- Text Size +
I stared at the drawings sprawled out on the desk in my office and let them consume my thoughts. I delved into the fictional world that I had designed. I loved being able to take a concept and envision the bigger picture on paper. It was exciting to see it come to life once finished with color. I felt proud of the finished product that Marc was going to view today. After we received the job he was quick to point out some areas of concern, it took me all week to make the changes for Friday's meeting. I knew he would be pleased with them, yet the pit in my gut grew. I placed a hand on my stomach and closed my eyes as I took a deep breath and let it out. I'll be damned if I was going to be anxious about this.

I turned my attention to the door as I heard a short knock. Jenni was standing in the doorway carrying two Starbucks cups, “I thought you could use a coffee break.”

“Those smell heavenly. Thank you.” I walked over in my black wide legged pants and accepted the tall coffee from Jenni’s hand. I let the aroma fill my senses as I took a drink.

“Anything to help. I know how tense the week has been for you.”

“Has it? I hadn’t noticed.” I played it cool. I didn’t like being anything but professional at work.

“No need to be coy with me Renee. Anyone could sense that; I just assume it’s because of Nick being gone for the week.” The thought of him when she spoke his name arose the fear in my body that I kept pushing away. I tried telling myself that I was upset with him, but I knew in my heart it was my fear of losing him, of something threatening our relationship that scared me.

“It’s always a bit more tiring while he’s gone but it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

“I don’t know how you work and manage to take care of two boys while he’s off partying.”

"Excuse me?" I asked confused by the change of direction in the conversation. I crossed my arms with coffee still in hand.

“Didn’t you see the TMZ coverage last night? They caught Nick and A.J. outside a strip club.” I tried to comprehend why my intern was looking into my life, yet was somehow amused at the idea of her searching celebrity gossip on her time off.

"Last night was A.J.'s performance. I'm sure he was out." I declared quickly, trying to end the conversation before it began.

"Yes, he was. He looked rather intoxicated and they were arguing." Jenni stood before me casually relaying the events. I couldn't for the life of me understand why this was important for me to hear. Why would she tell me this before a meeting? The anger started to rise.

“Why are you telling me this?”

“I’m sorry, I knew it was a gamble to mention it, but he just looked far gone, it was not good. I just thought you should know.”

"Jenni, there will always be media surrounding my husband, it's never how it looks on TV or the internet. Those companies skew everything. I think we should get back to work now. Thanks again for the coffee."

"Yes, Renee." Jenni bowed her head as she walked out. I was stunned. What just happened? Did I just get filled in on my husband's doings from my 21-year-old intern? Was the coffee just a scapegoat to come and talk about Nick? I didn't know whether to be upset or concerned at the idea of Nick being caught drunk. I didn't like the idea of what happened the last time he had been drinking. And the arguing? It didn't sound good, but I wasn't going to look into it. I learned early on in our relationship that watching or reading any paparazzi news only brought trouble. I chuckled at the thought of them outside of a strip club, no doubt initiated by A.J. If it were true, I knew it was harmless.

Shaking the events that just happened out of my head, I turned to look at the drawings once more before Marc's arrival and felt something warm hit my chest. "Shit!" I cursed as I dropped the cup to grab my shirt. I pulled it away from my skin to stop the burning. This was the worst thing to happen. I couldn't meet him with a stain on my shirt. I looked around the office for something to wipe it up with and saw nothing. No towels, tissues, anything? Damn it Renee. I cursed myself for being unprepared. I needed to change my shirt and do it quickly. I had a spare shirt in my bag for a meeting at the school that was more casual. I untucked the sleeveless black silk shirt from my pants and walked to my bag for the new shirt. I pulled off the black one and reached for the pale pink blouse when I heard a familiar low-pitched voice.

"Hope I'm not too late, I got held up in traffic." Marc had entered the office. I squeezed my eyes shut and cursed myself again for not closing the door before I started stripping. I quickly took the shirt and covered my bra. I looked at him and was paralyzed. How embarrassing!

“Marc, I…” I stumbled to speak as he cut me off.

“Oh! I’m sorry! I should have knocked first. I shouldn’t have just walked right in here.”

“No, I had the door open. It’s my fault.” I apologized quickly as I felt my cheeks flush.

“Well, I, I’ll let you finish up.” He stuttered as he turned around for me to finish dressing. I dropped the shirt and threw on the new one like my life depended on it. I jammed the other into the bag, no longer concerned about the stain on it. I then noticed the cup on the floor and went to pick it up.

Marc heard my movement and peeked over his shoulder as I reached for the cup. “Did you have an accident?”

I stood up and caught his dark brown eyes looking directly at me, I swallowed, “Yeah clumsy me spilled the coffee. I forgot to close the door.”

“Well if you need a minute I understand. We don’t have to do this right now.”

“Oh no, I’m ready. I’m just embarrassed.”

“Well, I will be professional.”

“Good because I may need some help.” I shied away from him.

He reached out and touched my arm, “I doubt you will.” I felt the nervousness fade away with his touch. Just as soon as he reached for me, he let go and shifted focus to the drawings. “Are these them? They already look great from here.” He walked over to the desk and picked one up.

I watched as he held the lobby drawing in his hand and studied my work. He was wearing dark blue jeans with a sweater and a black jacket. It was the most casual I’ve seen him, even his brown hair was messy.

“I hoped you’d like them. I think the changes make a big difference.” I stood next to him and caught a whiff of his cologne. I breathed it in, it smelled good. It had been a week since I had smelled Nick’s and I missed it. I didn’t realize how much until now. I let my mind wonder to Nick that I didn’t hear Marc speaking to me.

“They’re great, I knew you could pull it off.” Marc turned to me, “Renee? Renee are you alright?” He touched my arm again and I flinched.

“Are you sure we don’t need to reschedule?” He asked concerned.

“I’m sorry, I seem to be distracted today.” I rubbed my forehead and walked away from him. He sat the drawings back down on the desk and waited for me to speak.

"I just got some news about Nick, it's why I spilled my coffee. It's why I just froze right there."

“Ah, is he ok?”

“Oh yeah, I’m sure he’s great.”

He raised his eyebrows, “’Are you?” I didn’t know how to answer that. I actually couldn’t understand why I was having this conversation, why I let myself get distracted at work. This was unlike me.

“I don’t know.” The words slipped out before I could take them back.

"Here, sit." Marc motioned to the gray sofa by the door. He moved his briefcase to clear a spot for me. I followed.

“Just take a minute.” His responses were short and to the point. It was easy to relax with how calmly he was approaching all of this.

“Thank you for handling this so professionally.”

“I take that’s important to you,” he chuckled, “Don’t worry about today. We all have personal lives. I’m sorry you and Nick are struggling.”

“I wouldn’t say that. He’s in LA this week, I just miss him.”

“I thought you said you just learned some news about Nick?”

“Oh, I did. I just found out he was caught drunk on camera last night. It’s nothing new, I just wish he were here instead.” I got up from the sofa. This conversation was too personal for my comfort. “Do you have any questions or concerns about the drawings?”

“No, I don’t have a negative remark about them. I can picture the space beautifully. Let’s do it.”

“Really? That’s great!” I was surprised and delighted I didn’t have to redo any work again. Now we could get started on the exciting parts of the project. “I will finalize the material selections and give the specifications to the project manager and we’ll start the purchasing process.”

"I'm looking forward to it." He stood up and reached for his briefcase. He walked towards the door, stopped and turn to me, "Don't be embarrassed about today. I've never worked with someone as talented and honest as you," he lingered his gaze on me for a few moments before exiting, "Oh, and don't worry much about Nick. He'll come back to you." I was left speechless.