Beep... Beep... Beep

He sat beside her bed holding her hand, stroking it gently as she laid there motionless, still, unconcious and barely hanging on.

She was alive, yes, but barely.

He'd been sitting there by her bed for hours now, though he couldn't have said how long. He'd lost count long before and the hours had seemed endless no matter how he'd tried to spend them. The doctors and nurses would come and go, whispering words of comfort into the eerie calm of the quiet morning and doing their best to offer what little support or prayer they could... but no matter how many words they said or how hard they tried, they hadn't felt the pain he'd felt. They couldn't feel what he was going through.

He'd refused to leave her side, not wanting to risk being gone when she returned to him... or worse... when she decided it was time to head on to another life.

The steady beeping of the monitors in the room and the machine-like breathing sound of the ventilator had worked him into a near trance and he briefly shut his eyes. He was hopeful for rest. He was hopeful for some small bit of solice.

His whole life lay in this hospital bed, attached to monitors and hanging onto to the last shred of existance by a mere thread. She had tubes running in and out of her body. Her arms and legs, her throat, her hand... even a tube that went through her nose and down into her stomach to relieve some of the pressure on her swollen abdomen. These tubes kept her alive, true. They helped her breathe and eased her discomfort... at least that's what the doctors had said... but they just made him feel uneasy and nauseaous.

And then there was this. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he wanted to keep his mind away from all of it, his thoughts continuously raced back to that phonecall;

"May I speak to Mr. Mark Grant?" The calm male voice had asked that evening in a seemingly innocent manner. That voice that he would now never forget... or what that phonecall would mean.

"There's been an accident Mr Grant."

The words still haunted his mind, repeating themselves over and over, again and again. That voice had delivered the worst news that any parent could never wish to hear.

He'd rushed to the hospital late that night and had been forced to wait for hours there in the awkwardness of the emergency room waiting room before they'd finally allowed him to see her.

"It doesn't look good," he'd been told by at least one doctor... probably several... he'd lost count.

That phrase along with the words 'brain damage' and 'she may never wake up' were the only things he'd really absorbed in the past 72 hours. They'd encouraged him get some sleep... they'd tried to get him to eat, they'd even pled with him to call family members and friends to come sit with him while he waited... waited for what? For life? For death? For something in between?

How can you just sit and wait for any of those things.

He couldn't bring himself to tell them that Lauren was it. She was the last and only good thing he had left in his life. She WAS his life. His wife had died when Lauren was only a child and he'd never found it in his heart to love another woman. The only love he'd ever known since then had been his daughter.

When they'd finally allowed him to see her hours after she'd arrived at the hospital, hours after he'd arrived at the hospital... his heart nearly broke at the site of her mangled body.

She was there in the bed, but she was not. That was not his daughter, that could not be her... bruised and bleeding, swollen and lifeless. Her entire body was covered by blankets (he later learned to help alleviate the shock on him). The injuries to her arms and legs were horrid... the stitches it had taken to sew up the cuts were countless.

He opened his eyes again and looked down at her face. Her eyes were still swollen shut, her head was wrapped tightly in an oversized bandage. The doctor had informed him that her head took most of the force of impact and that the damage on the inside was far worse than the damage on the outside. This a fact that he couldn't or didn't want to imagine. He reached up and gently caressed her cheek watching for the slightest sign of life... a smile, a wince, a tear. Nothing. He knew in his heart she was already gone... gone far away from this life, from this world, from his safe and loving arms. He hoped that at least wherever she was she couldn't feel any pain. He hoped at least she was with her mother now.

He'd held onto hope as long as he possibly could. They all had. But now he knew it was time to let go. The doctors had found her driver's license in her purse, the orange sticker on the back clearly visible to anyone who dared take notice. The doctors had approached him cautiously that morning and asked his permission to donate her organs. He'd signed the papers in a state of shock and sorrow only grateful for the fact that they'd discussed this beforehand, because now he could say with certainty that this was what she would have wanted.

"Maybe," she'd said one day not all that long before, completely out of the blue, "maybe if someone, somewhere had thought a little more about that decision... thought a little harder... maybe then my mother would still be alive."

And that was that. They hadn't talked about his wife, her mother often but she knew why she'd died. That was something he'd always been honest with her about. Her mom had needed a heart transplant in order to survive. She never received her miracle.

"Maybe," he whispered to her as he layed his head on the bed next to her nearly lifeless body, "maybe you're meant to be someone's miracle..."

"Someone's miracle..."

He repeated the words several times as he held her warm, sweaty hand within his. None of this made a damn bit of sense. How could a person be so warm and sweaty and feel so alive, and yet not really be very alive at all? How could her chest still rise and fall, her heart still beat, her pulse still radiate from her soft fingertips as he held them in his own sweaty hands... and yet, she was as lifeless as a human could possibly be without actually being dead.

He held her hand in his as tightly as he could and squeezed with all his might, hoping beyond all hope that she would respond. Hoping that she would sit up in the bed and tell him to "stop worrying so much"... the way she always had before. He was the worrier and she was the one who usually told him to relax.

He laid her hand gently back on the bed and smoothed the stray brown curls that hung loosely from beneath the bandage on her head, away from her ears... "I love you," he whispered as he tenderly kissed her cheek. He prayed she could hear him. Prayed that his words would somehow get through. That somehow even if she couldn't hear him, she already knew.

The words the doctor had said echoed in his mind;

"She may still be 'clincally alive'... but her brain has ceased to function.'

"Brain dead."

Oh how two small words could change a life in just a heartbeat. Just one moment. Just those two small words.

He leaned down beside her once more, not intending to leave her side until her heart beat it's last... until she breathed her final breath. Whatever it took to help him let go... he would stay until the moment he knew it was okay to let go. Once again he closed his eyes, hoping to find peace somewhere there in the darkness. An escape behind his eyelids...

Somewhere from deep within his mind's thoughts he heard singing. Beautiful singing. He breathed deeply and listened intently to the lyrics as he tried hard to focus on the child connected to the hand he'd been clutching to all day.

They were singing about her. They were singing about his daughter. His Lauren. In his entire life he'd never met another soul that could see the world the way she could see it. She saw everything in colors and portraits... in songs and poetry. She sang constantly, wrote stories and poems, painted pictures, and took thousands of amazing photographs. Their home was her studio. His once bare white walls... her gallery. He paused his thoughts momentarily and listened again, gently caressing her hand with his fingers...

The more he listened to this song the more he was sure of it. This song was her song. This song was their song. A father running out of hope, sitting on a bed in his daughter's hospital room, preparing to say goodbye to the best thing he has left in his life. He'd always been her safe place and she'd known that. A true 'daddy's girl' in every since of the word.

She was a teenager with hopes and dreams, ambitions and goals. All of those now shattered, taken away... gone with the life she'd be leaving behind. He grasped her hand more tightly in his own and kissed it tenderly. She'd left him a couple times... she'd gone on missionary trips to Africa and had just finished her freshman year of college, living in the dorms without him... but she'd always called him constantly to let him know how she was doing and sometimes just to talk. And in the end, when the trips were over, when her semester ended, when she had finished being independent, she'd always found her way back home. Always found her way back to him.

He glanced down at her again, the swelling in her face appeared less noticable today than it had been the day before... the bruising a yellowish tint, the smaller scrapes beginning to scab over. She was healing on the outside, but the inside he knew was a completely different story. She would soon be finding her way home again. To a different place. In a different sense.

This time she wouldn't be coming home to him.

The song ended after a few minutes. The lyrics had touched his heart and the voices had left him feeling calm and at peace. A feeling he hadn't felt in days. His eyes were filled with the tears he'd been holding back since the accident. He allowed them to slide down his wrinkled cheeks as he leaned forward and kissed her bruises softly. Another song filled the room and this one sounded familiar. "I never wanna hear you say, I want it that way"... where had he heard those lyrics before... why did this all sound so familiar?

Just then a nurse stepped into the room taking silent notice of his freshly falling tears. He tried his best to hide them, wipe them dry, but it was too late. She looked at him sorrowfully and laid her hand on his shoulder as he finally wept openly. They sat there for a few moments together as the music filled the room and his tears fell from his face to the sheets covering the bed and his daughter.

"I'm sorry." He finally sniffled when she handed him a tissue and he blew his nose loudly. "I just don't know how to do this... I mean... I just don't know how to do this."

She shook her head and took his hand, "It's okay Mr. Grant..." She said giving his a soft look, "no one knows how to do this."

And he knew she was right. He couldn't imagine any parent ever knowing how to let their child die. It wasn't right. It wasn't natural.

As the voices in the hall grew louder and came closer to her room he spoke again, "Who is that singing?" He finally gathered the strength to ask as he stifled another sob.

"Are they bothering you? I can ask them to leave if they're bothering you," She suggested quickly.

He shook his head quickly and stared down at his daughter once more, his hand never leaving hers, "I just want to know who it is."

"It's a famous pop group," she sighed as she walked over to the monitors and started jotting down numbers, "the Backstreet Boys... they came to visit the children in the ICU today. I really hope they're not bothering you."

He shook his head again and wiped a few more tears. He gripped her hand even more tightly. Now he knew why the music sounded so familiar. He sat back down beside her and brushed her cheek. He wished she would say something... just one word. He longed to hear her voice again... to see her shining green eyes. If she could just open them one last time and look at him... if he just knew she was aware he'd been there for her all along.

"She loved them," he whispered as the nurse continued to work around the silent pair. Her gazed fixed on the IV bag she was hanging.

"Pardon?" She asked turning to look carefully at him, not having heard what he'd said.

"She loved the Backstreet Boys."

"Oh."

"Yeah. I used to sing one of her favorite songs to her all the time when she was younger. At least I'm pretty sure it was one of their songs... I know that's what she told me."

The nurse looked towards the door and then back at the man sitting beside his daughter. Her heart went out to this man. He hadn't left her side in three days. He hadn't eaten, he'd barely had anything to drink and she knew for a fact that he hadn't slept. This was the hardest part of being a nurse... this kind of gutwrenching heartache.

"Mr. Grant?" She asked as he looked up at her through bloodshot eyes and nodded his head for her to go on, "Would you like me to ask them to sing for you... for her?" She nodded towards Lauren. It was the least she could do for this father and daughter. She'd always had a wonderful relationship with her own father... she couldn't even imagine the amount of pain he would feel if something ever happened to her.

He looked at her in surprise, "You mean... do you think they would?" He asked his tone dropping after he'd thought for a few seconds.

"I think they would," she responded.

"Then please," he replied as he once more stroked the stray hairs away from Lauren's face.

"You're going to want to hear this," he whispered in her ear as he wiped another tear from his cheek, "God I hope you can hear this..."

He quietly began humming a song he'd sung for her so many times all those years before. She'd loved that song so much, playing it daily in her bedroom and listening to it in the car on the way to school. It had been easy for him to memorize the words back then because of how often she listened to it. Though most of those words had left his mind now, the melody still flowed through him easily. It was like riding a bike... something he'd never forget.

He held her hand in his again and brought it to his lips for a gentle kiss. He imagined all those long nights throughout her childhood when she was sick or when she'd had a nightmare and he would sit with her and sing this same song and smooth those same beautiful brown curls. He had been her comfort in those moments and that song had been his guide. He gently stroked her cheek now with his fingertips. How had this happened? Now he was sitting here, humming this song to his dying daughter, the song no longer comforted her though... now it comforted him.

He looked up when he heard the door behind him open again and he watched as the nurse walked in, followed by three young men. Their faces were somber, their lips held traces of what appeared to be encouraging smiles. Maybe they knew what was happening in this room... maybe they didn't. Either way he knew this couldn't be easy for them. He felt the need to stand and say hello or shake their hands but he struggled with the idea of leaving her side for even the small amount of time it would take to do so. The nurse must have read his mind because as he went to stand up she motioned him back down and led the young men over to where he was seated.

He sighed as one by one they reached out their hands and introduced themselves. First Brian, then Howie, then Aj. They were young and innocent, the first thought to cross his mind... 'they shouldn't be here.' Shouldn't have to deal with any of this.

Someone was missing though. He was sure of this. He seemed to have remembered a young blonde that his Lauren had always touted as her 'absolute favorite.' The posters on her childhood walls, the pictures she'd taken down not all that long ago... yes definitely, someone was missing. He looked at the three of them again debating if maybe he should ask.

"My daughter loved you guys," he finally said as he looked towards each of them in turn. They smiled and nodded as they each stepped to her bed and held her hand for a few brief moments. He couldn't help but be amazed by them. None of them had to be there... none of them had to touch her or hold her hand or talk to her... but they did. They could easily turn and walk from the room and he would never think another thing about it, but they wouldn't.

"I'm sorry to ask," He finally continued, "but I just remember... weren't there more of you?" He wanted to know, wondered where the young man his daughter had always swooned over might be. She'd owned his album too, he'd remembered... she'd gone on and on for days about how her favorite guy had gone solo and about how amazing his music was. That was another cd he'd been forced to listen to repeatedly for at least a year of her young life.

"There were," the young dark haired man replied... Howie was his name. "Kevin left the group a year ago to start a family and Nick is at home in Florida because of a family emergency." He couldn't help but notice when the young man spoke about Nick he turned silently to peer down at Lauren.

"Oh," Nick... that was his name... he was her favorite. "Nick was always Lauren's favorite."

The three guys smiled and laughed lightly as Brian chimed in, "Nick is everybody's favorite."

They sat in silence for a few moments, everyone watching Lauren as if perhaps maybe if they stared hard enough she would sit up in the bed and say something to them all. If perhaps their mere presence would bring her back to life. After a few moments of that painful silence he spoke again.

"Do you think you could maybe sing for her?... I mean... you don't have to... it's just..."

Aj cut him off quickly, "We would love to sing for her."

He smiled.

Howie added, "Is there any specific song you would like us to sing?"

He nodded and sighed. "There was this song... I'm sorry if I'm wrong, but I'm pretty sure you guys sang it. She had me memorize the words years ago and I used to sing it to her all the time when she was younger..."

"Do you know the name?" Brian asked.

"No..." He replied, "but I know the melody, and some of the words... maybe that will help."

They nodded their heads for him to begin and their eyes filled with tears as they watched him hum the melody of the song gently to his daughter. The three guys turned towards each other for a few moments, as if asking permission from one another to sing the song. Finally they nodded.

"Give us just a minute," Howie said as he stood from the chair beside Lauren's bed, "We need a moment to prepare... but yes, we will sing the song for her."

The three guys walked over to the corner of the room. It'd been years since they sang this song... and when they had they'd only had small parts. They remembered the words though... or most of the words, enough to at least sing a verse and the chourus. They discussed who would sing which parts and practiced in whispers before they turned back towards Lauren and her father.

"You ready?" Brian asked looking over towards Mr. Grant. He nodded silently and squeezed his daughter's hand a little bit tighter.

The three guys stood together beside the young girls bed and Brian softly began to sing...

He watched as each of the boys started singing, taking their parts, adding their voices to the song, making it beautiful. He stared down at his daughter, laying there peacefully in the bed beside him and the tears once more began to flow from his eyes. He couldn't imagine life without her... he didn't want to and yet here he was, facing just that. The doctors were running the tests right now. Which organs would be functional... donateable? It seemed so wrong to be thinking about this, and yet, he knew this would be her choice.

Aj sang the words, his voice carrying through the room like an angel. He glanced up to watch the young man sing. His eyes were closed, his face turned towards the heavens. An amazing sense of peace was settling over him as he held his daughter's hand. Was this acceptance? Was this her way of letting him know that everything would be okay?

The words rushed back to him all at once as he sang quietly along with the young men standing around his daughter's bed. He sang to her. He sang for her. He sang to heal his heart... he sang to heal her soul. He could feel her slipping away from him... farther and farther away into the unknown. He hoped her mother was waiting for her there.

The song ended, but the tears had just begun. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and looked up to find the three young men wiping theirs as well. He passed the box of kleenex their way and thanked them for the gift they'd given his daughter. He could feel in his heart that her soul had been healed.

A knock on the door pulled them all from their tears as her doctor poked his head in to ask if he could have a moment with Lauren and her father. The young men nodded their heads and shook his hand once more, offering their condolences and prayers before they walked quietly from the room. Their shoulders were slumped, their eyes red. He hoped and prayed this hadn't been too much for them.

The doctor sat down beside him and gave him a weak smile. "We got the test results," He whispered quietly. Everyone whispered in her room... as if they were trying their best not to disturb her unending sleep, or as if maybe they thought she shouldn't be hearing the things they were discussing.

He nodded.

"Her heart, lungs, kidneys, and liver are all viable. She can potentially save as many as six lives." He rested his hand gently on the man's back. "This is an amazing gift you're giving."

"I know," it was all he could think to say as he nodded his head and wiped the tears that continued to pour steadily down his cheeks, "Oh God don't I know."

The doctor stood and walked towards her bed. He checked her bandages and covered her gently back up with the blankets. "We are checking the registries now. As soon as we know who can recieve the organs, we will begin the operation to harvest them."

He inhaled a sob. He knew what this meant.

"This is what she would have wanted," he reminded himself as he held her hand more tightly than ever. "This was what she always wanted."

"She's going to save someone's life," the doctor said once more with a reassuring glance before he left the room.

"She's going to be someone's miracle."

"Ugh!" The young blonde moaned rolling over in his bed and throwing a pillow across the room at the television set. "Niiiiiick!" he whined as his older brother stepped in from the hallway where he'd been talking on the phone for the past few minutes.

"What's wrong Air?" Nick asked, concerned at his brother's sudden change in attitude. Despite his condition, he was usually chipper and smiling.

"Make Angel turn this crap off... puhlease!"

Nick laughed as he turned his head towards where his youngest sister sat engrossed in the show on television set in the corner of the room. Angel had taken it over when she arrived the night before and he'd just about swear they'd watched at least fifty episodes of Grey's Anatomy since that time.

Yep, it was an all out Derek Shepard, Meredith Grey marathon up in room 421A.

"Angel," he muttered softly walking over to where she was sitting fully engrossed in her latest episode, "I think Aaron is tired of your favorite show here. How about watching something else?" As the words exited his mouth he took notice of his young brother's posture from across the room. He was slumped back against his pillows, his face pale and his eyes drowsy. "On second thought, " he added as he grabbed her hand and led her to the door fishing a $20 bill quickly out of his wallet, "Go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat."

"Ewwwww Nick," she protested, making a disgusted face at the mere idea, "everyone knows hospital food sucks!"

He laughed as he continued shoving her out the door, "Whatever Ang, if you don't want to eat downstairs, try the McDonalds down the road."

"Now that's more like it!"

"Hey Angelfish!" Aaron called sleepily from his spot on the bed, "bring me back some french fries or something... I don't know how much more of this damned hospital food I can take!"

"Bring Aaron back some fries Angel, he might be able to eat a couple!" He called out as she gave him a thumbs up over her head and disappeared around the corner of the hallway.

Nick walked over and sat down in the uncomfortable hospital chair beside his brother's bed. He was exhausted... Aaron was clearly exhausted... hell, they all had the right to be exhausted. They'd been there in that very hospital room for over two weeks now, two weeks at the very top of the donor list and still, nothing.

"I wonder where my hot intern's at?" Aaron mumbled as he stared blankly at the television set that Nick had flipped off moments before.

"Likely between the 'A' and the 'T' Aaron."

Aaron frowned at Nick and shot him the finger. "What are you the grammer patrol? Shut up!"

Nick laughed, "What do you mean anyway? Your hot intern?"

"Well," Aaron replied motioning towards the television, "That Denny guy on Angel's show over there..."

"Wait... you know their names now?" Nick asked giving him a odd look and rolling his eyes at his baby brother.

"Nick seriously! I'm trying to talk... and how the hell could I NOT know their names? Angel only watched that season three times this morning alone!"

Nick laughed, "point taken."

"Anyway," Aaron continued, "that Denny guy... he was in the hospital for a long time, waiting on a transplant and he got the hot intern. Where's mine?"

Nick laughed again. "I don't know Aaron. You want me to ask Dr. Dasota when he comes in next time? Maybe he can find you one."

"Heck yeah!" He responded with a forced grin, "I mean there's gotta be a reason I'm lying here in this bed dying right? I should at least get the hot girl!"

Nick nodded as Aaron grew silent. He'd asked himself that question at least a thousand times and he'd yet to come up with a good answer. There was no good reason he could think of that an otherwise healthy, happy 20-year-old young man would be lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to tubes and wires, being pumped full of medications and fluids, in need of a brand new liver.

He looked over at Aaron again. He could see the young man's eyes were growing heavy and he reached for his hand as he drifted off into a peaceful sleep. At least he hadn't been in too much pain these last few days. Not even a week ago the pain had been relentless, unending and completely unnerving. They had all feared the worse for their brother. His skin was yellow, his body was shutting down and his doctors were stumped. They couldn't come up with a reasonable explanation as to why Aaron's liver was shutting down and yet, it was. Aaron had blamed himself... too much alcohol and bad behavior. But Nick, his friends, and even his doctors had known better. It would take a lot more than a teenage boys stupidty and a few years of light partying... even if some nights would have qualified as hard partying... to destroy someone's liver.

Nick didn't understand. How could someone so young, someone in the prime of life... be dying.

He watched his brother sleeping and gently brushed the blonde strands away from his face. He'd prayed to God so many times for a miracle for Aaron. Today was no exception.

Nick had barely drifted off to sleep when a loud noise from behind him suddenly jarred him from his dreams.

"Shit! Fuck! Ouuuuuch!"

He shot his head around in a hurry to see his sister Leslie standing in the doorway of the hospital room, carrying a bag of McDonalds food and cursing like a sailor.

"Shhhhh! Leslie!" He hissed at her pointing towards the sleeping figure passed out in the bed beside him, "you're gonna wake him up!"

She rubbed her knee and cringed as he stood and walked over towards where she stood.

"Sorry," she hissed back at him, thrusting the bag of food into his arms before hobbling pitifully over to the chair beside the bed, "I banged my damn knee on the door frame."

"Do you have to use that kind of language all the time?" He asked shooting her a dirty look as he opened the bag and pulled out a container of french fries. She stuck out her tongue at him and went back to inspecting the damage she'd done to her knee. "Where's Angel by the way? She left like two hours ago to get this stuff for us and well... she never came back."

Leslie rolled her eyes at him.

"You seriously think that sending Angel Charisma Carter out into the streets of Florida in the hopes that she will actually go to a McDonalds and pick up food for her ailing brother is a good idea?"

Nick chuckled slightly and shook his head. "I see your point."

"She called me about 30 minutes ago from Britton Cinema's to say she couldn't get your food because she... get this... met a guy in the hospital parking lot and was taking him out to a movie! The hospital parking lot Nick! Is there anywhere that girl can't, er, won't find a man?"

Nick shook his head again and collapsed onto the small couch in the corner of the room.

"You tired?" She asked eyeing him curiously as she stuffed a couple of her own fries into her mouth. "You look tired."

He nodded. It had been a long few weeks for sure. He'd left the hospital only four times in past 14 days, twice to go to meetings for the Backstreet Boys, the other two times to shower at home and sleep in his own bed. Other than those times he'd felt it necessary to stay by his brother's side.

He'd been shocked when Aaron had called him that Friday afternoon just two short weeks before. He'd been sick... really, really sick and a friend had called an ambulance to take him to the hospital. Nick had shrugged it off, imagining in his young and still often childish mind that there was no way it could really be anything serious. He'd arrived at the hospital thirty minutes after Aaron, having not really hurried to get there, to find that he'd been rushed to ICU and was in critical condition.

Even thinking of the words "critical condition" made him wince. The nurse had walked him through the halls to a small room marked "Intensive Care Waiting Area" and she'd left him there with the assurance that she would be back in a few minutes to let him know when he could see his brother. He'd remained there, alone in that room for three hours before anyone had come back to tell him what was going on. He'd never been more terrified in his life, spending those hours pacing back and forth, crying, and praying to God that Aaron would be okay.

Finally the nurse had returned, apologizing profusely for keeping him waiting. The diagnosis -- "Acute Liver Failure." Aaron, it seemed had been sick for about a week, suffering from weakness, exhaustion and nausea. Like just about anyone else would have done he chalked it up to a virus or the flu and took over the counter medicines in the hopes whatever it was would go away. It didn't go away though... it only got worse.

That morning when he'd woken up confused and disoriented his best friend and roomate had called an ambulance.

Nick shuddered as he remembered seeing his brother for the first time that day. He couldn't believe it was the same Aaron he'd seen only a few short weeks before, so full of life and energy, playing jokes and having fun. This wasn't Aaron at all. He was lying in his ICU bed motionless, the doctors having put him in an induced coma. His body was a yellowish tint and his legs and arms were covered in small bruises. His face was pale and his eyes looked hollow. His abdomen was swollen as well, giving the illusion that he weighed a good 20 pounds more than Nick knew he did.

That was the day Nick began his vigil. He'd never wanted to leave Aaron's side at all, but circumstances beyond his control had forced him to go those four times.

He took another french fry from the bag in his hand and fought back the tears that threatened to fall as he glanced over at the bed across the room. Leslie was there beside their brother now, holding his hand and fighting back her own tears as she gently caressed his sweaty cheeks.

He remembered the moment the doctor had told them his only hope for survival would be a liver transplant. The look on Aaron's face had broken his heart into a million pieces and he wasn't sure he would ever be able to put it back together. That look of fear and terror, of sadness and misery had an impact on Nick that he knew would stick with him for the rest of his days. He'd asked Aaron later why he was so afraid and he'd responded with a shrug of his shoulders, turning away and pretending he was tired enough to sleep. Nick knew better though. He'd continued to question Aaron over the course of the following days and had finally managed to get his young brother to open up to him. Aaron, it turned out, didn't want to think about a transplant at all... he knew in his heart that in order for him to get a new liver, someone else had to die. He'd told Nick repeatedly that he couldn't pray for that or ask for it because it just felt wrong. He could't ask for someone else to die in order for him to live. He'd told Nick that if it was God's will he would be eternally grateful... but that he would never beg for something he wasn't worthy of.

Nick wiped at the tears furiously as he tried to hide them from his sister. He hated all of this. Hated watching his brother... his only brother... going through this mess. There was nothing at all about this that was fair. Aaron had done nothing at all to deserve this kind of life.

Nick looked up again as the door of Aaron's hospital room opened and his doctor stepped quietly in. He took note of the young man sleeping soundly in the bed and smiled.

"We've got a liver."

"Potential Donor Recipient List"

He'd read the words at least a dozen times as he sat there beside his daughter's now empty hospital bed. He stared down at the creases in the blankets, at the stains on the sheets from where the nurses had cleaned her wounds one last time. He wanted to crawl into the bed and cover up with those blankets and breathe in the last remaining memories of his beautiful Lauren. Instead, he just sat there alone by her empty bed and stared at those blankets and read that list... over and over, again and again.

"Heart," The list began and was followed by words that took his breath away, "33-year-old female, wife and mother of two." He sighed as those words echoed in his mind. This was the only information he would receive, no name, no location, just age and those tiny details... but that was enough for him.

He wished with all his heart that he could run to Lauren now and tell her stories of the great miracles she was giving on this day. He wished he could tell her that her heart was going to save someone's mother. Her mother hadn't gotten a chance, but because of her, someone else's would. He stared down at the empty bed again and blinked back the tears that were stinging his eyes... if only she could know.

The three other recipients listed beneath the heart recipient;

Lungs -- 45-year-old female, wife and mother of one.

Kidneys -- 15-year-old female.

Liver -- 20-year-old male.

As he read the information and tried his best to absorb it all, his heart swelled with pride for his daughter, and sadness for those individuals. The thoughts of his wife's long battle penetrated his thoughts. Some of them were so young... young like Lauren had been. He wished they could know his daughter. She may very well be saving four lives and though the trade off for him would never seem fair... would never BE fair or feel right, he knew in his heart that she would be proud, and because of that, HE was proud.

The tears flowed freely as he laid the paper on the bedside stand and sat down on the side of the bed. He scooped up the stuffed lion she'd carried with her from the time she was just a small child. He closed his eyes tight and pressed it gently to his face. It still smelled like her. The scent was a welcome release from the medicinal smell of the hospital room. While everything else in the room reminded him of the pain and agony of the last three days, that lion reminded him of an entire lifetime of memories and joy. That lion was his one release from the reality he was being forced to face.

He opened his eyes when he heard the door open behind him and watched as her nurse slowly shifted her way into the room. He was thankful she had been Lauren's nurse. This young woman, not too much older than his daughter, had been an amazing comfort over the past three days without even trying. She'd always let him know what she was doing, what types of the tests and procedures his daughter would undergo and when they'd come to wheel her back for her final surgery... to wheel her back for her death... it was this nurse who had offered to allow him to stay in her room and wait instead of sitting in a waiting room surrounded by other families. Perhaps she knew what he knew... that he didn't need to be surrounded by hopeful people when for him, hope had run out.

"Is there anything I can get for you Mr. Grant?" She asked as she made her way over to the bed and sat down on the chair beside him.

He shook his head, "No. I'm alright for now."

She nodded as she rested a hand upon his shoulder, "The surgery will be over soon and we'll bring her back here for you to see her. Until then, just let us know if you need anything." He nodded his head in response, refusing to look at her for fear his tears would overcome him. She turned and walked from the room once more, leaving him alone again with his thoughts... alone with this empty bed.

He pressed the lion to his face once more, trying to escape the bitter reality that had invaded his already less than perfect life. This was all so different for him... so difficult. With his wife all those years ago, he'd sat beside her bed as she'd taken her final breath of air. He'd held her hand and said goodbye as her heart ticked slowly and painfully to a silent standstill. He'd never left his wife's side... not until the moment they'd wheeled her down to the morgue. It had been painful, but it had been the only way he'd known at the time to make it real, and he'd loved her enough to sit by her and hold her as she left this world for the next. His daughter's death would be different though. She'd been wheeled out of her hospital room, her chest still rising and falling with steady breaths, her heart still ticking a steady beat and she would be returned to him completely gone. He ached to hold her hand and be with her as she let go of this life, just as he'd done with his wife... but he couldn't do that.

The thought that pained him most as he sat in that small room, beside that empty bed was that she would be returned to him in a little while without a heart. That he would say goodbye to a body that no longer encased the spirit of his daughter. In his own heart he'd felt her spirit had flown away days before, but in his mind it still hurt to know he wouldn't get that real goodbye.

"Heart," He read it once more as he picked the paper up from off the bed... "33-year-old female... wife and mother of two."

If only she knew the miracles that were coming from the sadness of letting her go. He stared up towards the ceiling and closed his eyes, offering a silent and private prayer to God. He smelled the lion one last time as a feeling of comfort and peace washed over him...

Then again... maybe she did know.

"Donor Information"

Nick Carter sat in the same uncomfortable chair he'd occupied for days beside his younger brother's now empty hospital bed. He glanced down at the sheet of paper in his hands and then over to the couch where his sisters Angel and Leslie were sleeping soundly, curled up lovingly in each others arms. He smiled at the site of them before rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands and reading over the words on the paper once more.

There was a list of information about blood type, height, weight, liver function and a variety of other hospital terms that he only vaguely understood from the two weeks Aaron had spent in the ICU, but the words that caught his eye and stung his heart the most were the ones he couldn't stop going back to... "19-year old female."

Nick knew how much Aaron had dreaded the idea that someone else would have to die for him to receive his new liver... now here they were, faced with the realization that not only had someone else had to die for his little brother to live, but that it had been a 19-year-old girl. Only a year younger than Aaron... her entire life ahead of her. He couldn't help but wonder how she'd died... what her family had gone through to make such an amazing and unselfish decision. He shuddered at the thoughts and pushed them back into the depths of his mind. He only knew that he was grateful to them.

He stared down at the empty bed beside him and struggled to hold back the tears that threatened to fall from his eyes. He hated to admit that he'd began thinking the worst when it had come to Aaron's condition and the possibilities of him ever getting out of the hospital. Staring down at the paper again, he now felt ashamed that he had ever prayed so hard for his brother's miracle. Thankful, no doubt... but still ashamed. He couldn't help but wonder how God could choose to answer those prayers. Then again, he'd always believed that everything in life happened for a reason and this was no exception to the rule. It just hurt him to think that someone so young had to die for any reason.

He knew it hurt Aaron too. His brother had seemed to be ready and willing to accept whatever fate God was handing him. He'd never once heard Aaron cry or whine about his condition and he'd never once heard his brother blame God. He'd been angry at first, sure, but more at himself and the things he felt he'd done in his life to deserve the position he'd been put in. But over the weeks spent in the hospital Nick had watched silently as anger turned into acceptance and acceptance into peace.

He'd sat beside Aaron as he'd planned out his funeral. He'd hated doing it and at first had encouraged Aaron to stop, insisting that he would be okay and that it wasn't necessary, even when he wasn't so sure of that himself. Aaron hadn't backed down though and before long he'd had Nick at his side, begrudgingly making arrangements and carrying on long conversations about how things should go if, or when his time ran out. It had pained Nick greatly to sit by and watch... moreso to help, but he knew Aaron needed it. He smiled as he recalled one small conversation they'd had a few days earlier...

"Hey Nick," Aaron called from his bed across the room where he was sitting up and eagerly jotting down notes in what Nick had come to know as his "funeral plan" journal.

"Yeah Air?" Nick questioned glancing over at him and rolling his eyes slightly when he saw him flipping through songs on his Ipod and taking down more notes.

"I'm just thinking about songs I should play at my funeral... know any good ones?"

Nick sighed and stood from his seat on the couch, walking over and plopping himself down on the bed beside him. "Let's see what you have so far," he suggested, stealing the notebook from his brother's lap and flipping through the sheets of paper. He paused momentarily and couldn't help but chuckle when he came across one of Aaron's song ideas.

"'Only the Good Die Young' bro?" Nick questioned, raising his eyebrows in a scowl. He could only imagine the looks on his sister's faces, not to mention their mother's face, if he ever dreamed of suggesting they play that song at Aaron's funeral. Written in his funeral journal or not!

"Yeah man! How awesome would that be!?" Aaron looked at him with his own eyebrows raised and slapped him on the back of the head when he only rolled his eyes, "don't be such a damned fuddy-duddy Nick!"

"Uh huh Aaron... "Come out Virginia, don't make me wait, you Catholic girls start much too late" Nick crooned as he took his brother into a headlock and gave him a gentle noogie. "I can just see the looks on the faces in the crowd."

"Ohh... it'll be a big crowd too!" Aaron mused hopefully, "And now that you mention it... you're SO gonna be the one singing the song!"

Nick scoffed and gave him a noogie a little harder, "I never mentioned it dude... and I'm SOOO not!"

He couldn't help but laugh at the memory of the conversation. The only person he had ever known that could make planning a funeral entertaining was his beloved 'Airhead.' He stared down at the paper once more, silently thanking God that he didn't have to think about it now. At least not right now. He thanked God that he wasn't going to have to find out if he'd ever really stand up at Aaron's funeral and sing that song. Although, in his heart he knew he would have done it, jeers, laughter, beatings from his female family members and all.

Aaron's nurse poked her head into the room and he nodded and motioned her inside. "He's out of surgery," she stated as she went about changing the sheets on his bed and preparing things for what Nick could only imagine would be his brother's return to his room. He held his breath as he waited for her to give him the rest of the information he knew she carried... "Everything went great and you should be able to see him soon."

He smiled and stood, walking quietly over to wake up his sisters and tell them the good news. As had been the case the entire day, and as Nick was certain, to the befuddlement of all of the nurses and doctors in the hospital they sat together quietly in the corner, calm and reserved, just as they had done when they heard a liver had been found, and prayed. It had been Aaron's one request... no huge celebrations, no partying, no hoopla. He had asked them long before they'd ever known he'd get a liver to respect his wish to just live in the moment and say quiet prayers of thanksgiving and of comfort for himself... and for the family of the donor.

Whoever that 19-year-old female may be.

He'd only just drifted off to sleep when they wheeled his daughter into the room after her surgery. He hadn't slept in days and the nurses tried their best not to disturb him as the shifted her lifeless body from the stretcher back onto her hospital bed. He stirred slightly with the movement and blinked his eyes as he lifted his head.

It took several moments for the realization to settle into his body. She was there in the bed beside him, but she was really gone now... just a shell of the beautiful girl he'd raised and loved more than life itself. He reached out his hand tentatively and stroked her cheek softly. The nurse gently covered her with the fresh blankets before turning to leave the room, whispering as she walked away, "Let us know if you need anything at all... we'll be right out at the nurses station. And when you're ready," she paused briefly, trying her best to fight back the emotions that even nurses at times couldn't help but show and then continued, "when you're ready... they'll come get her."

He sighed as she left the room. He knew who 'they' were and he knew where they'd be taking her. He'd been through this part once before and it didn't make it any easier. He stood and looked down at her face. She looked so peaceful... so beautiful, even in the midst of all the pain and suffering she could still take the very breath right out of his lungs. He remembered the first time he'd ever held her in his arms, right after her birth. She'd been so small then and so frail and so incredibly beautiful to him. He'd felt as if anything he did could break her and so he'd been so careful with her. If only he'd been more careful that night when he'd told her she could take his car and go out with her friends... if only he'd realized then that even big girls can break.

The tears fell from his eyes as he moved to find her hand beneath the blankets. He dared not look at the scars he knew were hiding there... he didn't think his own heart could take the knowledge that hers was really gone. The surgeons had stitched up the wounds on her head and unwrapped the bandages, he hair now flowed freely over her face and cascaded down onto the pillow beneath her. He gently ran his fingers through her curls as he sat back down on the chair beside her. He felt as if his body would give way at any moment. The weight of the world lay on his shoulders and if he didn't sit down he would surely go crashing to the floor in a heap of exhaustion and emotions.

He told her that he loved her, and he told her how proud he was of her. He held her hand and gently sobbed as he did his best to say goodbye. It didn't feel right and it didn't feel fair... but he knew it had to be done. He could never forgive himself if he didn't say goodbye.

He sat there in silence for a few moments, trying to think of the best way to let her go and finally it dawned on him. He laid his head on her chest... he knew it couldn't hurt her now, she was far away from all the pain... and he held her hand tightly in his arms. He looked up at her face and felt the tears as they fell from his cheeks and splashed onto the blanet below. He closed his eyes and began to sing...

His words were soft, his voice not quite perfect, but the intent with which he sang his song was absolutely beautiful. He held her hand and sang her soul right out of her body and up into the heavens where he hoped that she could hear his voice... where he hoped she knew he loved her.

He slowly finished the song and lifted his head. He opened his eyes and wiped away the tears as he stood. The same overwhelming sense of peace and calmness he'd felt several times that day began to fill his heart. He brushed the hair from her cheeks once more and gently kissed her forehead.

He kissed her one last time before grabbing the lion from the bed and walking towards the door of her room. He opened it slowly and glanced out into the hall, nodding towards the nurse who had been waiting for his word. She nodded back with a sobering smile and gestured to the man who'd been standing beside her. He came into the room and slowly lifted his daughter gently onto a stretcher and wheeled her towards the door.

"Can I just..." he said as he followed the man out into the hallway... "Can I be the one to cover her face?"

The young man nodded in surprise and stepped aside to allow the father a spot beside his daughter's head. He couldn't help but feel a rush of emotion for this poor man, knowing this situation could never be easy. He watched as he leaned down towards her and kissed her softly on the cheek. He felt his own tears stinging his eyes as he watched the man flip the sheet up over his daughter's head before he stepped aside himself and allowed him to wheel her away.

Mr. Grant stood there silently in the middle of the hallway, watching for a few moments before he silently followed as they wheeled his daughter away for the very last time...

"My beautiful baby girl..." he whispered as they climbed onto the elevator and headed down to the morgue... "you're someone's miracle now..."

He stood in front of her coffin as the cool rain fell from the morning sky and soaked his face, mingling silently with his warm tears and hiding the emotions from the people around him. He shivered painfully in spite of the warm layers he'd made sure to wear, knowing a cold winter storm was brewing in the air. He sighed as he listened to her two best friends singing the beautiful song they'd choosen to honor her with this day. There was never a truer song to describe the way he felt about his daughter after her death. She was more than a hero to him though... she was his life... and now she was gone.

He would never forget those three days in the hospital with her. It had been nearly a week since he said goodbye and ushered her down to that lonely morgue before walking out of the hospital to a new life, a life without her. Those memories still haunted his nightmares and that phonecall -- the one from the night of the accident -- that call played itself over and over in his mind. Had he known the fate that awaited her that night he would have never let her go.

He stared down at the paper he held in his hands and smiled slightly at the picture on the page. There she was, whole and beautiful, staring up at him beneath the words he never in a million years imagined he'd read in reference to his own flesh and blood.

And beneath those words the quote he'd found on one of her projects shortly after her death.

"That there are no random acts. That we are all connected. That you can no more separate one life from another than you can separate a breeze from the wind... It is because the human spirit knows, deep down, that all lives intersect. That death doesn't just take someone, it misses someone else, and in the small distance between being taken and being missed... lives are changed. -- Mitch Albom

He'd paused stunned and read the quote again and again. He couldn't help but wonder if somehow his daughter had known... known more than he could ever have imagined.

The service had been a beautiful tribute to his daughter's spirit and life. The entire church had been decorated with her favorite white and red roses and her friends, both from high school and from college had shared photographs and memories of the fun times they'd had with her. There were photo albums and scrapbooks lining the altar and a beautiful photograph one of her best friends had taken two weeks before her death was placed in a frame and was sitting right on top of her closed casket. Her beautiful green eyes shining brightly, her smile... her beauty.

He'd struggled more that day than any other moment in this entire tragedy. When the time had come to close the lid on his daughter's life... he couldn't do it. He'd broken down completely for the first time and had to be comforted by the funeral home director and one of his cousins. He'd never imagined that being the hardest part but it had been... he knew the moment that casket was closed, he would never ever be able to see her again. A solidification of his very worst fear. The way her dimples showed when she smiled at him. The way her eyes shined when she told him of her latest adventures... the way her beautiful curls bounced around when she was happiest. He'd never see any of those things again.

He shifted slightly on his feet as he felt the moist ground sink below him. He watched as the pall barers helped lower her body into the cold, wet earth. He didn't have the strength to move in and help them... he could barely stand on his own two feet.

The only thing bringing comfort to him these days were the letters he'd received from each hospital thanking him for his gift and sending their condolences. Those letters had revealed little information other than to say each recipient was doing well. He would not get to meet any of them for a long time... if ever, but his heart ached to know who his daughter had saved. Whose lives his Lauren was living on in.

He sighed as he watched the guests one by one step up and toss a single rose onto her casket below. He wiped the tears from his eyes and slowly sauntered over to drop his own. He couldn't make sense of any of this... the feeling of peace and comfort was with him every now and then but other times the pain seemed so strong and real and endless that he would gladly climb into the grave beside his daughter and accept eternal sleep. He just had to keep reminding himself that life was for living and his daughter's life had not been meaningless.

He had to remind himself everyday that his daughter was still with him... in heart... in soul... in spirit.

She was a hero... his hero.

Nick squinted against the harsh rays of Florida sunlight as he pulled his car up to the front doors of the hospital and quickly hopped out to help the nurse with his brother's bags. He grabbed his suitcase and the five or six other bags full of various hospital supplies and loaded them quickly into trunk before turning towards the door again to watch as another nurse, Aaron's favorite nurse, wheeled him out into the warmth of this beautiful winter day.

Thank God for Florida winters.

He couldn't help but smile when he saw the look on Aaron's face. It was a look of pure joy and contentment. One that could come only from seeing the daylight and feeling the warm breeze against your face after spending nearly 5 weeks in the hospital... 2 and half of those weeks in the Intensive Care Unit... and finally receiving a brand new liver.

"My God!" Aaron exclaimed as the nurse helped him stand from his wheelchair and shift his weight over to the front seat of Nick's Mercedes, "I never thought I'd see the light of day again!"

Nick smiled and nodded as he helped Aaron rotate his legs into the car and buckle up. He was still incredibly sore and needed help getting around and manuevering his body. Nick knew how much Aaron hated having to be helped though so he tried his best to let him do most everything for himself.

"It's a beautiful day dude," He mused as he ruffled his brother's hair before closing the door and thanking the nurse for helping them out. He walked around to the driver's side of the car and hopped in. He knew what Aaron meant though. Those weeks had seemed like an eternity. Nick himself had only ended up leaving the hospital a total of 10 nights out of the 33 his brother had been there. He looked up at the large building looming in the distance as the two of them drove away. He definitely would not miss that place at all.

"What do you want to do first?" Nick asked Aaron in the hopes that he would think up something enjoyable. He knew how boring the past week or so had been for him and he wanted Aaron to enjoy his first few days out of the hospital... even if they couldn't do anything wild and crazy.

"Ice cream?" Aaron questioned looking over at Nick and raising his eyebrows.

"Ice cream it is then!" He replied with a smile.

He pulled into the nearest Dairy Queen drive-thru and ordered them both a banana split blizzards. Aaron hadn't been able to eat much during his hospital stay, especially when he was waiting on his liver and had been on a special diet that limited his salt and protein intake... now, however, he could eat whatever his heart desired and Nick would get him whatever that was.

He pulled out of the parking lot and headed towards his ocean front home. Aaron would be staying with him for a while as he healed and Nick was looking forward to having him as a house guest. He'd missed his brother terribly in the past when he'd gone on tours with the Backstreet Boys and even more when the two of them were touring at separate times and hadn't seen each other for over a year. It was nice to have some time off and to be able to take care of his brother... the way his mother and father should have been doing.

He shook the thoughts of his parents away... not wanting to ruin this perfect day by thinking about the two of them. He glanced over again to where Aaron was sitting, looking longingly out the window at the passing scenery.

"What're you thinking about Air?" He asked, noting the solemn look on his young brother's face.

"Lots of things... too many things I guess." Aaron answered without really saying exactly what it was he was thinking about.

Nick had ideas. The young man had a lot on his mind, a lot of weight riding on the next few weeks... the next few years even. He'd received his liver, yes, but that was only half the battle. Rejection, at least acute rejection was looking unlikely at this point, that usually occured somewhere in the first two weeks after transplant, but long term rejection was always still a possibility. Infection was his greatest threat now and the major risk of infections occured somewhere in the 1st and 2nd months following surgery. He had been warned several times that it was not unusual for patients to experience at least one hospitalization sometime within the first few months following surgery... he didn't want that to happen.

Nick glanced over at him again to find him opening up his bag of medications and digging slowly through them. He frowned at the look on Aaron's face.

"What's wrong?" He asked truly feeling that he already knew the answer... just wanting to hear Aaron say it out loud.

"How am I ever going to do this Nick?" Aaron asked with an exasperated sigh as he leaned back in his seat and tossed the bag to the floor. The list of medications covered page upon page of the notebook Aaron carried around with instructions for day to day care. There were medicines to prevent rejection, steroids, and immunosuppressants to prevent a variety of different illnesses that could now be fatal to the once healthy young man. He was even taking baby aspirin to prevent blood clots from forming. The list seemed never ending and most of the medications were taken multiple times a day.

"You can do it Aaron," Nick said giving him a reassuring pat on the knee... "I'll be there to help you."

"But not forever Nick," he interupted, leaning his head back against the seat and closing his eyes. "What if I forget one... just one day... it could kill me!"

Nick knew the drugs that Aaron was speaking about. His anti-rejection drugs... he had to take at least one everyday for the rest of his life. Missing a dose could have fatal consequences.

"You'll remember them."

He sighed, "Not like I have a choice."

Nick shook his head and flipped on the radio in hopes of taking Aaron's mind off the things that were worrying him most. There was so much more to worry about too. Because of the risks of rejection and infection, Aaron would be in and out of the doctor's office several times a week for the next few months, he would be hospitalized for any fever or illness for the next year or so, there was a risk of diabetes and high blood pressure because of his medications and of course he would not be allowed to drink alcohol... that had been perhaps the least difficult pill for Aaron to swallow but as a young kid in the prime of life who liked to party... Nick knew that one was tough.

By the time they pulled into the driveway about an hour later, Aaron was fast asleep in the passenger seat. He looked so peaceful it pained Nick to have to wake him up. He prodded him gently in the shoulder and laughed when Aaron told him to go away and let him sleep.

"We're home Airhead." He watched as Aaron rubbed his eyes sleepily and looked around before unbuckling his seat belt and opening his car door. "Where do you want to go? Inside or out back?"

"Hmm..." Aaron pondered momentarily before answering the question, "Let's go out back... I wanna sit by the water and think."

Nick nodded and helped him slowly out of the car. The two of them made the painful trek to the dock together and he settled Aaron into a cushioned lounge chair in the shade. "You need anything?" He asked and waited for Aaron to shake his head no. "Well holler if you do... I'm gonna get your bags out of the car."

Aaron watched as his big brother sauntered back towards the front of the house. He had so many thoughts swarming through is mind... so many new worries and fears. This was the hardest thing he'd ever gone through. Despite all of his fears though, the one biggest thing weighing on his mind was that young girl. The 19-year-old girl who's liver he now held within his body.

Someone he didn't know, who he'd never even met had given him a new chance at life and he wanted to thank her... to know her... but she was gone. It just seemed so unfair. He stared out across the water and tried to take his mind off the things to come. He loved sitting by the water because it seemed to calm him more than any other activity.

Suddenly it hit him. Without this liver he wouldn't be able to sit here at all anymore. There would be no more ice cream stops with his brother. No more long drives in the car, no more sunsets or jetsking on the bay... there would be no more just sitting by the ocean...

There would be no more him.

Life certainly wouldn't be easy... but it would definitely be worth it. He would make it worth it, for her.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his ipod. Music was his other favorite mode of comfort in life. He flipped it on and hit 'random' before leaning back in his chair and allowing the seabreeze to wash over his entire body. He smiled when he heard the music of the first song... how fitting...

That was him... sitting there by the ocean, looking out at the water. New life... new health... new opportunities...

So damn lucky.

Mark Grant stood in the gallery of the large convention center UNOS had choosen for their annual donor reunion. He'd been one of the first guests to arrive and had spent the last several hours helping the committee set up for the big event. He couldn't help but smile as he glanced around the room, taking in all of the decorations and witnessing the miracle of the entire ordeal as it came together before his eyes.

He'd waited three long years for this day, and as nervous as he might have been, he was far more excited. Excited to meet them. Excited to know them.

He walked slowly along the gallery wall of Lauren's artwork and photography and sighed as the memories came flooding back to him. He wished more than anything that she could be there to see her artwork displayed in public. It had always been a dream of hers to someday become a famous artist... she would have been so proud. He was proud.

He stood beside one of her larger photographs, a beautiful photo of a bald eagle taking flight, and stared at it for a long while. She'd captured that photo 10 years before when she was only 12 years old and they'd gone on a camping trip together. He'd remembered the day he developed the photos and saw it for the first time. That was the moment he realized her talent went far beyond a 12-year-old talent... the first time he realized that she saw life through completely different eyes than most children her age. He'd always been afraid she'd lose that perspective, but it was clear he had nothing to worry about. She never changed. He ran a finger across the photo and sighed. He missed her more everyday.

He turned to another wall and took in the sight of the 10 beautiful black and white portraits hanging in a row. Lauren's photo was the third to the left and she looked more than beautiful in it. He'd choosen his favorite photo of her... from her high school graduation. She'd always said it was the happiest day of her life and it showed in the photo. Her smile as wide as the Mississippi River... her eyes as bright as the sun. He wiped a tear from his cheek as he stood there for a moment trying to remember all of the good times they'd had together. He looked at all the other photos too, all ten donors. Some were older -- April Jackson from Tennessee -- she had lived for 40 years and donated her kidneys and her lungs when she'd died. Some were young like Lauren -- a 22-year-old from Oklahoma, Benjamin Price -- He'd donated his lungs, heart, and liver. And then he stopped in front of a picture that brought even more tears to his already dampened eyes. Cassidy Blaire -- 5-years-old. He shook his head. He would never understand. He'd felt robbed losing his daughter at 19... he could never even begin to imagine the pain of losing a child so young.

He shook his head trying to erase those horrible thoughts and turned towards the third wall in the room. This wall was covered with photos, some black and white, some color... all beautiful. These were the recipients. There were 27 photos on this wall, he'd counted at least fifteen times already as he'd looked them over trying to guess which ones he'd be meeting today -- which ones his Lauren had given her miracle to. He couldn't even begin to guess though. There were photos of babies and children, photos of familes and photos of parents with their kids. In each of those photos someone had been given a second chance because of one of those 10 donors. It amazed him to look back and forth from the one wall to the other. It amazed him to see that from those 10 donors... 27 lives were saved.

He stood there for the longest time admiring the photos until crowds of people began entering the room around him.

He never did figure out which of those people's lives his daughter had saved, but he'd be meeting them soon enough. He'd waited three long years to find out... he was more than ready to know.

Nick Carter waited anxiously in the back of the limo next to his younger brother Aaron. He glanced over at the 23-year-old every now and again, sitting there beside him, legs bouncing nervously, sweat beads forming on his forehead. He could almost feel the tension radiating from the young man's body as they pulled up alongside the convention center, the huge UNOS banner hanging from the side announcing the big event;

"Friends and Family Gala: We Proudly Welcome our Donor and Recipient Families".

It was still hard to believe everything Aaron had been through. To look at him at that moment one would never have guessed he'd had a liver transplant three years before. He looked healthy, happy... he looked really good. His skin no longer held the yellowish tint they'd all grown used to in the months surrounding his transplant. He no longer had to worry about every small illness. Long term rejection would always be a concern, but things were certainly looking promising.

"You excited about this?" Nick asked reaching out a reassuring hand and placing it gently on Aaron's knee.

Aaron nodded. Nick didn't really need to ask the question to begin with. Aaron had talked about his 'donor' for the past three years, only refering to her as that because he didn't know her name. For three long years he'd wondered who the 19-year-old girl who saved his life had been. He'd wondered what her name was, what she looked like, what types of things she'd liked... he'd wondered how she died. It had taken him a long, long time to come to terms with the reality that he was walking around with the liver of another human being in his body. At first he'd been terribly troubled by it, even though the doctors had assured him the feelings were completely normal, it didn't make him feel better. He'd finally agreed to therapy to help him cope with the 'normal' feelings and that had helped him out immensely.

The first year of recovery had been the longest. Aaron spent more time in the doctor's office that year than he'd spent in one his entire life. He'd ended up with infections two separate times and had to be hospitalized for both infections and for one illness. He spent a total of 10 weeks in the hospital, including the 4 weeks during his transplant. He never complained though. He took it all with a grain of salt. He would go to his doctor's visits and return home sore and tired but willing to hang out with his siblings. He would spend weeks at a time in the hospital with infections or illnesses and return home the same Aaron he'd always been... ready and willing to challenge Nick to a playstation marathon.

He'd spent 6 months total living with Nick after his transplant. Though he'd never openly admit it Nick knew Aaron had enjoyed the company and Nick had enjoyed it too. The two of them had spent the spring and summer boating and fishing, laying out on the beach and playing video games together. Nick had enjoyed the time away from touring and recording and had welcomed the excuse to stay at home and just enjoy a family life.

He stared across towards his three best friends sitting on the opposite side of the seat facing him and smiled. Aj, Brian and Howie had been incredibly supportive through the entire journey. They'd easily agreed to take time off so that Nick could take care of Aaron. They'd visited often and had come up with many great activities for Aaron when he couldn't get out of the house and do anything... and they had even offered to come this day, on their day off, and perform with Nick in honor of Aaron and all of the other donors and recipients.

Brian leaned silently over and placed a hand on Aaron's still bouncing knee. He stopped bouncing it momentarily and brought his eyes up to meet the older man's.

"You alright dude?" Brian asked as he patted him on the back.

"Just nervous," Aaron responded hesitantly, "I never thought this day would actually come."

"Understandable," Brian replied.

And he hadn't. He hadn't thought the day would come. He'd never thought he would get to find out who really saved his life. He'd never thought he'd make it this far.

What would he say when he finally met her family?

How do you ever thank someone for a gift so great?

He shifted near the walls on the outskirts of the room and watched as the crowds of people continued to file slowly into the convention center. His eyes filled with tears as he listened to the beautiful song that echoed through the room. He glanced down at the program in his hand in awe of all the stars who'd agreed to participate in the event. There were singers and celebrities from various parts of the country... all willing and eager to lend their hands and volunteer for such a wonderful and life changing event. He quickly scanned through the list of musicians playing at the show that night... Tammy Cochran, who's voice already filled the center was at the top followed by Leann Womack, Brad Paisley, Rascal Flatts and a whole slew of country artists whose names he recognized. Perhaps having the reunion in Memphis, Tennessee had something to do with it. He scanned the list until he nearly reached the bottom and gasped softly to himself when he saw their names... The Backstreet Boys.

He had to wipe a tear from his eyes as the memory of that day in the hospital came quickly flooding back to him. They had been so amazingly comforting and wonderful that day. He'd remembered them singing to her in her hospital bed, the dark haired Latino never releasing her hand as he crooned the words to her favorite song. He smiled as the memory of her favorite song came back to him. He'd sung that song so many times since then, to himself, to his dog... to her gravestone. He'd never wanted to forget the words again. It was their song now and he'd remember it forever. Knowing that they would be there that evening, even if he knew they couldn't possibly remember his daughter, or himself, gave him an overwhelming feeling of comfort.

He was shaken from his thoughts by a tap on the shoulder. He turned quickly to see a young girl, about 15 or 16-years old, beautiful brown curls and the biggest green eyes he'd ever seen... she reminded him so much of Lauren he had to catch his breath. He nodded his head at her and smiled, "Hey sweetheart... what can I do for you?"

She smiled back at him, her eyes shone like the sun on a warm summer's day. "Are you Mark Grant?" She asked as she tilted herself back and forth from her toes to her heels. He nodded at her again and couldn't help but laugh when her eyes widened as big as saucers. "You have to meet my mom!" The young girl proclaimed as she took his hand in hers and started pulling him towards the opposite side of the room where he noticed for the first time a very beautiful young woman sitting at a table next to a young man and a little boy.

They stood up as he approached the table and the young man offered him a hand. He leaned out quickly and shook it in return as the woman introduced herself, "I'm Stephanie Planner and this in my husband Allen and our children Michael, and you've met Emily," the woman said as he turned to offer his hand to her next, "I think... I believe... actually," she choked a bit on her words and her husband placed a comforting hand upon her shoulder, "I know your daughter saved my life."

They all stood there in silence for a few moments as it sunk in to Mark's head that this was one of the recipients... one of Lauren's miracles. He brought back his hand in a hurry as he took a look at her from a slight distance and asked very seriously, as a tear trickled slowly down his cheek... "Which... I mean... how?"

"My heart." She answered steadily in understanding as she placed her hand over her chest as if to show him it was real. "I'd only been given another week or two to live with the heart I was born with... the heart that failed me," she said as her own tears started to flow. "I'd honestly all but given up when we received the call that changed my destiny." She watched as the older man's tears flowed quickly down his face... she didn't really know what to say other than, "Thank you."

She reached out to him and he reached back to her and the two of them stepped towards one another for the first time since they'd met and embraced. He tried his best to hold back the rush of emotion that wanted to explode from within him the moment he held the woman in his arms. He could feel her heart... actually feel it beating inside this woman's body. A part of Lauren... now a part of Stephanie.

The two of them sat down together at the table and discussed the transplant... the death, the horrible memories and the memories that had come because of it all. Stephanie still didn't know what to say to the man who'd made the most difficult decision in his life, to let his daughter go, to watch her die and give her away to save others... the very decision that allowed her to live and watch her own children grow. She watched the two of them, 15 and 10 years old... she could never even begin to imagine her life without them. It was tough enough to believe they'd almost had to live their lives without her.

Mark took Stephanie's hand and led her over to the wall of art and photography. She gasped in awe when she saw all of the beautiful paintings and the pictures the young girl had painted and taken before her life was ended far too soon. She walked over to the black and white photo of the beautiful girl in the middle of the wall and studied it carefully... "Lauren?" She asked as she backed away and wiped the tears from her eyes. He nodded.

She glanced over the wall of pictures again and smiled... "It all makes sense now."

"Hmm?" He asked as he looked at her from the corner of his eye... too entranced in the photo of his daughter to take his eyes away completely.

"I love photography now."

He smiled.

"I never really had the knack for it before... or was even really into it at all... but now... well I love it." She placed her hand over her heart once more and smiled as she took in the photo of the bald eagle. She sighed deeply. This girl really was a part of her now.

He heard the words when she said them... he knew exactly what they meant and why. His daughter was a part of this woman now, living on through her... living on as her miracle.

Aaron stood backstage at the convention center, his heart pounding, his stomach churning, his nerves completely shot. In fact, he wasn't so sure he'd ever been so nervous in his entire life. Performing all those times, going out on stage by himself and being the center of attention... that was easy compared to all of this.

How do you meet the person whose child is responsible for your very existence in the world today... knowing that the child in question is no longer alive? How can you ever be thankful enough? Grateful enough? Understanding enough? How do you say, "Thank you", "I'm sorry", and "I'll never forget the things you did for me", in the same breath? Maybe Nick had been right when he'd told him that morning to go with his gut and express the feelings as they came... but how on earth could he express all the feelings running through him at the moment?

He watched from the corner as Nick, along with his fellow band members, took the stage and belted their hearts out in their first live performance in months. They were performing one of their new songs, "You Can Let Go" first and they would follow that up with a second song -- the ending of which would be Aaron's cue to join them on stage where they would sing a song together before inviting the father of his hero to join them. He couldn't believe he was actually going to get the chance to meet this girl's family after all this time. He was excited, no doubt, but at the moment the butterflies in his stomach and the overwhelming feeling of nausea in his throat were trumping that excitement.

Aaron hadn't appeared on stage in years... three years to be exact. The last time he'd taken the stage was during the Teen Choice Awards exactly two weeks prior to entering the hospital for his worldwind adventure of chaos, and after all of that he'd had neither the time nor the energy to perform again. It had been the last thing on his mind back then though, way behind the idea of living and loving and enjoying his everyday life. I guess you can say a guy's perspectives change greatly when he almost dies. He hadn't been too thrilled when Nick suggested the idea of performing with them that evening either, but he'd finally agreed and now... now he was just nervous. Nervous, excited and a few more emotions he couldn't really explain.

The other artists walking around back stage hadn't seemed to take much notice of the young man. A few stopped to say hello or to ask how he was doing. A few looked at him like he was out of place and a few just ignored him altogether. He didn't mind though. There were a lot of country music artists there and he figured many of them didn't even know who he was... and many of them probably wouldn't recognize him if they did. He'd changed a lot in the last few years. He wasn't that skinny, scrawny kid anymore. He was broader and healthier and he looked more like a grown-up than the little boy who had busted his way into the pop scene years before. It didn't matter that no one seemed to notice him today... he was in his own world and he prefered it that way.

He glanced out across the stage into the open convention center. He could see quite a bit from his spot back in the corner. Unlike in an arena, the lights were on and them mood was less formal. He could make out faces at the tables that were spread throughout the large room. Most of them were faces of happy, smiling individuals -- people he knew whose lives had been changed the same way his life had been changed. Some were wandering around talking, some were hugging, some were sitting quietly listening to the music... and some were shedding tears. Tears of joy, thankfulness, appreciation and even those of sadness and sorrow. Some were probably shedding tears of relief. Relief of knowing... the tears he felt he'd soon be releasing. He didn't know for sure which emotions each individual felt, but he'd go to bet that all of those emotions were out there somewhere in this one big room.

There in the recesses of the quiet corner he could hide away from the spotlights and the fame and enjoy being the person he was. The person who only existed now because that 19-year-old female who died to save his life. He needed to put a name to the age and a face to the name and he knew, as he listened to the guys end their first song and begin their second, that soon... very soon... he would be able to do just that.

Mark couldn't help but sit in a stunned silence as he watched the familiar young men singing before him on the stage. He listened to the lyrics of the beautiful song he'd never heard before and thought deeply of just how much it reminded him of Lauren. If only they'd known the difference they'd made in his life... in her death. If only they'd known the calming affect their singing had had on him that day in the hospital so long ago... so very, very long ago.

Some days it seemed that if he thought hard enough and long enough he could imagine that it was only yesterday he was hugging her goodbye as she was leaving for that party. Other days and other moments the distance between seeing her and never seeing her again seemed to span a lifetime... a painful, lonely lifetime.

The best thing Mark had done for himself since his daughter's death was to get involved with UNOS. Being able to volunteer by visiting with patients who were awaiting donor organs and seeing the otherside of the experience he went through... getting to tour the country to share his story alongside other parents just like him... these experiences had given him a newfound hope for life. It had become a great release from what had become a day-to-day sitting at home and missing his daughter. Volunteering for UNOS gave him a reason to live. He knew that he was helping others. Helping them to understand the importance of organ donation and the lifechanging experience that comes along with it. He also knew in his heart that Lauren would have been so proud of him. That thought alone gave him the courage to struggle on.

So far that day he'd met two of Lauren's donor recipients. The recipients of her heart and of her kidney. He'd known before the convention that the woman who received Lauren's lungs had not made it. As disappointed as he'd been to hear the news, the letter he recieved from her family thanking him for the amazing gift of two more beautiful years with their mother... gave him great comfort.

The young girl who received Lauren's kidney had bopped up to him shortly after he'd met Stephanie. She was a young, spunky 18-year old... Amanda was her name. She reminded him so much of Lauren with her long dark hair and her big bright eyes. She was full of life and love and happiness and it showed. She'd hugged him tight and thanked him, "so, so much", for what his daughter had given to her. For what he'd given to her. They talked for a long time about how she'd just graduated from high school and how she'd recently gotten accepted to Yale. She'd made him smile more than he thought possible and she'd even made laugh. A young, bright-eyed girl with an infectious laugh. Lauren was living on.

It made him proud to know his daughter had saved these two beautiful women. A mother of two and a young enspiring lawyer. UNOS was right, meeting the recipients made everything real... real and so much easier to comprehend and to accept. His daughter was now a tangible part of another life.

He listened to the last lyrics as tears filled his eyes. He'd dreamed every night of the day he would be with Lauren and his wife again in Heaven. At times he'd actually wished for the day to come sooner. He knew that he needed to stay on this earth and to spread the message... he figured this was his calling. He'd always believed that God had a reason for everything. If he could convince even one person to become a donor... then he was making a difference in the world and a that difference was enough for him to carry on.

He watched as the song ended and the young men stood quietly on stage.

"We have a special guest with us tonight," the young blonde, who he assumed was his daughter's favorite, spoke loudly into his microphone as he motioned for someone backstage to join them. Cheers erupted from the audience as another, younger blonde that looked just like him stepped out from the side and took his spot there beside him.

"This is my younger brother Aaron Carter. Many of you may remember him from his days as a popstar. Many of you may remember him as the cute blonde brother of me..." the crowd laughed at the words as the young Carter reached over and smacked his brother on the back, "but there's only one reason he is here with us tonight and that... that is because of someone amazingly special."

The crowd sighed as Nick wiped tears from his eyes and tried to steel his emotions. He paused for a few moments, collecting his thoughts, gathering his gumption and continued, "One of those amazing people on that wall right there, one of those 10 donors... one of your family members," and he pointed to the black and white portraits across the room, wiping his eyes on his sleeve and sighing heavily... "saved my brother's life."

Mark stared in amazement as Aaron stood there on the stage, surrounded by the group of overtowering Backstreet Boys, looking young and innocent and totally lost, tears clearly filling his eyes and spilling out onto his cheeks and he couldn't help but shed a few tears himself. Nick handed his brother the microphone and watched silently as the young man could barely choke out his words... "I need to thank you for saving my life... I've waited so long for this. Is Mark Grant here tonight?"

Mark's heart nearly stopped in shock as he stood slowly, feeling completely out of his own body, and began to cross the room. The cheers from grew louder around him as the men on the stage motioned for him to continue forward.

Surely not. This had to be some joke. But then, Aaron was looking right at him, tears streaming down his face, a smile plastered on his thin lips. Nick took the microphone again and whispered quietly into it, "Mr. Grant... come on up here so we can finally give you the hug we've waited all these years to give you?"

His steps were slow as he plodded towards the stage. His own tears spilling down his face now. He couldn't believe this... he didn't believe this.

Aaron watched in awe as the older man walked slowly towards the stage. The tears in the older man's eyes brought tears to his own eyes as he turned silently to notice that Nick, Aj, Howie and Brian were crying as well. He'd waited for this moment for all these years and now, here it was. What would he say to the man now walking up onto the stage? How could he possibly express the emotions he felt... his sorrow for the man's loss... and his overwhelming gratitude for the gift the he and his daughter had given him.

When Mark had finally made his way up onto the stage and was standing there in before him, he couldn't move. The two of them stared at each other in silence, taking in the moment for all it was and all it could have been. Finally, when the entire room had grown eerily quiet and the moment had grown slightly uncomfortable, Aaron handed his microphone to Nick and reached out his arms towards the man who returned the gesture with a warm embrace.

"Thank you..." Aaron sniffled into his ear, trying hard to fight back the tears that were steadily streaming down his cherry red cheeks. Tears he knew damned well he could only cry because this man's daughter had died to save his life. All this time and all the thoughts he'd put into what he was going to say and that was it, "I don't know what to say other than thank you."

But thank you was enough for Mr. Grant as he held the young blonde in his arms and hugged him tightly, thinking of how often he'd dreamed of this very moment -- of meeting the people his daughter had saved in her death -- and taking in the fact that such a painful and horrific tragedy in one person's life could bring about such joy and cause for celebration in another's.

"Thank you is enough," he whispered as he pulled away from the young man's embrace and turned to give his anxiously awaiting older brother a hug.

"My daughter..." he spoke quietly when the hug had ended and they were once again standing on the stage in silence, "my beautiful Lauren... she was a huge fan," he watched as Nick's face lit up in a grin and he reached towards him again for another small hug.

"I wonder," Nick whispered into his ear as the two of them hugged, "how Lauren would feel if she knew that now I'm her biggest fan." He sighed as he reached carefully up and wiped a tear from where it had come to rest upon his chin.

At those words Mark's heart skipped a beat. How would she feel? How truly incredibly happy would it make his daughter to know what had become of her life? Her liver, her kidneys, her lung... her heart. How grateful would she have been for the chance to give life to so many families... to so many wonderful people? How blessed would she have felt to be able to make up for the loss of her mother by giving her own life to someone else?

He could only imagine the smile on her face as she watched this entire party from Heaven. Watched side-by-side with her mother, who he just knew for certain was so incredibly proud of the woman their daughter had grown up to be.

He was shaken from his thoughts by the feeling of a hand upon his shoulder and he turned quickly to see the familiar face of the young Latino he remembered singing so beautifully to his daughter the day she had died. There was no sign of recognition in his eyes... know sign of rememberance... but he wondered if the man knew. He smiled slightly at Howie, who returned with his own grin and a small hug.

"We sang to your daughter..." he jerked sharply when he heard another voice speak. It was the young man in the sunglasses with the hat upon his head and the scruffy beard -- Aj maybe. He was pretty sure his name was Aj. "We sang to her in the hospital," he continued as he approached him slowly, the look of recognition definite in his eyes, "the same day Aaron received his lung transplant."

Mark's stomach lept up into his throat as he watched the other three young men stand there in silence, their mouths open wide.

"You did," he responded, wiping his own tears as recognition finally dawned on the faces of the other two members who'd been there that day, "I will never forget the amazing gift you shared with my daughter and myself that day."

"Wow," Brian spoke as he approached the quiet coversation now occuring on stage, "I remember that now... I should have known. Aj never forgets a face."

Aaron and Nick stood in silence as the three men took their turns at hugging Mr. Grant and offering their thanks and their condolences. He couldn't believe what he was hearing... that the very day this young girl had died... the very day he'd been given his gift of life... Brian, Aj, and Howie had met her and shared their gift of song with her family. All these years of waiting and wondering to find out that they'd spent a few quiet moments on that day with the young woman who'd saved his life.

The hugs, and thanks and shows of true gratitude and humility continued there on that stage for a several more minutes. The crowd watched in awe as the site unfolded before them.

"Maybe you guys should do another song," Mark offered when he felt the audience may be growing bored. He hugged Aaron one last time and turned to walk down the stage.

"Any requests?" Aj hollered after him as he held his hand over the microphone and wiped his tears one last time, thinking that perhaps the older man would like to hear that one song that reminded him of his daughter.

"There is a song," Mr. Grant spoke quietly, "you sang it in the hospital and it reminded me of my daughter... I've listened to it since then, many times and it reminds me of her everytime I hear the words..."

"What's that?" Nick asked, "just say the word and we'll sing it in her honor..."

Mark returned silently to his seat at the back of the crowded convention room, trying very hard not to watch as all eyes in the room followed his every movement. He hated being the center of attention and this certainly had not been at all what he'd expected when he'd set out for the convention that morning. He watched as the four men, along with the young Aaron Carter took the stage for the final song of the evening. Silence fell throughout the room as the music began to play and Aaron began to sing...

To hear that song again, this time being sung in his daughter's honor, and by the very young man she'd given a huge part of her life to... it was amazingly touching and amazingly painful all at the same time. He'd dreamed of her wedding day and of walking her down the aisle when she was just a little girl... he thought maybe this felt a little bit like that might feel. He'd never been more proud in his entire life. His eyes filled with tears as Aaron's voice filled the room. He couldn't believe how incredible the young man looked for a kid who just a few short years ago had been dying of liver failure. He looked happy and healthy and far different from many of the transplant patients he'd come to know through his volunteer visits on the transplant ward. He took comfort in the knowledge that his Lauren had made it all possible.

Aaron closed his eyes up on the stage and sang with all of his heart, putting his entire soul into the song he was singing for the father of his hero. He couldn't believe he'd finally met the man whose decision to give so unselfishly was the only reason he was still alive. It was no small miracle. He'd been given days... only days to live and he knew that it had been a 'now or never' chance. A now or never, one in a million, this may not happen chance. Lauren Grant was his one in a million.

He finished singing the song, tears spilling down his cheeks, his heart pounding, his entire body wracked with emotions.

He looked out across the room and locked eyes with Mr. Grant once more. No words needed to be said in that moment... it was all there in the eyes of the two men who'd been through so much. The eyes that showed the tears and the saddness, the joy, the laughter, the memories...

and most of all, the miracles.

Mark smiled as he glanced across the room at her picture on the wall... her bright green eyes shining like the sun, her smile as wide as the Mississippi River. He turned one last time to look at the young man on the stage and the peace that he'd come to know so often in the past three years found him once more.

His daughter was no longer just 'someone's' miracle...

Her miracles now had names and faces. They were people with hopes and dreams and just as much a reason to be alive and in this world as anyone else and they were only here now because of Lauren.

Stephanie, Amanda and Aaron...

Of all the dreams he'd had for his daughter as he'd watched her grow and become a young woman... of all of the plans he'd had for her life and the hopes he'd had for her future... this had never been anything he'd imagined.

He'd never imagined in all his life... in all her life... the beautiful miracle she'd one day become.