Disclaimer: Twilight & New Moon belong to Stephenie Meyer

I continue to aggravate myself, time after time. I can’t help it. The way my family lives, it’s too damn hard! It doesn’t stop – the craving for human blood. But I have to hang on, for Alice.

The first time I saw her, it was like the sun was shining again just for me. Life got its meaning back. I’m truly happy now. The amount of love that I feel for my wife, it’s absolutely indescribable. I know that I would do anything for her – like she would, just for me.

That’s why I have given up on drinking human blood. For her.

But sometimes … sometimes it gets really hard for me to resist, even though I’ve been at it for almost half a century. The scent of those mortals, it’s so mouth-watering, so alluring. But everything for Alice right? Everything for the love of my life.

The first time Edward brought his girlfriend to our home, he had warned me to keep my distance. Who could’ve blamed him, everyone in their right mind would keep me away from their human girlfriend. I couldn’t believe the first time I heard; I thought my ears had deceived me. Edward, my brother, has fallen for a human girl. How hard must it have been for him to resist drinking from her blood, how he can manage to be around her while her blood is there- pulsing beneath her skin-, I can’t but imagine. He must really love her. He must have found his Alice.

And that I can relate to.

There is absolutely nothing that I wouldn’t do for Alice. She’s my life now. One would imagine getting tired of a person if they were around so much, I don’t believe that. I don’t think I could go on with living if she was taken away from me. If she ceased to exist. That’s why I was so scared when she left for Italy with Bella. She had to set something straight, I understand that, but the consequences – there was too much at risk. Her life.

Right then, I truly understood how Edward must’ve felt. Of course I felt absolutely horrible for trying to attack Bella on her birthday. But right then, when Alice boarded that plane, I got it. Edward feared for Bella’s life, just like I feared for Alice’s.

I understood Edward. I do feel sorry for thinking he was a lunatic before, because he acted so rash, how he wanted us to move away as quickly as possible, for Bella’s sake.

I get how strong love can be. And maybe, because of this realisation, sticking to my diet will become more natural to me. More easier. Because after all, I would do anything for the love of my life.

AN: Jasper is one of my favourite characters.. though I don't think I've portrayed him very well.I'd love to hear your thoughts!