The next morning I woke up to knocking…very loud knocking. I opened one eye, let out a groan, and opened the other. I noticed I was in my bed fully dressed and I sighed with relief.

“I’m coming!” I hollered, recognizing my own room. I didn’t really remember how I had gotten home. It didn’t really matter. Right now I was going to kill whoever was knocking like the police at my door.

Running my fingers through my messy hair, I stormed over to the door and swung it open. “What the…”

“Yo…you take forever to open the door sis.” Nick stood at the door slurping on frapuccino from Starbucks. He was in a pair of khaki shorts, a black shirt that read ‘eat me’ and a pair of flip flops. His hair was all over the place, and it looked like he had gotten plastered last night.

“Stupid! Did you have to knock like a lunatic.”

“Dude I’m freezing out here.” He pouted, and threw a bag into the apartment. “I’m here to invade you. The family just left. So I thought I’d make you company. You need company right lil sis?”

I rolled my eyes and held the door open, “You are a moron. You are cold cause your wearing California attire, when it’s like freakin fifty degrees here. Plus you’re drinking a frap.” I scolded him, taking the plastic cup from his hand and slurping up the remains.

“Not cool.” He smiled. “So how did it go with Frankenstein last night?”

I shrugged, “The same as always. He’s stubborn.”

Nick was giving me a stupid grin. “You guys…”

“What?”

He nudged my shoulder, “Didn’t get it on last night?”

My eyes went wide in horror. “What the hell are you talking about? Of course not!” I gave him a smack on the shoulder and one on the head. “Where the hell did you come up with that?”

He began to laugh hysterically “Oh please…we all know you two have been doing the nasty, ever since we were kids.”

Warmth crept onto my cheeks and many other areas, as I realized that we hadn’t been as discrete as we thought. Shit!

Once again he began to laugh, “Wow you just confirmed it. You’re like red as a tomato dude. Good thing it’s not considered incest or it’d be some sick shit and like we grew up in hickville.”

I smacked him again, this time harder. “Shut up and take these things to the other room. Or I‘ll send you to stay with Howie and a pregnant, moody Leigh.”

There was another knock at the door, and Alex peered into the apartment. “Hey!”

Nick was making way down the hall, as he hollered out “USE PROTECTION!” and slammed the door behind him.

Before Alex and I could react to his outburst, DJ came waltzing into my apartment. “Aunt Sophie you have to come with us.” He was huffing and puffing, eagerly. “We are going to play paintball battle, you have to come with us. Please.” After a couple of seconds, he acknowledge Alex. “Hey Uncle Alex…you should come too.”

I loved all my nieces and nephews, but DJ was my total favorite. He was just like his father, such a free spirit. Who got along with everyone and their momma. Plus, it could have been the age. He was old enough to act like a normal human being, without totally embarrassing me by throwing himself into a fit on the store floor, over skittles. And most importantly he knew how to wipe his own butt.

“I don’t know if your father wants me there DJ.” Alex tucked his hands into his pockets, and looked at the floor. I could tell that he was embarrassed of his display last night.

DJ rolled his eyes, “My dad is over that…plus you just busted his lip. No harm done.“ he stuck out his bottom lip, put his hands into prayer form and tilted his head. “Come on you guys!”

“Where are we headed?” Nick questioned, coming back into the living room in a pair of army pants, a black long sleeve shirt and sneakers. The twosome began a conversation amongst themselves, about how they were going to pick teams, and who was going to kick who’s butt.

Meanwhile I pulled Alex into my room and questioned him about last night. He was grinning like a fool, as he fixed his trucker cap. “Nothing happened. I think I passed out, as soon as you dropped me off. You didn’t even come up.”

“Oh…” I mumbled, annoyed at the sound of disappointment in my voice. I began to walk out, but he pulled me back by the arm. “What?” I questioned, standing in front of him.

“Are you…” he took a step closer, to where our chest were pressed against each other. I swallowed hard, it was scary when he got too close for comfort. It was moments like this, that weakened me. “…scared to be alone with me?” his hand slipped under the seam of my pants. He brushed his fingers back and forth under my belly button.

I was melting.

My cheeks, neck and private regions were pulsing and having hot flashes. “Stop…” I demanded weakly. His hand dug in deeper, and I felt his fingers slip into my area. “Alex…” I felt a moan involuntarily escape my mouth, as he moved his fingers back and forth.

Ten minutes later, I was in the bathroom all flustered and out breath. Cursing myself for letting him work his magic fingers on me. Sometimes, that was more than enough from him. The only problem I had with it at the moment, was that I had given him proof...that I still had feelings for him.

When I walked back out, everyone went silent as I entered the living room. Quickly my cheeks flushed. I felt like they all knew. I turned to look at Alex, who had his hands in his pockets and was grinning like a fool.

Howie shook his head, “Seriously you two. You could at least wait till we are out of here. Sheesh. Come on DJ.”

“What are you talking about?” I questioned him, although I knew better than anyone what the hell he was talking about. “You know?”

He turned around, and began to laugh in unison with Alex and Nick “Of course, it’s been pretty obvious Sophia. I don’t really care…hey you two aren’t blood related. But I’ll tell you that dad would and will have a fucking fit.”

My mouth was wide open, as I stood there dumbstruck watching DJ, Howie and Nick make way down the hall. With furrowed brows, I looked up at Alex for some type of answer.

He cleared his throat, and scratched the back of his head. “I might have told him, the first time we did it. I had too…Soph. It’s a guy thing. I had to tell someone…about my encounter.”

With a huff, I let Alex have my right fist in the side of the eye. He bent forward, cursing up a storm. “Shit! What the fuck was that for?”

“For being such a guy. I can’t believe you told him. All these years he’s known about it. Tell me you didn’t give him all the details?” I stood there, with my hip sticking out and my arms crossed over my chest. If only my eyes had rays, I could have zapped him to death. I was mortified that my older brother knew about my first sexual encounter. “Aaaaaaaah!” I yelled, storming out of the apartment.

“Babe…you busted my eye here.” he hollered at me from the apartment. I ignored him and continued walking. Men are so stupid. They make me so mad.

Why can’t I find a nice and decent guy? UGH!

Almost three hours later we were all walking out of the Boneyard Paintball field. We had blotches of blue and some yellow on our uniforms. Yes, we had uniforms that Alex and his side jobs had provided us. I mean, full gear. Pants, long sleeve shirts, vests, masks, guns…the whole shebang. We did this every year. We just kept losing players as the years went by. Almost two years back, my dad, Brian and Leighanne accompanied us and Nick was too far to join. Now they were replaced by, guys from the precinct and sometimes their older kids.

I knew I wasn’t the only one in pain, we had all been pelted good at least once. Good enough to leave a mark, especially Nick.

“Shit” Nick groaned, hopping into the back of the escalade. He scooted himself carefully on the leather seat and covered his package with a big bag of ice.

“I’m so sorry uncle Nick. I didn’t mean to…” DJ tried to put a straight face, but he wasn’t doing a good job of it.

Nick gave him a deadly glare, “No worries little man. I checked and everything is still intact…sore…but I still have my nads.”

Howie was the first to burst out laughing, then Alex and lastly me. The moment was priceless. The battle was over, and DJ was shooting out at the trees. Nick being the lazy dummy that he is, decided that taking a leak by a tree was more convenient than walking his ass to the bathrooms. So in DJ’s random shooting, Nick happened to be blasted with a yellow paintball…right in the nuts!

“Ha…ha…ha…very funny!” He snapped.

“Man, you have to admit it was fucking funny. The way you screamed like a bitch and ran out from behind the tree with your pants around your ankles, holding your dick!”

Alex was in a fit of laughter, as he drove out of the parking lot.

I can’t help to stare when he does that. It’s not to often lately. His eyes drifted over to me, and I flushed knowing he had caught me staring. Shoot. “Um…so is anyone…else hungry?” I questioned, looking at the threesome in the back seat.

“Oh yeah!” DJ piped, “How about some In N Out?” he added, already savoring a burger.

A burger sounded good right about now, with fries and some of their special dressing. Ugh. DJ always did that to me. Anytime I was around him, I always ended up eating like a pig. “I’m in!”

“Me too…” Nick groaned, shifting in his seat.

Alex let out a breath, “Um…not to be the spoiler of fun guys. I’m not exactly welcomed in that part of town.”

I whipped my head around “What do you mean not welcomed? What cop isn’t welcomed in...?” Maybe I was new at all this. But to me the only way he wasn’t welcome, was if he had done something. Something bad. I was dying to ask. But I wanted to save him from the scolding from Howie. I could already see the older man's brain gears in motion.

“It’s cool though. I’ll wait in the car.” He suggested quickly, as we drove the rest of the way in silence.

Alex parked and shut off the engine, he adjusted himself and handed me money. “I’m fine!” I muttered, pushing his hand away.

“Just take it!”

A small hand snatched the hundred dollar bill from his hand, “Thank you!” DJ chuckled and climbed over his father to get out of the truck.

“You teach him well!” Alex teased Howie, looking at him through the rearview mirror.

“You seem to have money coming out of your ass right?” Howie snapped.

Round one. I was out of there, I did not want to hear them going back and forth. Usually it ended up in a ‘I’m a good cop…you’re a bad cop’ thing and I wanted to believe that they were both good. In a rather odd way I understood Alex’s worry about this place.

We were pretty much in the ghetto.

Trash littered the streets. There were odd names spray painted on random walls, some with big X’s on them. I didn’t understand what the hell that meant. The worst part about this place was the bald guys with tattoos all over their bodies. Clowns. Naked women in sombreros. Crosses. Names; in cursive writing. Tears on their faces. I tried not to stare, but just getting a glimpse at them. I could see all that ink.

“Heya baby!” one of them shouted in his gangsta tone. He was big and bald. With a goatee and a ripple of muscles all over his body. I could guess off the bat, he’d been to the pen. “eh…come over here and talk to me ay.”

I eyes focused on the door and held on to DJ’s shoulder with one hand. “Don’t say a word and keeping walking DJ.” I whispered.

“Ok. Maybe this WAS a bad idea.” he responded.

We got into the place with no problem, but I couldn’t help to check every other second if they had left already. Why was I scared anyways? I deal with people like that all the time. I shouldn’t be scared by now, I’ve been on the job almost four months. Fuck the four months. I could never get used to cholos and from what I knew. None of them were nice.

Within ten minutes our order was ready and we grabbed all our stuff. DJ and I made eye contact. He looked as scared as I did. Now that I thought about it, I was more afraid of knowing I had three grown men in the truck. Two whom were probably armed at the time, watching our every move. Which meant this could get ugly.

Letting out a deep sigh, I guided DJ out and before I could have a chance to open the door. A torrent of gunshots arose from all directions. “DJ” I yelled as we dropped to the floor. I hovered over him protectively.

I could hear screaming, glass shattering, tires screeching and shuffling of people around me. It felt like forever, before the echoing of shots even came to a stop.

“DJ! Holy shit!” Howie’s voice, brought me back to the moment as I stared at DJ…his eyes were closed and there was red all over his clothes.

Holy shit! My little man wasn't breathing.