Chapter 29 Ashes Of Your Past

            It took two weeks for me to truly fall for Nick. My feelings for him grew stronger and stronger every single day. I tried to say “I love you” to him but I couldn’t bring myself to say those words just yet. It still felt awkward. I guess he felt awkward too because he didn’t say it to me. Yet Nick kept his promise and took everything slow which was a much needed and appreciated break from the fast paced relationships I was used to.

            He came over one night and we barbequed on my fire pit in the back yard. While we were roasting marshmallows for dessert I brought out a box and set it down next to the fire.

            “What’s that?” he asked stuffing a marshmallow into his mouth.  

            “Pictures I want to burn.”

            I sat down next to him and started looking at the pictures.  

            “Why are you looking at them when you want to burn them?”

            “I just want to see them one more time and make sure I want to get rid of them.”

            He grabbed a handful from the box and flipped through them then handed them to me. I picked out a few here and there that ended up in the box by accident. The others I tossed into the flames. They were pictures of all my exes mostly Dylan, Jasper, and Ryan. I found it somewhat funny that I had taken the most pictures of the boys who hurt me the most.

            As I looked through the pictures all the good memories started to flood back to me but the bad memories would consume the good quickly. That’s when I would toss the picture into the small fire. That process made me very upset but Nick hadn’t noticed it until I got to the pictures of Ryan.

            When the last picture was eaten by the flames I was no longer able to control my emotions. Nick wrapped his arms around my shoulder and pushed me into his chest. He whispered into my ear, “They’re all gone now. Nothing but ashes of your past. I’m here now.” He kissed my forehead and I wiped away my tears. He held me like that until the flames started to die down. Nick was comforting me by just being there. I finally felt like everything was going to be ok… now that Nick and I were together.

            Nick had wanted to take me out somewhere special for a long time but he didn’t know where to take me. Before he left the night we burned the pictures we set up a date and Nick advised that I get fancied up. So the next day around 11 am I was getting ready for our 11:30 date. I was cutting it close but I was having a good hair day and decided to do my hair and makeup 1st then slip on my favorite purple dress just before Nick came so he could help me zip it up.

I had just finished with my makeup when I heard the front door open.

“Hello?” I called over the banister.  No reply came so I walked down the stairs.

“What the fuck are you doing here Ryan?!”

“Well hello to you too Kalie.”

“Get the fuck out!”

“I came to get you back baby. I miss you like crazy. I can’t live without you.”

“Well I can live without you! Get out now! Ryan get out of here! I don’t want you back! You’re not for me! Just leave! I never want to see you again! I never want to be with you ever again! You broke my heart! I thought you were different but I was wrong! Just leave!”      

He walked over to me and grabbed my arm bringing me inches from him. He got in my face and I could smell the over powering scent of alcohol on his breath. He stared hard into my eyes and said with grinding teeth, “If I can’t have you no one will!”

I felt something hard start to poke through my stomach. I looked down and my eyes widened with horror! Ryan was holding a gun to my stomach and was slowly pushing it deeper into my skin. I stared to push him away and plead, “Ryan! Please stop! Don’t do this to me! Please don’t do this!”

“This is the only way I can have you Kalie!”

“Ryan don’t!” I tried to push him away from me as I stumbled backward but he gripped my arm tightly and continued to inch the gun closer and closer to me. My heart was pounding in my chest and beads of sweat were trickling down my forehead as tears blurred my vision.

***Nick’s Point Of View***

I had pulled into the drive way and saw Ryan’s car. I stepped closer to the house and found the front door wide open. The only thought that ran through my mind was, “Kalie! That little fucker better not be laying a hand on my girlfriend!”

I ran into the house with pure adrenaline coursing through my veins.

***Kalie’s Point Of View***

Ryan’s finger was ready on the trigger when someone tackled him to the ground. Just as Ryan hit the floor I heard the gun fire and felt an immense pain on my right side. Then my world went blurry.

***Nick’s Point Of View***

“YOU MOTHER FUCKER!” I wrestled with Ryan and exerted all my strength into the fight. I was trying my hardest to pry the gun from his hands but the bastard wouldn’t let go. I finally got the gun pointed away from me and now it was pointing toward Ryan’s forehead.

He smiled a devilish smile at me and hissed, “Why are you wasting all your energy on me when yourprecious Kalie needs her knight in shining armor?”

“CAUSE I WANT TO FUCKING KILL YOU!”

He hackled then replied, “You don’t have to worry about doing that.”

I heard something in the gun click then Ryan looked over at Kalie and said, “Kalie baby wait for me on the other side! I’m coming! We could finally live together forever!”

The next thing I know he pulled the trigger and blew his own brains out. I jumped off his lifeless body with my hands shaking and my heart pounding with fear. Then I glanced at Kalie who was lying lifeless on the floor.

***Kalie’s Point of View***

            I lay on the cold hard wood floor for God knows how long. My vision started to blur but I remember seeing a figure with golden blonde hair kneel over me.

The pain coming from my side was becoming unbearable and my eyelids were feeling like heavy pieces of metal. I wanted to close my eyes thinking that when I opened them again all my pain would vanish and this whole horrible ordeal would have never existed.

I closed my eyes but the blurred figure screamed, “Kalie! No! Stay with me! Don’t go anywhere Kayl stay with me!”

I slowly opened my eyes and focused on the blonde haired figure. When my vision cleared I saw it was my boyfriend.

I whispered meekly, “Nick?”

“Yes Kalie it’s me. You have to stay with me babe ok?”

“But it hurts so bad!”

He ripped off his shirt and tied it around my waste.

“Ouch!”

“I’m sorry Kay but you’re losing so much blood. You have to promise me you’ll stay with me. You can’t go anywhere. And you have to keep your eyes open at least until the ambulance and police come.”

“I’ll try Nick. They feel so heavy.”

My lids started to close and Nick brought me into his arms, “Kalie! You can’t do this! You’re my best friend! I can’t live without you! Kalie don’t do this to me! Don’t do this to us! I need you Kalie!  I love you!”

“I love you too Nick. And I’ll always be here,” I placed my hand weakly on his left peck, “in your heart.” He grabbed my hand and kissed it.

“Don’t go!” he pleaded.

“And you’ll always be here,” I pointed to my own chest, “in my heart.”

I looked up at him one more time and smiled slightly with the last bit of strength I had left. Then my eyes closed.

“NO! KALIE!” I heard him scream then felt him kiss all over my face. “Don’t leave me! I can’t live without you Kalie I love you! I love you so much!” He then kissed my lips. I wanted to kiss him back; I wanted to scream to him, “I love you more than you know!” but I couldn’t even move the tiniest muscle in my limp body. I wanted to let him know that I really did love him more than my just best friend.

I started to lose consciousness and the last thing I thought was, “If I am going to die, at least I’m in Nick’s arms.”

***Nick’s Point of View***

            I cried over her body until the EMTS came and placed her into the ambulance.

“Are you family?” one EMT asked me.

“No but I am her boyfriend.”

“Is there any family living nearby that could go with her?”

“They’re all at work but I’m here! I love her! I have to go with her! Let me go with my best friend!”

“Ok sir. Get in and try to remain calm.”

Once we got to the hospital I called Mrs. Smith who worked there so she was in the emergency room in a matter of minutes. Once she saw the blood on my hands she broke down.

“I t…tried stopping the blood,” I explained.

“Thank God you were there Nickolas! Who knows what would have happened if you weren’t! She has a better chance of surviving because of you!” she paused when Mr. Smith, Kalie’s siblings, and our best friends, including Mark and Lacey, rushed over to us.

“What’s going on with my baby?” Mr. Smith asked. He looked down at the blood on my hands and screamed in my face, “What happened to Kalie?! If you did this I swear I’ll…”

“Daddy calm down it was Ryan who did this not Nick!” Kim got between the two of us.

“Dad, Nick was the one who called the ambulance! She could have been lying in her own pool of blood if it wasn’t for Nick!” Kyle stood up for me.

“I’m sorry Nick. I’m just in shock that this is happening to my baby girl!” a tear ran down his cheek.

“It’s alright Mr. Smith, I’m in shock too.”

“We’re all in shock,” Crystal sobbed.

“Any news on her?” Michelle asked wiping a tear from her face.

“Not yet,” Mrs. Smith sniffled.

“We just got here a few minutes ago,” I said.

A half an hour passed by and a few cops came over to us to ask us questions. I had to tell them every excruciating detail that I witnessed. One cop noticed the bruises and cuts I had on my arms from fighting with Ryan. That little fucker was clawing the shit out of my arms and even bit me three times. The cop called over a nurse and she pulled me into an examining room to clean me up and give me a shirt.

I didn’t want to go with the nurse because I wanted to be there to hear any update about Kalie.

“I don’t care about me! I care about Kalie! Once I hear about her then I’ll take care of myself!”

“Nickolas Gene Carter! You will go get yourself cleaned up right this instant! You have done all you can do for Kalie at the very moment and we don’t need both of you to be in the hospital at the same time. Go with the nurse!” I stood still and stared at Mrs. Smith who just yelled at me.

I looked around and Kasey commented, “If Kalie was here right now she would scream at you to go with the nurse.”

Kim looked up at me, “Go with the nurse. For Kalie.”

“Fine. For Kalie.” I followed the nurse into the room and once I slipped the clean shirt over my head and was all bandaged up I ran back out to the waiting room because a doctor was talking to Kalie’s parents.

I got there just in time to hear the doctor say, “She has lost a lot of blood and we are bandaging the wound now. We are also giving her blood but right now it will be a miracle if she does pull through this.”

“NO! MY BABY COULD DIE! KEN THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!” Mr. Smith brought his wife into his arms and cried with her.

I fell to my knees and broke down. Mark, Lacey, Michelle, Crystal, Dan and Chris huddled around me in a group hug as Kim, Kyle, and Kasey huddled around their parents.

We all sobbed for a long while until Kyle pulled himself away from the rest of his siblings and parents. He sat next to Melissa who grabbed his hand and he raised his head to the ceiling and pleaded, “Grandma, Grandpa, please keep Kalie safe. Please tell her to come back to us. Grandma, Grandpa, please tell her we all love her and want her to come back. We all can’t live without her!”

After what seemed like days the doctor came out and told us that Kalie was now in a coma and suggested that we all say our good byes now because no one knew how long she had left.

“Let’s go in a few of us at a time. This way we can each have our own time with her,” Crystal suggested.

“Then we can all stay with her tonight,” Dan suggested.

“That’s a good idea. Come on honey,” Mrs. Smith said solemnly, “let’s go see our baby girl.”

They walked arm in arm to her room and came back the same way after their sad visit with their daughter. Kim, Kyle, Kasey and their spouses went next.

When they came back, Michelle took my hand, “The six of us are going together. Do you want to go with us?”

“I want to go by myself if you don’t mind.”

“Hang in there Kaos,” Chris patted my shoulder.

“Knowing Kayl, she’ll pull through this,” Mark commented.