Chapter 6: Just Another Girlie Girl
The next morning was Saturday. The shop was always closed on Saturdays but I’d been getting up early every morning for so long now that I couldn’t sleep in no matter how much I wanted to. By eight o’clock I was up, showered and pacing my trailer wishing I had something to do to keep my mind off of him. Them actually. Nick, AJ and Howie. Even Brian had me stumped. I didn’t know what my problem was and I didn’t know what I wanted. All I did know was I needed some fucking air.
I went to the only place I could think of where I could really clear my head; the shop. I had my own keys and John wouldn’t care so I figured I’d get a head start on Brian’s very expensive piece of shit Beemer.
As much as I loved working with Danny and John, it never compared to being there all alone. I never felt more at peace than when it was just me and the car. Everything was so quiet and I could really just let my mind run any direction it felt it needed to go. Of coarse today it immediately ran in the direction of the city, or, city boys anyway.
I’ve never really been one to be boy crazy and I’m not sure if that’s really what this was, but no question about it, those boys were driving me fucking crazy! Somehow, ever since they showed up I don’t seem to know which end is up and I can’t figure out why. It’s not like I even like any of them. Sure that AJ guy is fine and I’d fuck him in a heartbeat, but I’ve seen him what, twice? We haven’t even been introduced. At least not that I can remember. And Nick, so not my type at all and yet we end up sleeping together? What’s that about? Then there’s Howie. I don’t think I need to remind you why he has me going nuts.
Even more than just these guys showing up and turning my life upside down, I was bothered by something else; a deeper issue. Something about those guys made me think. The way they talked to me, and treated me, they were like no one I’ve ever met before. I couldn’t help but wonder how different life outside of Hanley really was.
All the sudden I was questioning everything about my life. What the fuck was I still doing in this town anyway? I’m 28 years old and still living in a shitty trailer with my mom. Those guys were my age. That Nick guy actually looked younger than me. They all had so much and Brian had a fucking family already.
What was I doing with my life? Nothing. I was pissing it away with Danny and John and never even questioned whether or not there was more out there. What did I want out of life? Did I want a husband and children like Brian had? Did I want a better job or a house of my own? Did I want to see what life was like outside of my tiny little hick town?
Fuck, I don’t know. I mean life’s not so bad. I have Danny and John. We’ll always have fun no matter how shitty things are. And my jobs not so bad. Either of them really. I love cars and working with my two best friends instead of under the watchful eye of some prick of a boss on a power trip is all anyone could ask for. I knew I had it good there. I didn’t even mind the small town. I knew everyone in it and with the exception of my fucked up parents and one or two others like Pete the pervert tow-truck man, they were all pretty good guys.
I guess what was really bothering me was the thought of finding love. I’ve always just ignored the idea because I knew there was no way in hell I would find it with anyone in this fucking town. I’d all but accepted that Danny, John and I would live out the rest of our pitiful lives together but alone.
But the truth is, although I would never admit it to anyone, I wanted love. Real honest to god, spend the rest of your life with the same man, love. Seeing Brian’s face light up when he showed me the picture of his wife made me feel jealous. I wanted that. I wanted to be able to make love to a man, not just have meaningless sex, however hot it may be. Pathetically, the way Howie touched me the other day in the hallway of the fucking Ritz Carlton was the closest I’ve ever come to that. God it felt so good. Ever since then I just can’t stop thinking about how much I want to be in love. I’m desperate for it.
I’m also completely terrified of it. It didn’t work out so well for my mom and I don’t exactly have the best luck in the world. I’ve got more trust issues than a fucking parole officer. I wouldn’t even know where to start to let someone get close enough to love them. Shit I’m probably not even capable of loving someone; not like that. “Fuck it.”
That’s right, those quotation marks are supposed to be there. I said that out loud. Don’t act so surprised, who the fuck doesn’t talk to themselves every now and then? “Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!” I continued to spat from underneath the jacked up car. “Fuck them! Fuck them all! I don’t fucking need them. I don’t fucking need him.”
Yup, spouting profanity to myself was really helping. I was starting to feel better already. “You know what? Fuck Howie! Fuck Howie and his fucking soft touch! Fuck his sweet smile and his fucking miracle hangover juice!” Ok wait, don’t fuck the miracle juice, that I could use, but fuck the rest of it!
“Um, excuse me? Hello?”
The voice was tiny and sounded nervous, but it came out of nowhere and totally scared the piss out of me. Even lying flat on my back I jumped sky high. Unfortunately, the underbelly of Brian’s car was a lot closer than the sky and I smacked into it with full force. “Fuck!” I screamed dropping the tools in my hand with a loud clanking noise.
“I’m really sorry to bother you, but, um, there was no one in the office…”
The woman’s voice trailed off when I slid out from under the car. She shyly took a step back and although she was nervous she smiled the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen. She was fucking angelic looking. She had this long radiant blonde hair that fell perfectly around her shoulders and it seemed to be glowing. I’m pretty sure it was just my eyes adjusting to the light that was shining over her shoulders. Either way it didn’t take a genius to figure out that this was the picture perfect model wife of the ever so charming owner of a certain broken down BMW.
I had to admit, even though she intimidated the shit out of me, I was curious as hell to meet her. Her hair was curled, her nails manicured, and her skirt matched her jacket and her shoes. High fucking heels! I wonder if she always looks like that?
I glanced down at my grease stained garage overalls looking for a clean place to wipe my hands off. “You have to be Leighanne.”
I was surprised when she shook my dirty hand without even hesitating. She was surprised by my comment but her face lit up with excitement. I think she was relieved that I wasn’t going to bite her head off or something. “Yeah, that’s me. And you’re the infamous Cindy. Your reputation precedes you.”
“Ihear it can do that sometimes.”
“Are you kidding? Ever since the guys got here I don’t think we’ve had a conversation that didn’t include you.”
At this point I cringed. God only knows what they’ve told her about me. “Sorry if I caused a ruckus. I know a couple of them probably aren’t very happy with me right now.”
I was surprised that such a big laugh came from such a small body. “Oh my God!” she laughed in a deep southern accent, “I’ve never seen Nick so pissed. And AJ and Howie surely didn’t help with all the laughing and the teasing and the name-calling.”
I was glad she found it all so amusing. After all, Nick was her husband’s best friend. I was worried that she’d be a little upset, but she thought it was hysterical. That surprised me. If it was me and Danny got pummeled by a girl like that you bet your ass I’d think it was funny. Especially if he deserved it. I’d give him all kinds of hell for it. But that’s me and I ain’t exactly all prim and proper like she is.
“Can I tell you something? Just between us girls?” Leighanne asked still giggling a little.
I was right about the giggling thing, Leighanne seemed to be an expert at it. And now she was gossiping with me. Shit, this sounded like girl talk and she’d only been there for two minutes. She was the most feminine woman I’d ever met. I felt my skin starting to crawl and normally this would be the part where I found an excuse to get the hell out of there, but I was so curious about what she could possibly have to tell me.
The only thing we had in common was her husband and his city boy friends and I was dying to hear what she had to say about them. I stared curiously as she looked around the garage. It was like she was afraid someone might here us or something. Then she giggled again. “I was kind of glad when the guys told me what happened to Nick.”
Kind of glad? Was this guy that big of a prick that his best friend’s wife was happy someone knocked the shit out of him? This woman was a very strange creature. I could see it in her eyes that she felt guilty about what she was saying and yet at the same time she was trying not to laugh.
I couldn’t figure her out for nothing. She was the poster child for all the things I hate about girls and yet I didn’t automatically loathe her. It was kind of like she was some fairy princess on the outside and had this inner wild-child screaming to get out. “I love Nick to death but he’s got one of the biggest egos I’ve ever seen.” She explained to me, again suppressing her own laughter, “He shouldn’t have done what he did to you but normally he can get away with it. I’m glad someone finally put him in his place.”
“Happy I could be of some assistance then.” I joked.
“We should keep you around more often.” Leighanne said no longer holding back from her laughter, “They could all use a little deflation sometimes.”
“Not Brian.”
Leighanne laughed even harder. “Yup, even Brian. That just happens when you spend so many years getting everything you want. He’s just not as bad as the others because he has me to burst his bubble, and trust me, I’ve done it plenty.”
“Yeah right. If Brian has an ego, you’re the reason for it. He should just wear that picture of you around his neck as much as he takes it out of his wallet.”
Leighanne blushed and a grotesque smile spread across her face as she thought about her loving husband. Those two were sick. Is it even possible for two people to be so happy? I would have thought no, but these two were fucking crazy. Leighanne snapped from her daydream and grinned wickedly at me, “Well you know how it is to be cursed with so much beauty.”
Was she serious? I can’t even count how many things were wrong with that statement. And why the hell was she shaking her finger at me? “Don’t you dare try to deny it.” She said, “I’m sure you have every man in this town at your disposal.”
“Huh?” I wish I could have been a little bit more articulate but I was fucking confused. Was she blind?
“You are every bit as pretty as I am.”
Oh god somebody help me, this woman was completely psycho! And she was doing that girl thing where they tell each other how pretty they are just because they can. Maybe I was wrong about her. Maybe she really was just another girlie-girl.
I had no idea how to respond to that statement. I mean look at me, I could never compare to someone like her and I wasn’t about to say that I could. But I didn’t need to go fishing for compliments either so I didn’t want to deny it. I was completely flustered and did the only thing I could think of, I changed the subject. “Is there something you needed?”
“Yeah, the guys left my gown in the car and I was hoping I could get it before it starts to smell. Knowing those guys, there’s probably a half eaten cheeseburger under the seat fusing the smell of grease permanently into my Versachi.”
Gown? Versachi? Oh my god. Who the hell was this woman, Julia Roberts? I opened the door for her and she pulled out a long garment bag. Her face lit up as she unzipped it. “I can’t wait to wear it! Brian’s foundation is holding a charity ball this Friday.” She said showing me the dress as if I were as excited about it as she was... And her goddamned giggle was back. “I’ll admit it was a little expensive, but I have to make my hubby proud. He’s put so much work into this event.”
Now the princess was talking about a ball! Rich people and their fucking fairy tale lives! Maybe I should be calling her Cnderella. The dress she was holding was beautiful though and for a moment I wondered what it would be like to wear something like that. I couldn’t imagine how much she must have spent on it. Probably more than I make in a year. Even I wouldn’t look to bad in something like that.
I wondered about the dress just a second too long and when Leighanne’s eyes narrowed at me I groaned on the inside. Damn. She wasn’t just beautiful she was smart to. She knew exactly what I was thinking. “That rough exterior doesn’t fool me honey. Every girl deserves to feel beautiful. You know, if we cleaned you up a little you would knock the socks off of any man.”
Oh God! I was blushing. What the hell was wrong with me? I beat up chicks who say shit like that, not blush from the compliment. Either this woman was casting some sort of magical spell over me, or I just wasn’t nearly as tough as I used to be.
Sadly, I knew it was the second. I had nearly cried two or three times in the last couple days. I don’t know what was causing the change inside me, but I was scared of it. I didn’t know how to be a girl. I didn’t know how to be friends with a girl. And I didn’t know how I would go on with my life if I turned into one, but I found myself fucking curious what it would be like if I were a little more like Leighanne.
Leighanne’s face lit up suddenly and she began hopping up and down squealing giddily. “Oh my God I have the best idea!” she said grabbing both of my hands as she continued her hopping. Ok, maybe I didn’t want to be that much like her.
I pulled my hands away before I could start jumping up and down with her. Seriously, this woman was slightly crazy. “Let’s go into town today for some girl time. I’ve been desperate to find a salon since we moved. We’ll go shopping and have full makeovers done. I haven’t done that in so long!”
“I don’t think so.” I said trying not to laugh. Spending time with another girl was one thing, but shopping and salons and makeovers? Hell no!
“Aw come on, you have to! My treat, I’m going to prove to you that you are gorgeous.”
“I’m not gorgeous.”
Fuck! There I go. I’m doing it. I’m refusing her compliment. I sound so fucking insecure. Now she’s never going to let up. “Look I appreciate it, but let’s face it, I just ain’t worth the hassle.”
“Howie doesn’t think so.” Leighanne said grinning wickedly at me.
I froze and my face turned beat red. I wanted to kick myself for being so goddamned obvious, but I couldn’t help it. Howie had me so twisted up inside that just the mention of his name turned me into an emotional wreck.
When Leighanne saw my reaction she smiled victoriously. I was busted. “But I have work I’ve got to finish.” I tried to protest but Leighanne only grew more confident.
“The sign out front says you’re closed, and that’s my car your working on and I say it can wait.”
I was desperately trying to think of more excuses but I just couldn’t. In fact, my brain actually began trying to sway me the other direction. After all, I did have to go into town to pick up my mother anyway, and I would probably never have another chance in my life to do anything like this. Plus, just yesterday I was so desperate for a girl to talk to that I resorted to my mother. Maybe Leighanne wouldn’t be so bad after all.
Leighanne smiled when she realized she’d gotten her way. She anxiously waited for me to close up the shop. I didn’t have a clue what the hell was about to happen to me but as much as I hated to admit it, I was kind of excited.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Hehehe, things are about to get really interesting! I'll try and update as soon as I can. Hope you like!
