Chapter 8 Could he be taken from me that easily?  

***** Kalie’s Point Of View *****

1999 rolled around and on May 18, BSB released Millennium and it sold nearly 500,000 copies the first day. I remember how excited Crystal, Michelle and I were that day. We were anticipating that CD ever since the day Nick asked us to be part of a choir for one of the songs titled Perfect Fan. That was the only song we knew of off Millennium at the time and we wanted to hear the rest of the album badly. It was a good thing our local music store allowed us to preorder the CD because by the time the three of us got there one lonely Millennium CD was left on the self.

We raced back to my place to listen to the CD. My girls and I must have listened to that CD about five times in a row the day we got it. We were listening closely to the songs so we could figure out the lyrics and memorize them. I remember all the emotions we felt with each song; Larger Than Life made us feel appreciated when we figured out the lyrics were written for us fans, we smiled at I Want It That Way, It’s Gotta Be You and The One, Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely and Perfect Fan made us tear. We had never heard Perfect Fan in entirety but now that we did we all agreed that it was a beautiful song.

Just as we listened to the CD for the final time I heard James, Kim’s fiancé, yell down the stairs, “Kalie, you have mail!”

“Thanks James, I’ll be right there.” I ran up the stairs, grabbed my mail from the table and skipped back down to my waiting friends.

“Whatcha get?” Crystal asked.

“A package from… New York?”

“New York? Who do you know in New York?” Michelle questioned as she looked at the label on the brown UPS box.

“I don’t know unless it’s those dance videos I ordered but I thought they were coming from Orlando.”

I opened the box and found a letter sitting on top of some packaging.

I looked at the familiar handwriting and smiled.

“Whose it from?” Michelle asked.

“Nick. It can tell by the handwriting.”

“What’s it say?” Crystal asked.

“Hey Kalie!,” I read from his letter, “Hopefully If I mailed this in time it got to you by May 18 because I really wanted you to have it by then. But also I wanted to give you this in person but work is preventing me to do that so I’ll just write out the way I wanted you to open this box. First carefully remove the Styrofoam.”

I did and laughed when I saw another copy of Millennium. My girls looked at the CD and chuckled too. Michelle laughed, “It looks like Nick is a little too late.”

“If I had known he was going to send me this I wouldn’t have bought my own copy.”

“What’s at the bottom of the box?” Crystal asked.

I continued reading, “I hope you didn’t buy the CD but if you did here’s another copy but open it.”

I slowly opened the case expecting something to fall out of it but instead all that was inside the case was a CD signed by the Boys.

“You got a signed CD?!” my girls exclaimed.

“Damn! You’re so lucky Kalie!” Crystal looked at me shocked.

“I want a signed CD,” Michelle pouted. “But I also want to know what’s at the bottom of the box.”

I finished the rest of the letter, “Finally I know how much you love to learn new songs so look in the bottom of the box,” I did and there was the sheet music for all the songs on the album. “Yes I got you a copy of the sheet music for all the songs on Millennium. Now you can learn the songs in half the time it would take you without the sheet music. Enjoy Millennium and have fun learning our new songs. I can’t wait to see you, whenever that will be. I miss you a lot Kayl. Love Nick. P.S. Don’t tell Michelle and Crystal about this package. They are each getting one too.”

They screamed out of pure joy and shock. They looked at each other then back at me. And as if they rehearsed it, said to me at the same time, “We’re going home now. We got to get our packages!”

I giggled and replied, “Ok girlies. I love you and I’ll talk to you later. Have fun with the sheet music.”

“Thanks Kayl. Talk to you later! Love ya too!” they said, again in unison.

After my girls left I called up Nick to thank him for the special CD and sheet music.

He answered his cell with an exuberant, “Kalie!”

“Hey Nick! How you doin’ bud? What’s goin’ on?”

“I’m doing good Kayl. I’m just missing you and the rest of our gang that’s all.”

“We’re missing you too Kaos. Where are you now?”

“We’re back in our hotel in New York. We just got back from Time Square where we were signing CD’s and meeting fans today. The fans practically shut down Time Square! It was crazy! But it was awesome to see how many fans were out there today to buy Millennium. I wish you were there though.”

“I wish I was there too,” I pictured the scene in Time Square earlier that day. It must have been crowded, chaotic, overwhelming, but at the same time kind of sweet for the Boys to see that many fans up close and personal.

“I’ll tell you what Kalie,” Nick broke my day dream, “We are going to start touring this summer and when we have a New York show I’ll send you and the rest of our gang tickets. I think we’ll be in North America by June or July. And I can get you guys a hotel room or you could stay on the bus with me.”

“I would love to do that Nick but I’m going to be busy this summer. I have a lot to do in June and July especially with Kim getting married. But you know what I promise you that I will come to at least one of your Florida shows.”

“Ok. That will work. But let me at least get you back stage passes like the last time.”

“You have a deal Nick. Do you have any free time before that though to come home?”

“Unfortunately not,” I pouted at the disappointment in his voice. “We’re getting really busy. And I’m mad that I won’t be able to come home for a little bit. I miss everyone, especially you Kalie.”

I sighed, “I really miss you Nick. It’s tough not having my best bud home.”

“It’s tough for me not having my best bud on tour with me.”

“Well now that I know you’re having such a tough time without me I may just take up that offer of becoming a BSB dancer and coming on tour with you,” I joked.

He laughed, “That would be awesome! But,” his voice dropped, “I know you wouldn’t be able to do that because of your job and being the captain of your dance team and with school. I understand you’re very occupied.”

“Why do you sound so sad?”

“I’m afraid I’m never going to see you again.”

“Oh Nick don’t say that. We’ll have plenty of time to see each other… some day,” I tried to sound positive but realizing that day might not be as soon as we both wanted it to be was difficult.

“Some day. I hate not knowing when the next time is going to be when I’ll be able to see you again.”

“I hate it too Kaos. But you know what? You are doing what you love now and don’t you enjoy being a Backstreet Boy?”

“I do. It is pretty cool to be a Backstreet Boy. But I never thought we would never see each other again.”

“Nick we’ll see each other again I promise…” I was interrupted when Kim called me for dinner, “Listen Nick dinner is ready and you know Kim and being on time for dinner. But I called to say thank you so much for the signed CD and the sheet music. You didn’t have to get me that.”

“Oh yes I did Kayl. I knew you and the girls would love the sheet music and the rest of the Boys wanted to send you the CD. Do you like it?”

“I love it! The girls and I listened to it five times in a row today!”

“Kalie Marie! Dinner!” Kim called with a touch of impatience in her voice.

“Kim is getting pissy so I have to go. Thanks again for the CD and sheet music.”

“You’re welcome Kalie. I’ll call you when I get the chance and if not call me again. It was really nice hearing your voice again. I miss you.”

“I miss you too buddy. Bye Nick. I love you.”

“I love you too Kalie. Bye.”

I hung up the phone and headed upstairs. As I did I thought about the way he said, “I love you too Kalie”. He and I have said that to each other before, heck I have said it to all of my best friends, but only for the fact that they are my best friends and are like brothers and sisters to be, but there was something about the way he said it to me that night. I couldn’t put my finger on it but there was something very different about it.

I was also thinking about his voice. God, I never would have thought that I missed his voice as much as I did. Grant it I would hear him singing everyday either on the radio or on CD but it felt really good to hear him talk. The way he said my name when he answered my call sent a warming sensation throughout my entire body.

Then I imagined the look on his face when he answered my call. He must have been smiling; I could hear it in his voice. I pictured that smile of his and realized I was missing that a lot too.

Who am I kidding? I was missing Nick period.   

After dinner I locked myself in my room and took out the sheet music Nick sent me. I “studied” the music and kept playing the songs I was having trouble with over and over until I got the entire CD correct. I felt very accomplished because I taught myself 12 songs in one night.

That night I dreamed of the last night Nick and I shared together before he went to work on the Millennium CD. The scene of just the two of us sitting under the stars replayed vividly as I slept. His voice was so clear in my dream that I thought it was real until I woke up. And trust me; it wasn’t the calmest way to wake up.

In my dream Nick had just offered his shoulder to me and I slowly lowered my head onto it. The smell of his cologne was soothing and his breathing was starting to lull me to sleep when I heard someone scream, “Oh my god! It’s Nick Carter from the Backstreet Boys! Get him!

We both raised our heads to see who it was and when we did, a mob of girls wearing Backstreet Boys apparel stampeded toward Nick and I. They grabbed Nick and dragged him away from me. He tried to fight his way free but the overly excited fans were unbelievably too strong for him. I ran after the mob and Nick reached out for me and screamed, “Kalie! Help me! Kalie!”

I tried to grab his hand as I ran after that mob of crazy girls but it was no use. Just as I was about to touch his hand, he was sucked into the middle of the mob and vanished from my sight.

I jumped awake and looked around my room. I was disappointed that I did wake up in my own room and not back on the boat with Nick but I was relieved that it was only a dream. Then I sat in bed and thought about it. Could Nick really be stolen from me just because he’s a Backstreet Boy? Could he be taken from me that easily?