his forehead with permanent marker when he fell asleep on a plane. He put ants in her food, she put a snake in his bed, he locked her in a closet, and she handcuffed him to door of the ladies room and much, much more. Currently, Lucy held the lead by having all of Kevin’s clothing taken in, making him think he’d gained several pounds. That had happened several months ago when Lucy had stayed at Brian and Leighanne’s house for the weekend along with Kevin, his wife and Amelia for Baylee’s seventh birthday party. Kevin was still on his “diet” and no one had the heart to tell him he didn’t have any weight to lose. Everyone had agreed it would be kinder, not to tell Kevin what Lucy had done. Though Amelia knew Lucy had other motives up her sleeve.

            “It’ll be all the worse when I tell him later, and besides, he may be an asshole, but he’s a fine sight to watch working out in the gym,” Amelia had decided not to mention that to Howie. Apart from that, as long as Kevin didn’t realize she was the last one to get him, it meant he’d be on the defensive and extremely vulnerable to a Lucy attack, where as she could relax and not worry he’d be plotting something against her. Regardless of the viciousness, it did add entertainment value to the tour.

            “You have way too much fun torturing him, Luce,” AJ laughed and took his knife and fork in hand.

            “Howie sweetie, could you fetch me another Mimsy?” Lucy turned to Howie, thrusting her empty glass in his face. Howie took the glass and got up, looking a little surprised as he did so.

            “So Agey boy, how long you been on the sauce?” Lucy asked as she speared a link of sausage on her fork from AJ’s plate. AJ blanched.

            “Don’t bleach yourself out totally, or you’ll blow your cover,” Lucy replied, still not looking at him as she stuffed the entire sausage in her mouth and chewed. AJ gave an audible swallow and dared to look over his shoulder. Howie was at the bar getting Lucy’s promised Mimosa so he turned back to Lucy, her black brown eyes were boring holes into him.

            “No one can fool me honey, absolutely no one. I understand you got a problem, one that is real hard to get over, no one can deny that. I also understand that Amelia, was a real bitch, by not calling you for six months. But if you dare, to say that she is the reason why you are pathetically trying to hide the fact that you can’t keep a lid on a bottle, I’ll rip you limb to limb and distribute the pieces all over the tri-state area.” AJ didn’t dare to blink because he knew Lucy was serious.

            “I’ll do you a favor and not tell Howie,” Lucy’s eyes flashed across the room where Howie had stopped to talk to a couple of returning crew members, “Because that would hurt him a lot more than I ever wanted to,” her gaze returned to his. I’ll do you several more favors and not tell the guys, or Leigh or Amelia. But one word out of you blaming your fetish with fucking up your life on my girl Meals, and I’ll have Kevin giving you another couple of scars.”

            “I’d warn you to take it easy on D, but I see Kevin’s cornered the market on that,” AJ replied and was surprised to see Lucy flinch.

            “Just remember, I’ve got the gun and the ammo and I know exactly where to aim it,” Lucy mimed shooting a gun with her thumb and forefinger and winked at AJ as Howie sat down beside her once more.

            “Ah, thonk yah dachling! Thonk ya!” Lucy purred as she pressed a kiss onto Howie’s cheek.

            “Good sausage Aje?” Howie asked as Lucy flung an arm around Howie’s shoulder and sipped her Mimosa with her free hand. Her eyes were still glued on AJ as he replied,