I should’ve stayed… I shouldn’t have left.

His eyes remained closed, but he could clearly hear the voice, echoing in his ears.

Maybe… maybe if I had just sat back down, none of this would’ve happened. Nick could’ve gone and got help by himself just fine. You shouldn’t… *sigh* you shouldn’t be laying here like this.

The echoing eventually stopped, and the voice he heard had finally blended into a solid sound. He fluttered his eyes open, and though his vision was blurred, he could see a figure seated at his bedside, their head hanging down.

You were right, I’m always doing something stupid… I should’ve just listened, should’ve kept my mouth fucking shut and just do what I was told. This wasn’t supposed to happen to you… that bullet was meant for me, but you took it.

He shifted on the bed, thinking that his movement would catch the person’s attention, but to no avail.

This is the second time… the second time you’ve saved my life. You’re always fucking saving me Kev! People think I’m stupid for sounding so hopeful that you’d come back to us… I don’t want you back, I NEED you back. How can I ever repay you…

“Why don’t… you repay me… by letting me sleep.” he said as he fluttered his eyes open once again, his vision becoming clear and revealing AJ, who was now staring back at him.

AJ smiled, “Welcome back big man.”

“I ain’t gone nowhere baby.” Kevin grunted as he tried to look down at his repaired right shoulder. He slowly rose his right hand and grabbed the neckline of his hospital gown, lifting it a bit to look at his bandaged wound, “You think I’m gonna have a cool looking scar?”

“You’re gonna have one badass looking scar.” AJ chuckled, “How you feeling?”

Kevin shrugged as he tried to settle himself more comfortably on his hospital bed, “Thanks to the medication, all I feel is slight throbbing and pressure… like a hot steam roller rolling over my chest. Nothing I can’t handle.” he joked, lowering his voice a little more to sound manlier.

“Nothing can keep you down.”

“Oh, I know of a few things that could keep me down.” Kevin scoffed. “What about you? How’s that hard head of yours?”

“Hard head is right!” AJ laughed, “But I’m okay… they stitched up the multiple lacerations and have me on medication for pain and to continue help fighting an infection that tried to start. I have a lovely concussion, so they’re probably gonna keep me here another night or so.”

Kevin nodded, “And the others?”

“Nick had his head stitched up as well, Howie was just put on an IV for dehydration, as was Brian, but he has bruised ribs and his body will continue to be sore, from that epic tackle we gave him.”

“I’m glad to hear that you’re all okay.” Kevin said with a weak smile as he closed his eyes for a bit, trying to swallow down a wave a pain that had wracked him in that moment. “So, what was with that little soap opera moment you had going on earlier while I was out.”

AJ’s eyes widened a bit, “You heard all that?”

“I just had surgery Alex, I wasn’t dying.” they both laughed at Kevin’s sarcastic remark. “I really don’t know why you’re beating yourself up over what happened to me.”

“Because you were shot, and I just left you.”

“No offense Jay, but what good would you have been for me if you stayed? You would’ve only done the same thing Brian and Howie did, which was nothing… they couldn’t do anything.”

AJ sighed. “I should’ve just done what that fucker said, then this wouldn’t have happened! He even said… that bullet was meant for me, not you. I should be laying there, not you.”

“Can you not try to take this away from me? It’s been a while since Kristin and I were able to do anything intimate with one another, and I heard women find a man that’s been shot really hot, so this could really help me in the be-”

“Alright!” AJ quickly interjected, laughing. “I really don’t need to hear that right now.”

Kevin laughed as well, “But seriously… are you really gonna believe the man that did this to us? That bullet wasn’t meant for anyone specifically Jay… this would’ve happened regardless, and I honestly thank god that it happened to me and not you guys.”

“That’s just it Kev, you’re always saving my fucking ass, and what do I ever do for you in return, besides fuck everything up?”

“You don’t fuck everything up… and you do more for me than you’ll ever know. You live, and that’s all I need in return.”

AJ gave him a warm, genuine smile, “You’re missing the point…”

“No, YOU’RE missing the point. What happened to me was not your fault… it was no one’s fault except for the man that pulled the trigger. You do realize that you and Nick saved our lives, right?”

AJ scoffed, “Yeah, we brought back a demented cop that was in on the fucking scheme.”

“No Alex… you two saved OUR lives more than once. From help arriving to you two tackling the shit out of Brian. This whole situation could’ve escalated to be way worse, but because of you and Nick… we’re all alive in the hospital, and the nightmare is over. You guys saved us.”

“Nick could’ve easily saved us on our own.” AJ said with a shrug.

Kevin peered at him as if he had lost his mind, “Nick… saving us on his own? Yeah, I don’t think so. I’d rather take the chance of trying to save myself than having my fate lie in the hands of a grown ass man who tried to warm up a packaged Pop-Tart in the microwave.”

AJ busted out laughing, “Yeah, you’re right… this is the same guy who was convinced that he and I would be receiving a medal of honor for our ‘heroic acts’.”

“Come again?” Kevin asked in a serious tone, peering over at his younger friend with a ‘you’ve got to be shitting me’ look. “He thought what?”

“Yeah man, he seriously thought we were gonna get a medal of honor. For the life of me, I don’t know who or what gave him that idea, but he was so set on it. At first, we thought he was joking, waiting for a ‘I’m just kidding guys!’ that sadly never came.”

Kevin shook his head, “What are we gonna do with that kid?”

“You’d think I’d get used to him and his stupidity after spending 18 years of my life with him… oh no, and being stuck in the middle of Bumfuck with him proved that. I’m still asking the big Man upstairs why, of all people, I was stuck with him!” AJ joked, “I really don’t know how you were able to put up with him AND me all these years.”

Kevin smiled and sighed, “All these years… and I still don’t have an answer. You and Nick are so much alike, yet so different. I think I was able to do it because you two reminded me so much of myself. Though you guys always viewed me to be a stick in the mud, I knew what it was like to be the youngest; I am the youngest in my family. But, being the eldest of you four, I understood you and Nick the most, more than I let ya’ll on to know.”

“Is that why you always picked on us?” AJ cracked, a small grin graced upon his lips as he picked at his fingers.

“Of course.” Kevin replied with a nod, “It’s what my brothers did to me. And I remember…” he paused for a moment, recollecting his earlier years with his family, “I remember what it was like to look up at my eldest brothers and want to be just like them. They’d expect a lot from me, which is why I expected a lot from you two. What they did built me up to set out and want to make them proud… and that’s exactly what you and Nick did… you’ve made me proud. It made me realize that they made me to be a man of my own, not to be like them, that I wasn’t just their shadow. You two are men all your own, and you both make me so proud.”

AJ sat there in silence, taking in all that Kevin had just said. After a long moment of silence, he finally asked, “Do you remember when your brothers moved out of your house… when they left your family to start one of their own?”

Kevin slowly nodded, his face contorted in confusion, not really understanding where the rebel was going with his question. “Yes… I do. Why?”

Unshed tears, AJ refused to look up at him as he asked the next question. “How did it make you feel?”

Kevin was taken aback by that question. Though AJ refused to look at him, Kevin knew in that exact moment where he was going with that question; the tears that welled within his eyes had told him. “I remember feeling… upset, sad, scared, lost… I was upset because at the time, I thought they were being selfish. I was sad because they were my only brothers, and since I was the youngest, I’d be left behind. I was scared and felt lost because I only ever knew my life with my brothers, and now I’d have to live without them? I didn’t think it was fair.”

“Did you ever think or wish that they’d come back?” AJ asked him, a lone tear trickling down the side of his face.

Kevin closed his eyes and remained silent for a long while, “Yes.”

AJ simply nodded and wiped at his eyes, “So, it‘s normal then?… Thinking or wishing that you’d come back.”

“Alex… it is very much normal, but what are yo-”

“People think I’m stupid… for wanting and being hopeful that you’d return. I keep telling myself that you’ll be back, you’ll come back to us when you’re good and ready… and every time we enter that studio without you, it hits me… hard. I can’t help than to think if we’re or even if I’m the reason why you left. And I know… I know you’ve told us before we’re not, but whenever I ask myself why you left, I can’t help than to think it was us or me.”

“Alex…”

“That’s why I told Brian that I wanted us, just the five of us, to come back together and enjoy the holidays how we used to… before fame really hit us, before we started looking to create our own families… just the five of us.”

Kevin sighed, “Alex… you know the reason why I left was a personal decision that had nothing to do with you, or anyone for that matter. My heart just wasn’t into the career itself at that time… I had my family to think about, Kristin and Mason. My love of music will never die, but our demanding and relentless schedule kept us away from our families for too long. I couldn’t be in that situation, not while Kristin was pregnant. I continued on with Broadway and television because it was something I enjoyed that wouldn’t take me completely away from my family. Coming to that decision wasn’t the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life… to walk away from you four, the years we spent together and all the memories, you don’t think it was easy for me, do you?”

AJ shrugged, his head kept down, “No.”

“It wasn’t. That was the hardest thing I ever had to deal with, right after losing my father. But I knew… I knew that before I came to my decision, that you four would be okay. You came back to us, clean and in a good frame of mind to work, Brian’s son was old enough to travel around the world with us, Howie was able to manage his side job of real estate and this, and Nick had gotten his solo ambition out of the way… there was no reason or doubt in my mind that you guys could and would carry on just fine, without me.”

At that moment, AJ could care less that tears were now falling down freely, “We only managed… we could never do without you.” He looked up at his eldest brother, to which he received a warm smile in reply. “Will you… will you ever come back?”

Kevin remained silent, thoughtfully thinking his question over, “Honestly, I don’t even know. I loved the life I lived with you guys and doing what we did… but, at the same time, I love this new life I’ve been living for the past years. I miss holding this career with you guys, but you know you four will always and forever be apart of my life regardless. I will say this, those times I’ve rejoined, to be up on that stage and to see the reception of the fans… it’s the greatest feeling in the world. Then… when I look down at you four, as the fans chant our name… I’m reminded of all we’ve been through, what we’ve done and how far we came together. It was all worth it… every tear, bead of sweat, laughter, smile, heartache, trials and tribulations… we made it, and every moment spent with my younger brothers was and is well worth it.”

AJ tried to smile through his tears, though that wasn’t exactly the answer he was looking for. “So, you never know…” Kevin continued, “I could come back to this all with you, if and when I’m ready. But, no matter what Alex, you’ll always and forever be my little brother.”

At hearing that reply, AJ’s smile grew bigger and brighter. He rose from where he sat and held his hand out, “And you’ll always and forever be my big bro.”

Kevin looked down at the outstretched hand, then back up at AJ. “After all that, and I only get a handshake?”

AJ laughed and carefully maneuvered himself to give Kevin a hug without disturbing his wound and causing him pain, “Thank you… for saving me.” he whispered.

Kevin smirked and whispered back, “No Alex… thank you for saving me.”

~*~*~*~

The fact that they all had stayed in the hospital made the day go by painstakingly slow. When the following day had come around, they couldn’t believe that it had just been yesterday that they were all saved; what they had been through felt like it had gone on for too long, though they were only held captive for a day. Though, if you were to ask them, a day spent in captivity by armed men, not knowing if they’d let you live or not, was long enough. When Kevin was shot, Howie and Brian had began to lose hope that they’d be rescued, or if these guys would leave them, alive, once they got whatever it was that they wanted. Their captors were in it for the long haul, or so it seemed, and they thanked God that helped had arrived sooner rather than later.

“Well, well, well, you guys look like an eager bunch ready to get out of here.” Dr. Rummel mentioned as he walked into Nick and AJ’s room, finding four of the members camped out in the room.

“Yup, I even fixed up the bed for ya’ll.” Nick replied as he motioned over towards the now vacant hospital bed, finding it to be messily fixed up. The nurse had came earlier that morning to remove his IV and discharge him.

Dr. Rummel chuckled, “I see.” he focused his attention to AJ, who was sitting on his bed, still hooked up to an IV. “I haven’t even discharged you and you look like you’re ready to leave. How’s the head feeling?”

“Fine enough to get out of this place.” AJ replied curtly in a joking tone.

Dr. Rummel shook his head, “I don’t know Alex… but, if you insist that you feel alright, then I will grant you your wish. But, if there are any problems that arise, any at all, I do not want you hesitating on coming back here, do you understand?” when he seen AJ nod, he continued, “From my understanding, I was informed by your manager that you guys will be staying near here until Mr. Richardson is discharged as well. Within that time span, you are to come here if you experience any problems. If not, you’ll follow up with your regular doctor. I’ll send the nurse in here to remove your IV and discuss different things, like when your stitches will be removed, prescriptions, etcetera. Okay?”

AJ nodded, “Thank you Dr. Rummel.”

“No problem.” Dr. Rummel replied with a smirk, “Well, although we have met under unfortunate circumstances, it has truly been a pleasure having you gentlemen be under my care. I wish you all the best and a speedy recovery. I’ll see you guys in the media… take care fellas.” he bid farewell with a wink.

A chorus of “thank you” sounded out as they watched the doctor leave the room, closing the door behind him. AJ sighed, “Thank god I’m getting out of here with you guys. I fucking hate hospitals.”

“You sure you feel okay to leave?” Howie asked pointedly, wanting to make sure that his best friend wasn’t saying that he felt fine just so he could be discharged.

“Yes Mother Hen!” AJ joked, “I feel fine.”

A knock on the door had interrupted them, and before any of them could say anything, the door slowly opened, revealing Leighanne who peered in through the crack. “Hello boys!” she said excitedly.

Brian beamed brightly at the sight of his wife as they all greeted her. Leighanne opened the door further, allowing Leigh, Rochelle and Lauren to walk in behind her. They were all holding “Get Well” gifts for their significant others.

“MONKEE!!” AJ practically squealed as he held his arms out.

Rochelle simply smiled as she quickly walked over to him and closed the distance between them, allowing herself to be embraced by his arms. He pulled her in tight to him, resting his head upon her chest, listening to her heart beat. “God, I’m so happy to see you baby.”

Rochelle slightly pulled back from him and leaned down to give him a chaste kiss on his lips. “I got you something sweetie.” she pulled a stuffed monkey and a “Get Well” balloon from behind her back, holding it out to him.

AJ grinned as he accepted the gift, “Thank you baby, but you know nothing would ever come close to having my real and only monkee here with me.” his arms tightened around her waist as he gave her a deeper, longer, more meaningful kiss. “I love it… and I love you.”

Both Leigh and Leighanne handed their husbands their gifts as well, which were balloons, flowers and a personal gift from their sons, James and Baylee.

Howie admired the personal card his wife and son made for him. On the card were paint handprints of Leigh and James with a message that said, “Feel better soon! We love you Papi, always and forever!” . Although the card was covered with colorful scratches and lines, he could clearly see James name signed out, obviously hand over hand method, and Leigh’s signature right next to it. He looked up at Leigh and smiled, “I definitely feel better now.” he said as he pulled her in for a kiss.

Brian opened the card Leighanne handed to him and was greeted with a picture of Leighanne kneeling behind a smiling Baylee, her arms wrapped around him. As soon as he had opened the card though, Leighanne and Baylee’s voice chorused out, singing together along to his song, “The Perfect Fan”. The clip then ended with Leighanne saying “I love you baby” and Baylee saying “I love you daddy!”

Tearfully, Brian could only grab Leighanne and pull her in for a kiss… words at that moment couldn’t express how lucky he felt to have his wife and son, and how very lucky he was still be alive. Then, a negative thought had entered his head… he thought of how Leighanne and Baylee were supposed to join him up at the lodge after the time spent with the fellas. He clenched his eyes closed as he held onto her tighter… he couldn’t bare the thought of if his family had joined them, had they still have been in the situation they were in. It was a thought he DIDN’T want to think of about, and thanked God he wouldn’t have to face.

“I love you.” Brian whispered as he went in for another kiss, “God I love you.”

Meanwhile, Nick was sitting on the bed, Lauren standing in between his legs. They were lip-locked for what seemed like forever, until Nick finally pulled himself back. “Did you hear? AJ and I saved the day?”

Lauren laughed and nodded, “Of course I did… my baby’s a hero! I’ve got myself my own little superhero!”

“I’ll be your Superman, baby.” Nick said as he locked lips with her once again.

“Now that we’ve got this joyful reunion out of the way,” Leighanne voiced out, capturing all of their attentions. “are you guys ready to get out of here? The rest of the family is waiting for you all outside.”

The four of them looked over at each other with smiles, as if letting realization sink in… it was all over. “Yes.”

~*~*~*~

Shortly after the reunion they had with their significant others, the nurse had came in to discharge AJ and released him. Before they left the hospital, they had gone to visit Kevin, happy to see him reunited with Kristin and his baby Mason once again. They promised that they wouldn’t be too far and would wait for him before they had walked out.

As soon as they hit the waiting room, they were greeted by their family members… Denise and Tony were there for AJ. Paula, Pollyanna and John were there for Howie. Harold II, Jackie and Harold III were there for Brian. BJ, Leslie, Angel and Aaron were all there for Nick. They were all immediately wrapped in tight embraces by their respective family members, tears cascading freely down their eyes at realizing though they were held hostage and injured, they were there with them now, alive and safe.

“Oh my, look at what they did to you!” Denise cooed as she tried to expect her son’s head.

AJ quickly shied away, chuckling, “I’m fine Mom, it only looked worse than what it really was.”

Denise closed her eyes as tears sprung forth, threatening to spill over. “I‘ll never forget the fear I heard in your voice Alex.” AJ’s expression contorted in confusion, but she continued, “You had called me, and I guess you forgot to hang up. I answered, and all I could hear was static, then I heard you screaming and another man’s voice demanding you to get out of a car. It was the hardest thing to hear, to know that my baby boy was in trouble. I made Tony get on the phone with authorities and they were able to dispatch help out to you guys immediately.”

AJ remained silent, taking in the new revelation. He simply grabbed his mother and Tony and pulled them both in for a tight hug… because of his parents, they were all still alive.

Aaron tiptoed on his toes to try and look at Nick’s bandaged head. He let out a low whistle, “Guess these guys didn’t care to knock out the remaining brain cells you had left.”

Nick playfully shoved his younger brother away, “Shutup dude, I’ll still kick your ass in this condition!”

Paula caressed Howie’s face, “Cómo se siente mi amor?”

Howie smiled as he leaned into his mother’s touch, “Muy bien. Yo sólo quiero ir a casa.” he replied as they all began to walk out.

“Are you guys ready?” Jenn, their manager asked them as she led the group towards the hospital’s exit doors. “It’s a circus of media out there. If you guys don’t want to deal with it, we’ll have Q and the rest of the staff hurry you off into the waiting vehicles.”

When she received nods, she pushed the doors open, revealing a flurry of flashing lights and microphones immediately being shoved in their direction.

“What really happened up there?”

“Do you guys know the men that were behind this?”

“What do you think their motives were?”

“Where is Kevin Richardson?”

“Is Kevin okay?”

“Where will you guys go from here?”

Brian had stopped in front of the reporters, halting the other three as well. He figured he’d say a little something, to let their fans know that they were alright and will be just fine… they deserved to know that much, and hear it straight from them. He waited in silence for the crowd of reporters to settle, as Howie, AJ and Nick gathered beside him, their families backing away so they could give their word.

“We just want to thank you all for your continuous outpour of love, worry, compassion and prayers during this difficult time.” Brian spoke out. “The five of us have being through quite a traumatic experience, but we made it out alive and are now on the path of recovery. As you may already know, our eldest brother, Kevin Richardson, received a gunshot wound to his right shoulder. He was immediately rushed into emergency surgery as soon as we were rescued and is currently recovering just fine. Again, we thank you all for your continuous prayers and support during this time, and because of you all, we will surely have a speedy recovery and resume living our lives. Thank you.”

As the four men began to walk away, reporters continued to hound them with questions, demanding a little more to be said about what had happened to them. The guards quickly intervened, distancing the invading reporters from the guys and their families as they filed into the waiting vehicles.

“What are you thinking about Bri Bear?” Leighanne whispered into Brian’s ear as she snuggled up beside her husband.

Brian found himself staring out the window as the large vans drove away from the hospital, headed to the nearest hotel. “How I had the perfect trip planned out for us… in hopes to recapture and relive the good times, and how it all changed so quickly. I felt like… what we had gone through, had definitely tested our friendship with one another.”

“And…?” she drawled out slowly.

“And…” Brian smiled at the thought of his two youngest brothers being the ones that saved them all, how Kevin had sacrificed himself, how Howie remained strong within his faith. Though they were faced with a traumatic, unimaginable circumstance, it didn’t completely foil his plans of bringing them together and reconnecting. If anything, it had done just that, and definitely made their bonds with one another tighter and stronger than ever before. “We passed.”