It was just like another ordinary day. I woke up brushed my teeth, got dressed. Then went and let the dog out, checked my emails; Not responding to any of them.

I sighed as I swallowed the lump in my throat, and tried to blink back the tears that where threatening to fall down my cheeks.

I looked at my phone and I had 31 missed calls,I look at the caller ID press delete and listen to my voicemails. They were all from them, they act like they understand but they really have no idea.

They weren't there how could they understand I don't even understand. Nobody was there. How could a busy street have no one there, I used to have everything. The fancy car, diamond ring, a smile that would light up the room, a future a husband. That was all taken away by flashing lights.

It has been 3 months since the accident, they call it an accident but I call it man slaughter. 'Did they really need to take the bottle of pills and go for a drive? Kill my Fiance and my un-born child, They say its hard moving on from something like this but hard doesn't even begin to explain it.

They say im lucky to be alive.... What do I live for? Everyday I look at the home  Lucas and his brother built with there bare hands and the memories that come along with it. As I walk through the rooms of the largely decorated house. I stop at Ayla's room, probably the hardest room to go into. We painted her room yellow just incase alya turned out to be a boy, turns out im left with nothing.

Everyday I feel like I have been burried alive by grief... I hate that I can't talk to anyone because I don't how to respond, Im really fucking sick and tired of hearing everything happens for a reason. I can't look at anyone, everyone reminds me of them. I just really needed to get away, I know I would be missed and its un-belivably selfish of me but sometimes you just need to escape.

So I left my goodbye note on the kitchen table and left my identity with it. I was moving on because if I have to wake up feeling like this, I know it would be the begining to an end.

I smashed the engagement photo on cold blue ceramic tile and watched as the picture shattered into a bunch of shared glass. I took the photo out of the frame taking the photo with me I placed it in my purse. I left my cell phone, left a tear stained individually written goodbye note  to all my friends and family explaining why. Telling them someday I would see them again. I left my car keys, took the the money from my bank account ready to start over, leaving Lucas' family all of his assetts and belongings.

hearing my house phone ring, seeing that once again, it was my mother calling to check in. Little did she know, I was checking out. I sighed grabbed my rain jacket put on my boots and a duffel bag full of belongings, kept the door unlocked grabbed my dog and left my hometown in the rearview mirror of the taxi cab and didn't look back.

6 Months later-  Sophia’s POV

It wasn’t easy leaving everything I knew behind, but it was getting easier. Sometimes I have these small reminders like a song on the radio, or flashbacks whenever I hear sirens.  I am learning to deal and cope with this lonliness I have created.  I have called my parents just long enough to hear their voices, to make sure they are okay. I don’t think they know it is me because, I never say anything I just listen to there breathing to ease my fears that they will be taken away from me too, until I hear a dail tone and the breathing stops. I hope they know I love them.

I am going to a support group every Thursday.  Sometimes it’s really hard to listen to their stories.  Some of the stories are about addiction, addiction to drugs, sex, love.  Other times the stories are about loss, losing someone or something very important to them. Although, these stories are really upsetting to hear; sometimes it makes me feel like I’m not as pathetic as I feel. Other times I feel like im surrounded by family who love and appreciate me, even though I don’t feel as I love and appreciate myself.

I clap as the last speaker of the evening enters the stage. “When are you going  up to the hot seat?” Rochelle whispered to me with inquiring eyes. “I Dunno” I shrugged my shoulders in response. Rochelle is the wife of one of the members here. 

Her husband is the guy who is up there talking now, he is full of tattoos and skull jewellery in my past life he is someone I would be weary to get to know. I have learned never to judge a book by its cover because he is one of the most honest, and caring people I have ever heard speak, he is very charismatic.

Rachelle and I have became… well she is probably my only 'girl-friend' here. Although, she knows nothing about me really or my past, I keep myself pretty closed up. I know they say I should talk about it, but to be honest it just hurts to damn much to think about it anymore than I have to. She knows what I want her to know and I think she gets that. She knows I was married and it ended badly and she knows I live on Riekard Avenue in an apartment with my dog.

My thoughts were taken back to the tattooed man on stage I think his name is Alexander? I met him awhile ago but I am not so great with names. “ Today I am celebrating three years sobierty, I couldn’t have done it without the support of my everything, my rock, my baby, my beautiful wife- Rochelle, or my Mother, or my Brothers, most importantly my baby girl Ava. She is my reason she needs me to be her rock, so I need to continue to be strong.”

Alexander’s eyes were filling up with water, making his chocolate brown eyes shine. He put his hands in the air “If I can do it all of you can beat your deamons too.”  He looked so happy , I don’t remember the last time I felt that happy.

The room exploded with a round of applause and cheers. The acoustics made it sound like a thunder storm with rain hitting the tin roof.  I stood up alongside Rochelle and clapped, Alexander came down and picked up Rochelle and spung her around in a circle.

I heard Rochelle whisper “ Im so proud of you Monkey.” Alexander hugged her tighter.

“Congratulations on three years Alexander”. I put my hand up for a high five, but he pulled me into a hug. I was quickly learning this guy wore his heart on his sleeve.

“Thank you So…” He stammered

“Sophia, don’t worry about it im not so great with names either.”  I smiled “Congratulations again, I will see you two next week then?” As I grabbed my coat off of the back of the chair, judging by the darkness of the sky it was a good thing I brought my umbrella as well.

*** “Sophia…call me A.J, my friends call me A.J.”  A.J helped Rachelle put on her jacket like a gentleman. I smiled as I watched the couple in front of me Jealousy rang through me. I tried not to let it show, I mean it is un-believably cute to watch them. It just hurts knowing that I had that before, before the accident I sighed to myself.

Not realizing that Rochelle and AJ were still talking to me “ So what do you say, do you want to come celebrate with us?”

I shook my head, to get rid of my thoughts. I could tell by the temperature of my body that I must have turned a lovely shade of pink. I didn’t want to seem like a complete idiot so I just said yes. I had no idea what I said yes too.

“Great” Rochelle replied happily and clapped her hands together. “Were leaving now to meet some friends at Club Cobra you can follow us there if you want” AJ put on his sunglasses and fedora leopard print hat as we walked outside.

I couldn’t help but smile, its been a long time since I have been out and it might be fun.  This weather wasn’t the epitome of fun though it hasn’t rained in LA in 4 weeks, and of course today of all days it decides to pour.

“ I don’t drive ill just catch a cab and meet you there.” I yelled over the sound of heavy rain hitting the pavement.  “Don’t be silly Sophia just come with us”. Rochelle replied grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the Pearl white Escalade parked in the parking lot.

I got into the vehicle and the new car smell took over my senses, I watched as the cars passed us by I quietly sat in the back as Rochelle and A.J chatted amongst themselves in the front seat, as low music played in the background I couldn’t help but smile as I silently sang the all familiar words in my head, as I remembered our last dance together.

 It was our wedding song at our wedding, but this was before the wedding we were practicing our dance moves. He picked me up and twirled me around as the song started to play.  Lucas wasn’t really a romantic guy, but he sure did make it romantic this night. We were dancing by the ocean, the waves came crashing up hitting our toes making our toes dig a little further.  We swayed in time together. Matching each others step, each others movement. It was so perfect it is a memory I never want to forget. The stars were shining bright his hands wrapped around my waist, our little girl dancing in my belly, feeling little flutters as her daddy brushes his fingers against my belly.

I jumped out of my skin hearing AJ honking his horn with his head out the window yelling "Three years sober today. Time to parrrrtttyyy."   As we pulled up to the Club I noticed all the cameras and girls holding up signs saying congratulations I recongized the E- Entertainment news van. Somehow I knew this was going to be a night I soon wouldn’t forget. I just hoped I could do this. I know some might think Im crazy its just a club but for me it is the first time being out without him, without Lucas.

Nicks POV

I was so proud of A.J I couldn’t believe he was here and he made it to three years without a single substance; he is even against energy drinks now. Apparently, there is someone in his support group, who got addicted to energy drinks. I mean I have heard of it before but I mean I think it’s a little obsessive, to be honest I’m not even completely against the green a couple times a year.

Okay, so I know A.J is going to be a little umm say surprised. I kind of invited everyone on his twitter feed.  He should not leave me to the party planning. I mean when do I plan parties? Come on, I go to parties but I have never planned them other than a Bucs blow out, or my gaming buddies. They choose to be left anonymous some of them are people you would never imagine.

So looking around it’s a little mixed and if I was thinking clearly I would have looked at some of these peoples profiles. Some of the ladies are looking fine, and I am a married man, not to mention some of these people look scary kind of like A.J’s old crew if you know what I mean.

As I scan the crowd further I continue having conversations with myself,  my old therapist told me its normal and it is my outlet in stressful  situations . It’s how I process things.  She said I only have to worry when they start talking back. She said this with such a straight face I am still not sure if she was serious or joking.

Anyways, long story short A.J may be a little pissed, I kind of feel like a kid in one of those old teenage movies that got caught having a party. I mean the only instructions he gave me is it has to have some good boogying music. I mean who says boogying besides Kevin and Howie.

“Congratulations A.J, we are so proud of you”. I wrapped my arm around A.J as he walked towards me. “Carter, I am going to kill you”. Through gritted teeth. “Let’s just get inside before I get skinned alive.” A.J couldn’t help but smile at the look on Nicks face. He looked like a puppy that just got caught with a shoe. “It’s the thought that counts right?” A.J rubbed his hands together, “I always did like a good party.”

Sophia’s POV

The image in front of me reminded me so much of Lucas and James relationship you know the one the love/hate relationship from what Rochelle tells me they have been like this for years. I guess these were the kind of feelings I was going to have to learn to bury.

I walked quietly behind Rachelle as we were lead to the VIP table. I couldn’t help but notice the stares and daggers I was getting as I walked by. I am wondering if I am just being paranoid I mean, this is the city its LA why I choose to come to this cesspool of a city I am still not sure I looked at a map and decided this is where I was going to go, and here I am.

As I made eye contact I noticed that okay middle fingers and daggers not so paranoid. When we finally reached our table and got all situated. There were about 30 of us sitting at the VIP table, while there  were another 500 people inside the club, and another 500 people watching our every move. Okay, So I may be paranoid but there are camera crews and magazine articles.

So I have been pretty quiet just sitting here we did the introductory thing, glad to know the awkwardness of that hasn’t changed. I laughed to myself, maybe a little too loud, I don’t think I should have had that 3rd glass of wine before supper, did I just hiccup. I have 60 eyes looking at me literally; I wonder quietly to myself I have been talking out loud.

Sophia's POV

“So what’s your story, you’re obviously not from around here, look at you. Did you really get in here wearing that…she said pointing at me and laughing.” You must be the charity case everyone is talking about are you from make a wish foundation.” Now all eyes were on her I mean from what I understand her and friend won some kind of contest. I looked her up and down trust me she was nothing to brag about, if you like plastic in a Nike Manage kind of way then yea she’s a looker.

Now I know why I haven’t picked up a drink in 6 months, apparently when you’re depressed you become a not so nice drunk. I mean I’m not drunk I had a few drinks and I wouldn’t drive because it’s the law, not because I didn’t think I was capable. I couldn’t stop the words from flowing out of my mouth; it was like word vomit I couldn’t stop it. I felt like I was stuck in an episode of a reality TV show.

“You’re being incredibly rude for someone who looks like you, I was invited here” Okay so maybe it didn’t come out as rude as I thought it did, but my parents brought me up right.

"What do you mean look like me?" All the guys wanna get with this, she stood up and shook her poorly done boob job at all the table. I ouldn't help but laugh at the situation, I mean if she wants to compare boob sizes I have her beat in spades and my assets weren't paid for by a Hugh Heffner wannabee. "In fact I was with your man last night."

She brought up my husband and I fucking snapped, I lost it. Any sense of self control was out the fucking window, and if she wasn't carefull I might just put her through one. In fact the big window right infront of me would be just perfect.  I thought to myself, I really hoped I wasn't speaking out loud this time..

"I highly doubt that" I scoffed at the idea I shook my head and I didn't need to take this. Who in the hell does this bitch think she is. She should just drop it if she knows what is best for her.

"You know what we are runing Alexanders party. If you want to fight with me lets take this outside this really isn't the time or place. I think we have embarassed ourselves for one night."

'Ohh no I can feel it coming I thought to myself, not now no hold it together Sophia, just a little bit longer. I coashed myself already knowing it was too late. I was trying my damndest to swallow the lump in my throat and water, I really needed water' 

This was the breaking point she had the audacity to come right in my face, and wave her curly red fake nails in my face. "Your husband was with me all night, and he talked about how pathetic you are, and that you don't play games in the bedroom like a real woman does."

I looked at the table they looked like they were on the edge of their seats, so I never hit anyone in my life. Today could possibly be the day, and it would feel amazing. "You know what DeeDee back off, drop it".

"Make Me Bitch, yall want to be starting something with me, your husband wants to leave you he told me over, and over again as he was making me scream his name."

"Thats it" I went over to her and grabbed her by the Hair and pulled part of her weave out. I have a problem with people like you who are so disrespectful. If you have a problem with me then say it or get out of my fucking face. I said inches away from her face. I felt the ohh so familar wentness on my cheeks. Damn it why is it whenever I get really mad I cry.

"Ohh look shes crying she take the heat from DeeDee." DeeDee I know you have shit for brains, and like to refer to yourself in third person. But take a hint and drop it, before I give you another poorly done nose job."

"Your just upset your husband is leaving you for me."

at that moment I lunged for her and I was thankfull that A.J and the blonde pulled me back. They let me go once they saw the threat of me killing her has subsided for the moment.

"DeeDee, you know what I don't you any kind of explanation. For your information my husband already left me." Tears were streaming down my face, I raised my voice.

DeeDee looked at the table, and said "Yah for me."

I started clapping my hands together. I stood up on the chair "Everyone give DeeDee here a round of applause. Isn't she fucking lovely". I raised my voice at the next part. I was screaming and had tears streaming down my face. I was suprised I could even speak words. Then her dumb fucking friend started clapping her hands. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle dumb right there.

I have kept everything bottled up for months and I was ready to explode, I tried to keep my cool, I tried not to make a scene.  Trying was over fucking rated, who cares if these were the first people I really associated with in the last six months. At work they call me a mute, if they could only see me now. Mute this Bitch.

I could taste the salt water on my lips, and feel the wetness on my cheeks. It felt good to scream and it felt good to let it out. I was so angry and hurt I wasn’t thinking straight.

I softened my voice “You know why you weren’t with my husband last night.” I got close enough to her as I could I heard the blonde man whisper “Not here Sophia, you don’t want to do this here.”

“Unless you died and went to heaven, which I know you are not going to end up there. Or you learned how to time travel, or you dug up my husband’s grave you weren’t with him, and you certainly did not fuck him last night.”

"Because he is dead and he is never coming back to me, and if he did come back he sure as hell would not associate with the likes of you. You stupid dumb fucking blonde.  You are the ugliest person on the inside I have ever met with the worse boob job, and nose job. You are what is wrong in today’s world, I hope you look in the mirror and like who you have become. I don’t understand why someone like you is still alive and my un-born child and husband are gone.

I was still being held on to tightly “I noticed the look of Sympathy on Rochelle's face.” I heard the gasps in the back ground. It was like an unexpected twist to a fucked up movie, I felt like I was in movie right now; in fact it has felt like I have been playing in a movie for months…I really wanted this scene to be over, in-fact it was never going to be over. Like a cd player stuck on repeat one.

I was still being held on tightly by the Blonde stranger and A.J wasn’t holding me back anymore he had me pulled to his side and he was hugging me. I pushed the hair off my forehead and I just couldn’t hold my ground any longer. “He is gone and I don’t know how to go on without him”. I moaned into the strangers arms as I collapsed. "I miss Lucas' So much." I squeezed the blondes shirt in between my fingers.

“You need to go” A.J said to Deedee. “Thank you for being a fan of our music, but get the fuck out of my sight.” 

Another man I think his name was Kevin was talking to the reporters and basically paying them off, and shooing them out. Most of the reporters handed over the tapes no problem, I guess there really are some good people left in this world.

Rochelle ran over to me and wrapped her arms around me “I’m so sorry Sophia” I still had my head on the blonde strangers shoulder.

Yes a night I was never going to forget indeed.

3 Hours Earlier @ Club Cobra

As I looked at my watch for the tenth time this eveing, I realized she once again was not coming. Lauren was always very punctual and on time to anything. She was never one of these fashionably late girls. Which was one of the things I loved about her. There is none of this just five minutes honey. It was never just 5 minutes. Because Lauren had everything perfectly planned. She already had the back up dress planned for an event days ago.

She is perfectly imperfect for me because I am not a planner, I am more of a go with the flow kind of guy. I like things simple and classic. Of course I had my flashy days, (but we wont talk about those days ) Also, I get off topic a lot, my mind runs faster than it can process. So once I start one thing, before I am finished I have already started another. Somedays I don't get very much accomplished because of this. It has always made the fellas a little annoyed with me.

This is how I know Lauren isn't coming tonight you know the saying better late than never... Lauren chooses the never. It doesn't help we got into a pretty huge blow out earlier. It is always about the same thing lately. I never thought I would be the one to want children, I was always the one that never wanted to have kids, or get married. Here I am hitched really wanting one of my own, we have been married for a few years now, and naturally that just seems like the next step to me, to her its all about her career and it is really starting to take off.

I always thought Kitt Fitt was going to be something that was ours, our baby, our something we could do together. Instead Kitt Fitt turned into this huge success, not just overseas but everywheres. It was the biggest you tube sensation since the 'Harlem Shake epic craze, and Justin Beiber'.

Its great and all but it turned out to be more than we could handle on our own so we had to hire a manager, we choose a very capable business person with lots of passion (now im noticing he is a Vin Diesel look alike body builder.) Only hes not only interested in the company he is interested in Lauren. The worst thing is she doesn't even see the way he looks at her. Probably the thing that hurts the most is. She doesn't notice how she looks at him either. I do though, and it hurts. She tells me Im crazy but if I was so crazy wouldn't you think she would be here for our mutual best friends. It is a major accomplishment for A.J.

I sigh as I look at my phone, this has become all to familiar to me. Out at functions having to make up excuses why my wife isn't on my arm. We are just in two completely different places right now literally, she was supposed to be home from the promo in Italy and it turns out her manager Rodderick has to keep her for a few more days.

"Days" I sigh and rub my hands through my newly cut hair. "Days" I say a little louder. I can feel my body temperature rising with every word I read on the text message.

I excuse myself and go throw some water on my face, I look at myself in the mirror and contemplate taking shots and getting completely fucked. I take one last look in the mirror and notice my wedding ring and it makes me more mad. I can't stop but think she is married to me not Roderick. Whenever I think of rodderick, I always think of rotten dick. Thats my secret nic-name for him. Another reason why we were fighting.

Flashback 2 days earlier...

"LoLo, I can't believe you have to go again. You promise your going to make it back for J’s Party, it’s a huge deal for him. Rochelle is your bestfriend, you would think you would want to be there." I said as I watched her pack her bag yet again. I know she has done the same, but now it doesn't seem like she is just going for work. I layed on the bed I couldn't help but admire the simple beauty that radiants from her. She looked like a greek goddess the way the sunlight hit her face.

"You know I love you Right." I smiled up at her, getting up off the dark purple duvet. Grabbing her hands trying to get her to dance with me.

"Nick stop im going be late, Rodderick is picking me up and we are taking his private jet to Italy." Lauren glared at me. " I don't have time for this.-"

I cut her off " What Lauren you don't have time for what, time for me, time for us. What, we barely have had a conversation in 3 weeks. I am all about promotiong your brand.  What about me? Your Husband? We used to be so close and told each other everything. You are my other half, you are the one I want to grow old with". I choked back the stinging in my eyes. "I feel like Im losing you."

I looked into her eyes, I noticed she looked exhausted. She had bags under her eyes " Look Nick, your not losing me. See this ring on my finger, I am yours and you are mine."

She grabbed my hands and kissed my hands " Your stuck with me carter." I smiled and tried to hide the sinking feeling I had in the pit of my stomach I was losing her and not every realtionship ends in heartache. I kept trying to remind myself of this.

I leaned in and kissed her " I know I just miss you, I miss our frisky time." I wiggled my eyebrows at her and she pushed me away giggling, as I tried kissing her collarbone and started at her neck.

"Rodderick....stop I have to pack now, okay I cannot be late." she pushed me away with one shove and fell back onto the bed.

I wasn't sure I heard her right, but the look on her face. She knew she fucked up. She tried to blow it off, but we both knew it was more than that.

"My name isn't Rodderick, Its Nick." I felt like we were just talking in circles. "You tell me to trust you Lauren, you tell me everything is fine." This isn't the first time you said his name. Last time we had sex the night of my birthday party. You moaned his name instead of mine.

"What is going on Lauren, Im a big boy I can handle it."

"Nick, how many times do I have to tell you." She yelled " Nothing is going on" Fuck, I dont interigate you everytime you go half way across the world. Dance and grind for the lonely women in the audience. I trust you, whats the difference?" she said as she packed the last of her things.

I sighed exhasperated and could feel myself getting angrier. " I don't fucking moan their name during sex."

Neither of us spoke a word to eachother as she packed her things.

The air was thick I just watched as through things into her carry on as she scrambled running from the bathroom

"I have to go now, hes sending a car." She said barely above a whisper.

I nodded as I stood up against the doorway, hoping my frame would stop her.

"I love you Nick." She kissed me on the cheek and walked out the door. "I don't know what else you want from me."

With that she was gone I walked as the Limo picked her up. I couldn't help but wonder what she packed the lingerie for. Maybe, my mind was just playing tricks on me. Maybe it was nothing, maybe it was everything. One thing was sure, I was losing her, and to Rotten Dick.

End of flashback

So halfway from the bathroom to the table I grabbed a shot off the waiters tray, and then took another, and another.

I stopped when I realised what I was doing. Luckily no one was there to see my moment of weakness. It felt so good the buring sensation down my throat, ease the pain in my heart. Fuck listen to me I sound like one of our songs. A broken love song. The one song that sticks in my head is 'The Call' in particular.

I sat down in my seat quietly, just enough to give my brothers a nod letting them know I was okay. I stared at the bottle of wine on the table wanting so badly to take the bottle and go to the beach and just drown my sorrows while my feet were pressed firmly into the cold sand.

I heard a tiny voice snap me out of my thoughts "Penny for your thoughts?" The brunette in yoga pants and tight red t-shirt, in a side braid and flip flops asked me.

I knew we did introductions earlier but I didn't want to be rude "Need more pennys". I grabbed a drink of my water, wishing it was a gin and tonic on the rocks.

She smiled and rummeged in her purse " I got a 1.00 dollar bill." She handed it to me giggling I notice now in front of her one the table she has 3 empty shot glasses.

"Its okay you don't want to hear my problems." I flashed her my carter grin, was I flirting with her. I scolded myself on the inside. Married, stop that carter.

She rolled her eyes and slurred her speech some, It would be nice to forget mine for a night." She said as she flagged down another waiter. I only assumed it was for another shot.

She smiled she had the cutest dimple that popped up when ever she smiled her green eyes sparkling or were they glossy. 

The waiter came over and she asked for a water. " I know the answers aren't in here, if they were I would have found them a long time ago." She pointed to the empty shot glasses in front of her. She returned her attention back to the party.

Nicks POV

I couldn't believe this girl in my arms that smelled like strawberry and vanilla, has gone through this tonight, by one of our fans non the less. I don't really know much about her except she offered me a dollar; and her life has been turned upside down. I feel this protectiveness over her, I feel like I need to protect her she has already been so broken.

I just keep rubbing her head with my thumb 'saying everything is going to be okay'. She is soaking my shirt and I don't know her and I can barely understand what she is saying in between sobs in the background I here A.J Yelling You got to go, get her out of here.'

As minutes pass she looks up at me and bites her lip " I am sorry-" She stops mid-sentence I guess she dosen't know my name either. "Nick" I look at her as telling her it is okay. "Nick, I got your shirt all wet". She sniffs and moves her head off my shoulder. I loosen my grip on her.

I lean down and tilt her chin so she looks into my eyes. "Its going to be okay".
I watch as Kevin gets everyone out of the VIP section except for A.J, Rochelle, and myself.

Brian comes over and trys to make Sophia laugh and says " You could have taken her." and whispers something in her ear that make her eyes light up.

Sophia looks up and smiles " I highly doubt that" between sniffles she gets up and walks over to the couch where A.J and Rochelle are sitting. She is a little un-steady on her feet maybe from the alcohol or the break down she just had.

I still feel the sense of needing to help her, it is a very powerful feeling. Maybe its because Lauren seems so strong and it doesn't feel like she needs me. Maybe its because I am a softy at heart, or maybe this girl just seems so broken, I want to make it better nobody deserves to feel this way.

I walk with my arm around her shoulders as to steady her. Once we get to the white sectional couch she sits down and sinks into the material. She faces herself so she is infront of A.J and Rochelle and apologises. Who does that? why would she have anything to apologize about?

Sophia's POV

I was thankful Nick was there to catch me I felt incredibly embarassed crying on this mans shoulder. He doesn't know me and I don't know him but I am sure glad he was there I don't think I cried since the night I left my hometown. I apologized to A.J and Rochelle with shaky breaths, I was upset that I lost control of my emotions tonight, the one night I made friends, the one night. I half felt like beating my head off the closest wall. I was so angry at myself.

"So I uderstand if you want me to leave" Sophia shrugged her shoulders

"We are two fourths of the backstreet boys we are used to having girls fall and cry and soak our shirts." A.J tried to make light of the situation, he reached over and pushed my shoulders trying to get me to smile.

"Im joking Soph, really we all come from very dramatic backgrounds this one here had his own reality TV show" pointing to Nick.

Nick Chimed in " Yea its completely normal" smiled and flicked my hair.

Rochelle looked at me her short length black dress hung knee length, as the dress shimmered in the black light. " You have nothing to be sorry about do you hear me." I nodded in response. A.J came over and sat next to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulder exposing all of his tattoos. " You are supposed to be celebrating, not looking after me. I mean tonight is your special night." I stood up " I think I should go"

A.J stood with me " I understand if you want to leave Sophia, but if your leaving because you think I am embarassed of you or upset. I am not, I am worried about you." His voice raised an octive as to stress the point he wanted me there.

I looked down at what I was wearing " Shes right you know, I don't belong here."

Nick looked up at me this time " Why, don't you belong here. Because your not wearing a short dress, exposing yourself to the public?"

I looked down at myself and at Rochelle. "Well, Yeah...look at me I am such mess right now. I knew this was a bad idea, I knew I wasn't ready to go out. It is the first time I was out in public without Lucas."

Rochelle looked at me "You mentioned him before sweetie, I am sorry
I had no idea. I thought maybe you were just seperated."

I scoffed " Yea, Seperated." She put her head down " Im sorry, Rochelle look you are the closest thing I have to a friend here. I don't mean to be a bitch Im just not handling things so well."

She came over and hugged me "Its okay, I understand im married to an recovering addict. She pointed over to A.J who just went to get me a bottle of water and box of tissues.

"I know Rochelle but you don't need this in your life." I said pointing to myself moving my right hand in a circle in front of my face.

Rochelle shook her head " Why are you pushing us away, and you deserve to have some fun and be happy. Everyone does! So enough drama, lets go dance." Rochelle grabbed my hand and moved me out of the VIP room to the dance floor past and A.J and past Nick.

Rochelle looked at me "When one of my closest friends past away from breast cancer, I danced constantly it helped numb the pain. It felt great just for a bit to get lost in the music." Rochelle yelled over the music and to where Leighanne and Leigh were dancing. Its been so long since I danced, I wasn't sure If I could remember how.

I looked over at A.J and nick sitting by the bar, AJ dancing and mingling in his seat, why Nick kept looking at his phone. Even though the strobes of flashing green, yellow, and blue lights with the discoball flashing to the down beat of the song playing. I could see the pained look on Nick's face. He was sitting all alone drinking a drink on the rocks.

I excused myself from the ladies, and danced my way through the club, I grabbed Nick's hands " Stand up, if I have to dance then so do you. Apparently its really good therapy."

"Do I have to?" He whined " Im really not in the dancing mood." He was stubborn in his own right.

I smiled and got behind him and pushed his back, I couldn't help but notice how muscular his back was. I yelled over the music "I feel like I owe you, for being the perfect stranger tonight." I said once he gave up and we were standing on the crowded dance floor." I started to move my feet to the beat of the music, I have been away from the music scene for awhile, but I still thought I could shake it pretty good.

"Look I know you don't want to talk about it, I know that better than anyone. I already offered you a dollar, but you didn't want to take it so dance with me I grabbed his hands and moved them in a up and down motion to get him to move to the beat. I have seen their concert on TV once I knew he could move. I just didn't put it all together until I saw all five of them together tonight. I knew their songs just didn't know their names.

Nick reluctantly moved his feet to the music I could smell the alcohol on his breath as he shuffled closer to me. I wasn't entirely sure if this was the smartest idea, but the two shots i took back to back before making my decesion to dance with Nick it was really feeling good to dance, I thought it might help him as well.

Nicks POV

I was sitting at the table watching everyone dance, celebrate and have a good time. All I could think about was I was alone. How much I missed Lauren and how things between us have just been so not in sync with us, the way we used to be.

I look over and see Rochelle, Leigh, and Leighanne, and Sophia dancing to snoop dogs drop it like its hot the remix. She was no latina like leigh but she could move, she wasn't stiff. She could moved to the beat. I caught myself watching her. Her yoga pants not leaving much to the imagination.

For the 3rd time that night I silently reminded myself that I was married. A.J came over and pulled up a chair and sat on it backwards. "Shes quite the girl, isn't she." A.J interrupted my thoughts and pat me on the back of my head.

"What" I blushed "Yea shes not bad." I quickly wanted to change the subject "So" I pointed around the crowded club with proceeds going to A.Js anti-bullying cause. "What do you think of tonight?"

A.J Smiled and took a deep breath taking everything in "Its absolutely amazing minus the earlier, but it was bound to happen sometime." A.J shrugged his shoulders. "Thanks Man, for the party its great! You and Lauren must have been pretty busy."

I could feel A.J digging, this used to be Kevins role, but now its most certainly A.J him and Howie are tied for mother hen of the year. "Yea, Busy" I sighed looking at my phone taking another sip of my old long time Buddy Jack D.

"Look Man, It will get better every relationship has its ups and downs, we are all here for you when your ready to talk about it. You need to talk about it, you don't want another incident, like when your sister passed away. You need to talk about it. I love you like a little brother" A.J smiled and gave me a man hug you know the one with the slaps on the back."

I kind of glared at A.J I didn't like my sisters death being called an incident, but I shut down. It really was in a very dark place, that might be why I feel so protective over Sophia, because I don't want her feeling the way I felt. I went to a couple of meetings with A.J when Rochelle was busy with Ava and couldnt make it. It helped I started writing songs and Lauren really helped with it. I sighed again thinking of Lauren in Italy with Rodderick.

"Thanks Jay, Love you two man". I glanced at the crowd Sophia was no where to be seen I noticed Rochelle coming towards us."

"Ro, your really breaking it down out there" Nick gave her a high five.

"Yea, not to bad for a pregnant lady, huh?" Rochelle smiled the hugest smile as A.J picked her up and swung her around in a circle.

"Really"? Rochelled nodded quickly to the response, as A.J whiped the tear from his left eye. A.J pulled the chair up next to me and yelled at the top of his lungs "I am the happiest man alive, my baby is having another baby"

I was the first to stand up and and whistle, and hug Rochelle and congratulate her. "Wish Lauren was here it would be the perfect evening." I hugged Rochelle tighter, not wanting to let her go, she returned the squeeze.

He jumped off the chair and kissed Rochelles soon to be baby bump, as the crowd errupted with cat calls and whistles and old fasioned hand claps. A.J and Rochelle were getting pulled away by the madness of friends and family they really did have a lot to celebrate.

Nick: You will never guess the announcement A.J and Rochelle just made, I am going to be an Uncle again. message sent @ 11:58pm May 28, 2015

Nick: I guess you are busy, I hope you are having fun. Message sent @12:30am

Nick: I love you! Wish you were here :(   Message sent @ 1:00am

I look up and see the Red T-Shirt and tight yoga pants coming at me messy brown hair up in a messy bun with a smile on her face. She dragged me to the dance floor and all I could smell was alcohol sweat and strawberries and vanilla.

The scent was intocxicating, I moved myself so I was behind her grinding to the music, forgetting all about Lauren and the lonlieness. She wiggled away from me, and danced in front of me moving in rythm to T-pain's booty wurk song. I watched as by the end of song she expertly did the booty shake. I felt the buzzing in my pocket, I ignored it.

As we moved in time together to the beat I could feel myself wanting to push her body up against the closest wall, move my body up and down hers while she is pinned my hands in her hair, trailing kisses down her neck.

I was thankfull at that moment Kevin came in and moved me out of the way, things were getting pretty intense and hot on the dance floor. I knew it wasn't just the hot lights but wow, I haven't been in that erotic of a situation for awhile now.

A.J came over taking the drink out of my hand "I think you had enough." What are you doing Nick, Your married."

I reached for the drink and A.J dumped it on the floor. "look, we were just dancing." "Im doing anything wrong, she is the one that isn't here."

A.J gave me a knowing look "This and random girls aren't going to make your problems go away." As I grabbed a shot off one of the trays.

I heard my phone buzz again in my pocket, I couldn't ignore it anymore.

I looked at my phone, left it on the table next to A.J walked back over to Sophia gave her a shot, and asked her if she wanted to go somewheres and talk.

A.J shook his head "Nick, Nick, this is not the answer" A.J looked down at my phone "Nick, Nick your phone."

I couldn't here A.Js voice anymore I was standing in front of Sophia the spark and electricity was electric so to speak. I whispered in her ear "Do you want to get out of here and talk?"

I could hear her increased heart beat from dancing, almost beating perfectly with the beat of the music.

She looked at me and licked her lips and nodded with that I led her out by placing my hand on the small of her back. Neither of us saying a word.

End of Nick's POV

A.J looked down at Nicks phone it was password proctected, A.J knew nick well enough he tried a couple combinations and got it to un-lock. A.J couldn't believe what his eyes were seeing.

Lauren: Thats great Im really happy for them :)  Message sent @ 1:30am

Lauren: I have been doing a lot of thinking, I think we should take a break message sent at 1:45am

Lauren: Nick...I love you, but I don't know if Im in love with you anymore. message sent @ 2:00 am

Lauren: Nick we need to talk when I get home, please dont do anything you are going to regret. Message sent @ 2:03am

A.J's phone vibrated as did Kevin's, Howies, and Brians. It was TMZ twitter feed. As a picture of Nick Carter, and girl labelled Random were were seen leaving Club Cobra.

A.J howie exchanged looks "This is not going to be good."

Howie sipped his drink “ No it is not.”

Sophia's POV

We walked outside of the club and I couldn't believe the amount of cameras, signs, people. The amount of love and support for A.J and the guys I met tonight known as the Backstreet Boys.

I looked around at the sea of people, and took a deep breath. Letting the oxygen into my lungs. My head was spinning from all of the events of evening, the dancing, the closeness. The feel of a mans warm touch, the number of random shots I took tonight. Most of all the intoxicating smell of Nicks cologone makes my toes tingle.

Nick opens a door for me and we climb into a what I call A VIP Taxi, I had no idea these kind of things existed. It was a silver mercedes C230. It had a driver in a black suit, with air conditioned white leather seats. It had a glass divider that moved up and down with the press of a button. There was soft music playing in the background, there was a stocked mini fridge, a television, not to mention the windows were tinted.

I have only seen this kind of luxury in the movies, so to speak. I was so in awe with the the situation that I didn't even realise how close Nick was sitting next to me. I feel the silky black fabric rubbing against my legs. I could feel his breath, his cool breath on my neck I could feel my mouth getting dry.

his hot breath snapped me away from my thoughts. "So, do you always get in cabs with strangers?" Nick tilted my chin so I was looking with him.

All I could do was stare into his eyes they were so soulful, so dark, so blue, yet he had a familar loook in his eyes I knew that look well it was lonliness. I am sure my skin had a nice rosey glow, luckily the lighting was low enough that he couldn't see my nervousness.

"Actually, Nick this isn't a cab. Where I am from cabs don't smell like vanilla. They smell like Beer, b.o, and urine."

Nick Chuckeled " Yea, so where are you from and you didn't answer my question." Nick poured us both a tall bubbly glass of champange. I could feel the bubbles on my lips. I swallowed the drink as Nick looked at me with wondering eyes.

"I am from away, from here." I stumbled my words "let me try that again, I am not from around here." I took another drink of my champange and drank half the glass.

"O-oookay, let me start. I am Nick Carter I grew up in Tampa and my wife is cheating on me" Nick poured himself another bottle of the bubbly.

I stared at him feeling like I should say something equally as personal "Well I am from away. My husband and baby were killed in a car accident and I think it was my fault".

Some time passed neither of us really saying words to each other, really want can two complete strangers say to each other. Can you really offer friendly advice if your not friends.

Nick slurred his words "Your, so pretty Sophia." Nick leaned his head on my shoulder and twirled index finger around my long wavy hair "Want to come home with me and sleep with me in my bed."

I pondered the pros and cons in my drunken state " I think that would be a bad idea Nick, Considering hoooowww much we had to drink", Where are we going anyways? and your married!"

I looked out the window, but I couldn't see much because of the tinted windows. Nick brought his head off of my shoulder "The Beacch" He slurred his words.

I wondered how much Nick had to drink he seemed far drunker than me and I was toast. "Nick, how about I take that drink from you." I grabbed the drink from him, and he pouted.

"I think we have had enough to drink". I could feel my head spinning.

"I think maybe you are right." Nick rubbed his eyes "how about we drink some water."

The car came to hault and our door opened "Mr. Carter were here, would you like me to wait?"

Nick handed him what looked like three crisp one-hundred dollar bills. "No its fine we will find our way back."

I looked at nick like he lost his mind, Nick helped me out of the car and he bent down and took his shoes and socks off. not very well mind you, he fell once or twice and blamed it on the sand being un-even.

I just rolled my eyes and wrapped my arm around his waist as to steady him, i am sure i didn't help very much as I kept stumbling too. The third time we fell down I gave up, and just layed in the cool sand my feet burried in the cool sand. Glaring at Mr. Romeo, who just seems to not have care in the world that we are miles away from home with no wheels.

Nick opened his eyes im assuming his head was spinning "Why do you keep glaring at me, and giving me attitude, I know I am drunk sue me, just hasn't been the best night."

"Really Nick, Really? Your asking me why I am mad at you. I climbed into a cab with you and now we are on a beach stranded with no way to get home." I said yelling at him in barely above a whisper. "You may cut me up into tiny little peices and I will never see my dog again."

Nick laughed " Really, you think-" He cut himself off. "You have thought this since we have been here, and you really think this about me, this is quite entertaining."  Nick laughed harder, and harder until tears were in his eyes.

"Wow- and Howie says I watch to many movies, except in my movies aliens come and abduct me and teach me there language." Nick pretends to be an Alien.

I glare at him "Fuck Off, It could happen" I try not to smile I push him harder so he falls back into the sand. I help him up cause he looks like a cockroach stuck on his back that can't get up. "Okay, So maybe your not a rapist or a murderer, but how in the hell are we going to get home?" I still bitch at him in barely above a whisper

When he stood up he put a peice of hair behind my ear "You should smile more often"

Nick Chuckled " Seriously, I am not making fun of you. But your just telling me this is how you feel now? and why are you whispering"? Nick stood up stretching out his hand for me to take it.

"Yea-"I shrugged my shoulders, I was reading the situation." I Whispered " I am whispering because that sign says private property, and their are dogs barking."

Nick rubbed his hands through his hair "This my property sophia and those dogs you hear barking are mine. This is my place in LA."

Nicks POV

I was drunk, drunk, drunk...but so was she, she, she...

I will never forget the look on her face it was priceless....you know those mastercard commercials, well that was one of them, she could definately be a "priceless" star.

I opened the door and we entered my home and she playfully smacked me again. "Ouch, what in the hell was the for."

"Your bringing me to your place and you are married do you not see the ring on your finger?" she looked at me and moved her hands as to say what the fuck.

I wanted to bang my head against the door frame as leant down on the staircase and kicked my shoes off onto the black ceramic tile- Ah Lauren, how could I forget my lovely lets-take-a-break-wife.

I closed the door behind me and looked at Sophia right in the eyes "I just didn't want to be alone again tonight."

Sophia reached around me and locked the door bit her lip and grabbed my hands.

"I don't want to be alone anymore either-"

Nicks POV

So this seems like one of those situations where you have an angel sitting on one shoulder and the devil sitting on the other shoulder. Then you have me, I am the one who ultimately needs to make the decesion. The thoughts racing through my mind feels like a like a hamster stuck in ball....rolling, and rolling around losing oxygen.

Here is this girl in front of me un-belivably cute and someone who could help me forget my problems. She reaches behind me and locks mine and Lauren's summer home, she is gorgeous and broken, her life has been shattered like a mirror.

You know how you have those crucial moments in life that are life changing, these are those moments. Like if there was a sign in front of me that directs me right to stay together or, left to work it out. One way or the other the path is going to be a bumpy ride.

Sophias POV

He looks in shock and I just stand here like a dumb ass waiting for him to invite me in. It is getting awkawardly un-comfortable and the room is still slightly spinning. I quickly try to remember my ballet classes as a child and the art of spotting. It helps, whoever would of thought that ballet would be good for nights such as these. I bite my lip as I lean in I just wanted to forget the feel of his arms wrapped around me, if only for one night....I deserve to feel loved right?

Nicks POV

I look into her eyes as I lean closer I feel my heartbeat quicken and I grab her waist, and pull her close to me. My senses are taken over as I look into her green eyes by the scent of strawberry and vanilla.

I take the plunge and lean down and taste her vanilla flavoured lips. I now know where the vanilla scent has been coming from all night. Her neck smelled of strawberries as I started tracing kisses down her neck and thats when I open my eyes we somehow have made it to the livingroom and I see mine and Laurens wedding picture.

Just as I see the picture I pull away, feeling like I have had the wind knocked out of me. I feel wetness on my cheeks I look up and see tears falling from Sophia's eyes leaving her cheeks tear stained.

"Nick I -Sophia I- cant do this" we both said at the same time cutting each other off. I swallowed in relief and took the breath I didn't realise I was holding in. U-Turn taken road adverted, but why did I feel like this was the wrong road.

Sophias POV

I let go of nicks hands I didn't realise I was playing with his wedding ring we look at each other not really knowing what to say. He looked at me sheepishly, I notice the look of regret on his face. It was the same look I came home to on the night my life changed forever.

"Want a drink?" He asked as he grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge. I didn't realise but we were somehow in his kitchen. I nodded in response and he chucked me the bottle water.

"I think we have had enough alcohol for one night." He said in between gulps of the water. I looked around at the kitchen "You have a really nice home" I say between my smaller sips of water.

Nick looks around "Thank you...so-"

I get up from the stool I was sitting on and shake my head "This is so awkward-Maybe I should go."

Nick moves closer... There was that smell again I breathed it in, it was like a breath of fresh air, Oh how I loved his colonge I must buy this for Lucas...I stop myself and laugh out loud- 'Right my hubands dead'- does that mean hes still my husband?

Nick glances at me "Awkward yes- but don't go, do you like Nachos?" He asks looking at me with cheesy grin.

I nodd in response "Food sounds needed, what can I do to help?"

he chuckles "Just so you know Sophia the old me would have you tied up by now licking whip cream off various places on your body. Its not that I am not attracted to you believe me I am, but I think im married- for the moment." He bites his tounge as he passes me the cheese grater and the cheese.

"I like extra cheese, and I don't like being tied up. I do however, like to take control." I wink at him, I shake my head at myself 'Sophia what are you doing, we have been over this. Its not happening!'

Nick continued to chop up the onions and tomatoes on the cutting board that was placed firmly against the dark granite counter top. "Noted, Lauren doesn't let me have extra cheese." He looks at me intently.

I chuckeled and looked up at him "Eat your heart out, shes not here and what happens at Casa a la Carter tonight stays at Casa a la Carter is our secret I wont tell."

Nicks POV

I have never been so turned on by someone rubbing cheese down a cheese grater, but I was I think I may have a cheese fetish, is that wrong?

I wanted to take her and throw her on the counter top right here and now, I restrained myself though. It would be fun but we can all have our fantasys right. I am taken away from my thoughts as she hands me cheese.

I wonder if she is giving me an in, I have to take my mind away from being tied up my god I am a married man, even if my beautiful wife is off fucking someone elses brains out. To sleep with Sophia would be almost as bad as sleeping with fan. It would be wrong on so many levels.

"So, I have to ask" as I place the nachos on the plate and watch as she layers it with cheese. She nodds her head questiongly.

"What did you think was going to happen tonight?" I turn around and place the nachos in the oven and set the timer. Ovens and drunk me's dont work.

"Honestly, I had no idea. I don't really know what I wanted to happen. Its been so lonnnnnggggg since....ya know-And I haven't been kissed the way you kissed me and the way you look at me- it lights a fire in me that his burned out."

I gulp- I was not expecting that kind of response the sexual tension in the room was thick. I couldn't help but look at her like she was peice of meat, it was a primal instinct.

"Yet I feel like Im playing with fire its not right- your married, and Im A widow" she stumbled find the right words.

I push out the black leather bar stool and sit next to her, my legs were getting tired of standing. "Im sorry Sophia you probably think im a pig-."

she moved her stool so she was facing me "No, maybe a guinea pig" she looked so serious.

I shook my head " A guinea pig?" I ask incrediously. She nodds between laughter that she was trying to hold in.

"In all seriousness, I think there are two sides to every story. You seem like someone who is lonely." She smiled and jumped of her seat when the oven timer went off.

"Ahh, speaking of piggys I am ready to eat." She says as she snorts like a pig and  smells the air. Obviously still making fun of me.

"mmmm...where have you been all my life"I watch as she takes a bite out of the nacho, clearly forgetting they just came out of the oven and quickly reaches for the water.

After we were done eating we made our way to the living room where we talked for a bit more and i noticed her yawn, and I looked outside and saw that the sun was starting to come up.

"I always wanted to see a sunrise from the ocean its beautiful" she got up out of the chair and walked towards the window.

"Its breathtaking isn't it."

"Yea it is". Except I was looking at her not the sunset. After learning some more about her, I am very intrigued. We didn't get into the serious stuff but the favorite movies, video games, Songs...That sort of thing. It turns out she doesn't like video games she said they pratically ruined her marriage jokingly.

Sophias POV

"Lets go outside, I want to feel the water hit my toes" I don't know where this burst of energy came from, but I really wanted to go and feel the sand beneath my toes. I didn't want this night or day to end.

Nick stood up and called for his dogs that I haven't learned the names of yet. They were so tired, they didn't move. Nick tried again to call them and still no movement.

"After you" he led me out with his hand on the small of my back he grabbed a  red and black checkered blanket by the step and we walked out. It took awhile for my eyes to adjust to the bright sunlight. The way it reflected off of the ocean it was blinding.

Nick placed the blanket down and laid on his back with his hands linked together behind his head. I followed suit it felt nice to lay down. Nick yawned "So, Nick you asked me to leave the club with you, why?"

I looked up at the sky by the looks of placement of the sun in the sky it would be almost 7:30a.m. My gramps would be so proud of me. It was simple moments like this that I miss my friends and family.

"You were fun and an escape" He turned so he was looking at me

"Escape from what?" I asked as a peice of hair fell infront of my face and he moved it and put it behind my ear.

"Reality-Lauren wants to take a break." Nick sighed again, I secretly hoped he didn't see the colour of my cheeks. His touch electrifies me, I really hope he doesn't see the affect he has on me.

"Im sorry Nick, but do you know why?" He moves and lays on his back again.

"We have been fighting a lot lately, and things just aren't like they used to be with us."

"Its all work no play" I nodd as to encourage him to continue. "We tried having a baby and it turns out she can't have children, and it has put a lot of stress on our realtionship." Nick tugged at his hair in fusturation.

"So we have sex and all.... I love her to death but- the spark has been gone, we can't talk about it. Its like the un-spoken rule, I told her there are other options and she didn't want that." He continused as I watch as I watch his blue eyes fill with water, looking like little pools of misery.

"I found the perfect surrogate, so it would be our child, and she said if she wasn't meant to have children then she wasn't meant to be a mom. He said his voice raising. Ever since then we grew apart, work got really busy and with my touring schedule and her Kitt Fitt schedule our realtionship has been strained."

I listen intently I have become a great listener when you don't talk all the time and intterupt people the world seems different. "Im sorry Nick realtionships are hard sometimes. My mom always said you have to work at them everyday its like a job."

Nick bit his tounge I could tell he wanted to say something but he didn't " Nick, you know no one knows this you are going to be the first person I tell"

Nick leaned in concerned "My husband Lucas the night he died was also the same night he told me cheated on me and it meant nothing, I swallowed my tears with so succh luck, i felt nick brush them away with this thumb he urged me to continue as I stopped "Go ahead Soph" He wrapped his arms around me

"The last words I said to him were I wish I never see you again". I broke down

"I didn't mean it Nick every day I think its my fault, if I didn't say those words, if he would of held on if he knew I still loved him. I shook my head "would he still be alive, if I just stayed home out of the rain and fought for him. If I didn't give up on us at that moment, if he didn't run out into the rain in the car and jump into the passenger seat.

"Would we be having this conversation? Would I have met you? Would our un born child be alive sleeping right now?" I stuttered on my words.

"So Nick maybe she didn't mean those words either, if i could take them back i would. I can't and I have to live with myself for the rest of my life."

I cried un-controllably "Its all my fault Nick". Nick grabbed me and held onto me tighter, I never wanted him to let go, I didn't want to let go. I would have fought for us." Don't make the same mistake I did"

Nicks POV

I didn't even remember what time I finally fell asleep I didn't even make it to the bedroom I literally just crashed on the couch and stripped down to my Buc boxers and through the blanket over me.

I keep hearing baning and yelling in my dream "Nick, get your ass out here and open up this door come on."

I heard the yelling again "Come on man I got to pee and you made me sware infront of Ava. Damn it Nick Carter open up this Door we need to talk"

I opened my eyes and it took awhile to for me to remember where I was, then it hit me like a flash of memories....The pounding of drums hitting my temples, The text message, leaving the club with Sophia, Nachos, the kiss....I hit my head as I got up and stumbled to the door.

I knew that Voice well "Hi A.J" I swung open the door and continued to rub the sleep out of my eyes. I looked at him through blurred vision, I saw that he had Ava strapped to his chest in bright pink front baby holder thing...looks like a backpack for babies. In my opion she is to old for it now, but thats A.J for ya.

A.J Walks in and struts his stuff and looks at me with accusing eyes he looks around and walks in and takes out his cell phone and hands me mine. 

"Nick, shut the door." I really wasn't in the mood for this I had to think and figure out what the hell had happened and figure out what was real and what wasn't.

"A.J Look-" He cuts me off "Save it Nick, Rochelle and I have been worried sick about you you two and you open the door in your boxers like you have been fine this whole time"

"I am Fine" I glare at him out of the corner of my eye, and say barely above the whisper. I grab a bottle of water out of the frigde and down it in one gulp. I glance at the clock and see that it is 8:00p.m

A.J looks at me as if demanding an answer I sware he had this intimidating dad thing down "What?" I say and shrug my shoulders.

"Where is she?" he asks in the same kind of demanding tone

"Where is who? My wife? She is with Roderick." I look around "There is no one else here."

I then heard footsteps coming behind me" No dumb Ass, hes talking about the girl you left with." he hit me on the back of my head.

I sighed I knew that voice very well as well, It was Kevin "Your married Nick" I turned around and saw the rest of them. I could tell this was going to to turn into a Backstreet intervention as I saw Brian and Howie walk in as well.

"What the Hell" I look at A,J and glare and the rest of them and shae my head.

"So where is She" Kevin asks following me to the living room as the entourage follows behind him.

"Look guys I am not in the mood can't we talk about this later?" I ask as I sit down and rub my temples.

Kevin being the smart ass he is raises his voice "Im sorry Nick is that Better".

I glare at him " Why did we ask you to come back again?"

"Because I am sexy and you know it." He replied. "We all know Im the sexy one". I chuckle

"Nick, we are just worried about you. We saw the text from Lauren. We know how you can get" Howie stated with concerned eyes he came over and gave me a hug and then hit me on the back of the head.

"Ouch, what the hell Howie" I rub the back of my head where he just hit me.

"You are Married Nick." Howie replies back to me

"Look nothing happened we talked thats it-"

"Thats why you have pink lip gloss on your lips now, and there are these pictures of you two all over the internet." Brian shows me the picture on his phone and sure enough there was me and Sophia on the beach cuddled up together on the beach blanket

"What the hell?" I say as I look at it, "Who fucking took that?" I grab the phone 

"Look guys its not what it Looks like" I look at them pleading for them to understand

"Really, Nick?" Kevin asks me.

"Cause it looks like your all cuddled up with someone with no shirt on with your pants un buckled, with a girl thats not your wife."

We were all sitting down at this point..how was I going to explain this because I don't even understand it myself.

A.J looked at me and took his shades off and put Ava down so she could play with the toys he brought her...Obviosuly get her away from the adult conversation."

Not before Ava could get her say in "Uncle Nicky your in Trouble".  I couldn't help but smile at her, she was the reason I wanted to have a kid in the first place. I really wanted a little girl to spoil rotten.

I flashback remembering the in-depth conversations that I had with Sophia about kids and marriage and the little girl she lost but had to give birth to and how much it really messed her up.

"Yes, Uncle Nicky is in biiiiggg trouble Ava why don't you go play over there" I responded. "Really, A.J" The rest of the guys chuckled.

"Look Nick, its not like we all haven't been put in a situation like this. You are not supposed to be drinking either." Like I said before new mother hen, or should I say Father hen.

"Were just worried about you, Bro." Brian smiled " You can tell us anything you know that right?"

I returned the smile "I know I can- There just isn't anything to say nothing happend, like we didn't have sex you know?"

All the guys half smiled and looked at me with wide eyes "Well thats good Nicky, but cheating is still cheating." howie shrugged his shoulders and A.J came out of the Kitchen giving Ava some Animal crackers and Apple Juice and handed me a tyenol and some juice as well.

I rubbed my hand through my hair and felt sweat and sand " Look, shes not here I took her home and nothing happened out on the beach we were just talking. It was just a really intense kiss that easily could have lead to more..."

I stopped the guys were glued to me like I was there favorite soap opera I sware they live through my escapade stories that have been lacking since I have been with Lauren.

So I continued "We were both hurting and we were drinking and she just made me smile and forget. Sophia was really good to talk too, we both wanted to escape. We both stopped before it got further." I sighed

"I messed up guys." I rubbed my face "The picture its all out there" I ask refering to the media and social media outlets.

A.J sighed "Well I can't say with how you guys have been doing lately, its not that surprising."

I nod my head knowingly "look im sorry I hit you on the head man, but seriously Sophia seems really sweet dude Kristin says she is a really sweet girl"

"Look its not like that, I didn't use her as a one night stand kiss-thing, you know-" I say defensively "

Brian looked at me "Then what was it Nick?"

I took a deep breath " I don't Know Lauren and I haven't been getting a long all that well we barely have sex and when we do the love is gone, she doesn't look at me the same anymore. She is always gone, as am I but she is the one that said she wanted a break"

"We know man, we kind of broke into your phone" A.J shurgged his shoulders"Sorry man I know its your phone and privacy and stuff but we were worried you were going to do something you might regret."

"She was just the perfect stranger- I can't explain it we talked and we talked about everything. It okay about the phone I would have done the same."

I finished off the drink of Apple Juice and continued "I sware the pants must have became un-buckled from our kiss but it only happened one time."

Howie interjected "Nick, but a kiss is never just a kiss."

"Look guys I know you mean well and thanks for looking out but everything is going to work out you will see, now go home to your wives."

Kevin smiled " Nah, were staying here to night little bro, even Ava."

"Brothas gotta stick togetha, yo" Brian says with his best Gangsta look

As much as these guys annoyed me sometimes, they are my Brothers and I was really happy they were here because I didn't know what I was going to do...

Sophia's POV

I walked into the room and was overwhelmed by the amount of love and support given to me. Pleading me to stay and stay in this group according to the leader of the group I have come so far...I have came out of shell every meeting I say a little more about myself and what bothers me.

If you haven't noticed yet...I am a runner I take off when things get rough, I quit if I feel I am not good enough to be on a team and bring people down. I am what you would call a people pleaser I would rather please other people than myself.

So as I sit here and listen to the biggest strengths and weaknesses, and try to avoid Nick's gaze from the corner of the room, I sit next to Mary Beth and pretend like I don't notice the blonde that made me feel alive. He made me feel like a person again. I was kind of numb to it all and he made it painfully real that my husband was gone and never coming back, he also made my heart hurt again I have been so numb; zombie like even. He made me feel like living again, I smiled more that night than I have in the last three months. I also punched my punching bag harder these past weeks than I have in a long time.

So as Bryant the leader of the group the 'real psychiatrist' moves the group along and it is my turn to talk. I wonder to myself if anyone really wants to know what I have to say.

"Sophia, so what do you believe to be your biggest faults and follow that up by your strengths."

Bryant smiled and encouraged me to stand up and go to the podium. I look at A.J and his eyes are softening they always soften my mood, they are hypnotizing and calming.

I glance over at Nick, I don't know why but the slight nod of his head silently encouraging me. I felt stronger. Stronger than I have in awhile. I move my lips and before I know it sentences are spitting out and strength I had no idea was inside of me.

"Hi my name is Sophia and I really appreciate hearing all of your stories and it’s nice to know, I am not the only messed up person in the world." I don't exactly know why but the room broke into laughter. I wasn't joking I was being completely serious.

I was never a very good public speaker the bright lights shown down on me and I could feel the sweat beading on my forehead and the back of my neck, as I spoke into the 60’s looking microphone you could here the backfeed echoing…I felt my throat getting really dry I needed water.

I swallowed back the fear and looked at the supporting eyes in the audience and knew this is what I had to do to move on…baby steps.

"So you want to know my two biggest weaknesses, I feel I have more weaknesses than strengths. But the biggest weakness I have is I am to trustworthy it has always gotten me into trouble...especially in love. I find I ware my heart on my sleeve and fall much to quickly.”

I couldn’t help but look in Nick’s direction “Because of this I feel I am more closed off, because I fall easy so I break easy. So once I trust you, I trust you. Once you do something that loses that trust…its gone and it is hard to get back. Also, I am a runner I run when things get hard and I avoid confrontation at all costs. It is like a defence mechanism for me…That’s all.

“Thank you Sophia.” Bryant starts clapping his hands as does the rest of the room.

 “Everyone we really made some progress tonight…I will see you all next week. Sophia, I wish you the best of all life has to offer and know you are always welcome here.”

He leaves the room like a professor leaving his students, it kind of felt like I was graduating. I almost feel like I should whip out a year book and get all my friends to sign it. I try to sneak out of the room and here a familiar voice.

“Not running away are we” A.J walks over and offers me a hug “You did good tonight, Kid.”

“Thank you AJ It means a lot…”

“So, you know Sophia Nick didn’t come here to just support me you know.” AJ winks at me and walks off to grab some refreshments. I look over in the corner and see Nick leaning against the wall.

“I was about to walk away…I didn’t want this to be one of those moments I always wonder what if. I am still really not sure If I have a reason to be as angry as I am at him or not. Maybe I am just angry in general.

I feel like my feet are made of stone and I feel like I am dragging boulders across the floor I tap Nick on the Shoulder and he turns around I take a deep breath "A penny for your thoughts?"

Nicks POV

As I turn around to the light tap on my shoulder I see Sophia and says to me the same sentence when we were first met. We met almost a month ago, but I still remember her exactly as I had the night of our kiss. She is still the shy, nervous girl that bit her lip in front of me.

"Need more pennies" I shrug my shoulders.

"She hands me a 10.00 dollar bill and says this should be enough to pay you for an hour of thoughts right?" and grins.

I grin and give her a sideways glance and hand her the ten dollar bill back. "Its nice to see you again, you did really good tonight.

She takes the money back and puts it back in her jean shorts pocket. I couldn't help but look at her legs and then they wandered up further and I noticed freckles on her nose that weren't there before.

"Thank you" she plays with the lime green beaded braclet that was on her wrist.

"So how do you feel? I remember A.J telling me that he felt a lot better after a meeting more relaxed and at peace with himself."

she stopped playing with the bracelet and looked up at me I watched her chest move in and out as she took a breath searching for the right words.

"I don't know if at peace is a way that I would describe it, but it feels good to stop pretending. I don't pretend when I am at the meetings. I find I can be more myself. I still feel lost, but this place makes me feel more like I am found again you know."

"I know what you mean, sometimes its hard pretending to be something that your not. I know that all to well."

"I know" She blushes " I have been researching you on you tube mostly. I needed to know more about you. I can't believe you dated Paris Hilton." She laughed.

"Not you too" I shake my head "It was a bad point in my life and I learned from my mistakes."

She grinned " I know you did, I can tell from your interviews. You grew up a lot."

We both didn't really say anything for what seemed like an eternity, in reality it was probably only a minute.

"Im sorry Sophia for everything you know." I pushed out a gray plastic chair and sat next to her.

She sighed "I know you are Nick, Im sorry I have been so cold to you. I know you came to my appartment complex I got your message, Im sorry I didn't call you back." She takes a drink of the punch that has been swirling around a white paper cup.

"Well were both sorry so lets move on. I know this place that has the best hot chocolate."

"Sophia, your changing the subject. We should really talk about this."

She looks around the room and sees a bunch of people standing around, talking chatting amongst themselves. "Not here, okay"

I nodd and scan the room for A.J and notice he isn't anywhere to be seen, why do I feel like he planned this.

"Okay Soph, lets go lead the way my lady" I follow close behind her as she puts on a hat and sunglasses and grabs her sweater from a hook.

"Okay, so where is your car"? I smile down at her.

"Ohh I don't drive, not since the accident, I can't bring myself to"

I protectively put my arm around her and take of her hat and sunglasses "You don't need the disguise Sophia. I am not ashamed to be walking with you."

She grins up at me "How did you know?"

"I feel like I know you pretty well in someways. I also know that your blaming yourself for something that you can't control. You know its not your fault right? You know that you didn't kill your husband and that it was just a really bad accident and life circumstance."

She mumbled something all I caught was "No-I don't know that."

I pulled her closer and neither of us said anything, I noticed some well known paparazzi following us around, I didn't want to upset Sophia further so we just walked in silence.

we walked until we came to a small hole in the wall place called 'Grandmas Kitchen'. When we walked in I was immediately taken back by the vibe of the place. It was a very warm atmosphere that smelled of warmed baked chocolate chip cookies and coffee.

When we walked in there was a bell on the door that chimed when we walked in. The place was packed though it was small there were about ten tables and they were all taken except for one in the back. There was a small round table with carvings of past, present and future lovers with their names in the table. This place was great and the hot drinks were even better.

We were sitting there I was drinking my coffee and watched Sophia blow on her drink waiting for it cool down.

"So why Hot Chocolate?" I push I wanted to know more about her, I wanted to know everything about her. Me putting my arm around her in public wasn't something I would normally do. I wanted the world to know I really cared about this girl. I really wasn't sure where my realtionship stood with Lauren, Or Sophia for that matter...I know I wasn't going to let Sophia slip away, thats all I know. She is the only one that can make me smile lately. I am not sure knows the effect she has on me.

She grins up with me and has whip cream on her nose, and the candle in the center of the table flickers with my movement to whipe it off her nose "Thanks" she blushes.

"This Hot Chocolate is amazing, and I don't drink coffee and don't care for tea unless it is iced and has lots of sugar. I have a huge sweet tooth." She grins "Do you want to try some?"

She passes the mug to me and I take a sip and make a mental note to have this next time. The hot chocolate mixed with real whipped cream, and chocolate shavings and drizzled with carmel was heaven.

I pass it back to her "Your right this is delcious. I will have to bring Lauren here to try this sometime."

I instantly regret the words that come out of my mouth as I see Sophia's frame become distant and rigid.

"Im sorry Sophia its kind of a habit."

She looked at me and half smiled "You don't have any reason to be sorry Nick she is your wife."

"She doesn't act like one" I take a drink of my coffee and try to hide the hurt."

"I know Nick- But she is still your wife, I have been avoiding this topic all night."

"I know you have...We need to talk about it, and we need to talk about us." I grab her hands.

"I care about you, I feel something between us. You make me smile and you make me forget about her."

She pulls her hands away from mine "Nick your married."

"I know and so are you." I grab her hands again "Look at me Sophia"

Sophia looks at me " I-Care-About-You" She looks away "Keep looking at me Sophia don't run away this time.

She looks into my eyes and I squeeze her hand tighter "I feel a connection with you Sophia. I don't want to lose you. I need you to know I really care about you, and haven't stopped thinking about you, and the night we spent together talking. I tried to make it work with Luaren I can't forgive her for cheating on me. we went to counselling this past week. I can't stop thinking about you. I tried to go on like you never existed. I can't stop thinking about you.

"Nick, its getting late we should go and you should go home to your wife."

"Sophia, I know your scared and I know you feel it too." I grab her hand as she stands up to leave.

she gives in to my hand and links her fingers with mine "Nick, I care about you to but I think we should just be friends- its just enfactuation."

"Sophia stop running away- maybe it is, maybe it isn't. I would like to have the oppurtunity to find out- would you sit down and talk to me please."

She sighs and takes a deep breath "Why me?" She asks as she sits down.

"I don't know, I feel a very strong connection with you. I don't know maybe we are soulmates, or have been together in another life time. I am not sure but I haven't felt like I needed someone in my life like this in a long time. Do you feel it too?"

She bit her lip and grabbed my hand "I do, I feel some strong feelings for barely knowing you, but this crazy Nick. Your married."

"So are you Sophia, and I am married but we are seperated. We agreed this wasn't working. She admitted she loved Rodderick."

Sophia shook her head "Nick, no. I can't be your rebound."

"Its not like that Sophia" I rub circles on her hand.

"Nick we barely know each other, your acting crazy."

Nick smiled "Not crazy Sophia, Im passionate. I know I couldn't just be your friend. I can still feel the heat from your kiss three weeks ago. Im not saying I love you, but I can't lose you. I really care about you, and there is this un-deniable spark between us. I feel like I can be myself with you, and tell you anything."

"Nick, are you drugs?" I feel his forehead

"Funny- no I just like I said I can't explain something I don't fully understand but. I think we should be in eachothers lives as more than friends."

Do you remember my hands moving up and down your back, the kisses I trailed along your neck. I can't stop thinking about it, and you.

"So friends with benefits then?" Sophia asks "See where this takes us."

"Friends with benefits and you can't see anyone else and neither can I."

She chuckles "Nick, thats a realtionship,  this is absurd and surreal."

I grin up at her "I know I am coming on strong. I know I just can't be your friend. I want so much more than that from you intellectually and sexually. I couldn't handle seeing you with another man, thinking of another man holding you. I have trust issues." I chuckle "This seems really crazy to me too, but it seems even crazier to not try."

She leans in closer and whispers "Okay, Nick but I give this realtionship 30 days and If I want out, im out. This is nuts."

"Okay- I will make this 30 days you won't regret. I promise you wont want to run away."

I smile at her. Stand up and whisper in her ear "lets go"

"Okay where are we going?" I bite my lip

"Its a suprise." Nick smiles and hails a cab. "Sophia, I promise you wont regret this. Thank you for letting me in."

"Don't make me regret this Nick."

"So should we kiss or something to make this offical?" she asks me.

"I thought you would never ask." I say and give her everything I have in the kiss. We both break away breathless.

"Nick-I want to take this slow okay?" she bites her lip

I lean in and kiss her slower "better" I ask she playfully hits me on the arm "Not what I meant."

I smile "We can take things as fast or as slow as you want as long as I can make these 30 days the best days of our lives. I am going to show you how to love again.

"Deal- Nick if you want to go back to Lauren please let me know."

I pushed a stray of hair off her forehead as she rests her head on my shoulder

"I put enough of my energy into someone, who didn't return it back."

"Lauren and I are done. I admit falling for you as fast as I did its not in my character but I know you think its just in the past 3 weeks we had problems, but it has been in the making all year.

"Nick-just let me know okay, if in thirty days you want to go back. Its fine."

"Okay, I wont want too. But okay." I lean down and kiss her.

"So Thirty days we can make us offical, if we both want too?" I ask her and she nodds.

She looks out the window "Why are we at my apartment?"

"Your going to invite me in I need to see where my girl lives, and sleeps..." I wink at her.

"Slower Nick remember" She says as we step out of the cab.

I hug her from behind, she smelled so good and it felt great to have my arms around someone who appreciated me."I know, can't blame a guy for trying."

We walk up the stairs to my apartment and Nick takes off his flip flops and flops on the bed next to my dog Goldie and cuddles next to him "I want to know everything about you like starting with this dog, whats the story behind Goldie" I ask looking at her name tag.

"Its a long story Nick."

"I have thirty days." He grabs my hand and leads me to the couch. "You need to talk about your past, you have one as do I we need to embrace it."

I smile up at him "Wouldn't you rather make out?"

"Sophia, stop talk to me."

"I don't want to talk Nick. What if you sing to me?"

I wrap my arms around her and sing 'Ill Never Break Your Heart'. It seemed fitting. I felt her body un-tense around me. I could feel her inhale and exhale of breath. she fell asleep. I knew in my heart this was crazy not even divorced and on to another realtionship but this feels right. It feels like maybe this is where I am supposed to be right now. It doesn't feel wrong, it feels right. After talking to the other guys and A.J about this previously. They told me to go for it.

So I went for it...I know its fast but I couldn't live with the always wondering what if. If she isn't the person I know and feel she is well I have 30 days to see that. Instead of waiting seven years for someones true colors to come out.

I just hoped she didn't break my heart like all the others.

Sophia's POV- July 21, 2013 (Day One)

I woke up this morning and things in my world felt complicated, but at the same time I felt comfort. I am complicated. Everything with me is never easy. I put my mom through 48 hours of labour and my dad through six pack's of ciggarettes. I am sure with my teen years I also gave my dad the head of white hair; he now carries with him everyday.

I am sure, he is still worrying about me. I get up out of bed and head to my purse and look at the picture of me and Ralph McCabe a local small store owner in the town of Duncan BC. Also, Known as my dad. I miss him a lot, I find myself wanting to contact them and let them know I am okay. I am still not ready to face all that I left behind, the memories and the heartache. I am not sure if I ever will be.

I sigh as I put the picture back in my wallet not before kissing the picture first. I walked to fridge and looked and scrunched up my nose at the lack of food, and some moldy green left over pizza that I found as I searched for the apple that rolled back there the other day. I open my cubboards and see that they are equally as empty. I grab the box of strawberry poptarts and put one in. As I wait for the poptart to toast, I sit down with my orange juice and replay yesterday's events over, and over again in my head.

I didn't remember what time nick left last night, but I do remember him carrying me to bed and kissing me on the forehead and covering me up. I was so tired, and I remember the beating heart of nicks chest put me right to sleep. He had that kind of affect on me already he soothes my soul. Maybe, its because I don't have to pretend around him, or maybe he is right; just maybe we are star crossed lovers. I look down at my feet and realise I haven't given Goldie her breakfast yet. No wonder she is sulking this morning.

Goldie is and always will be Lucas' dog. She used to sit at the door and wait patiently for him to come home. For a week straight she didn't move away from the door after he died. Goldie barely ate anything for a week except for the food I force fed her with a sryinge. She is coming along slowly, just as I am. We are both getting by and slowly moving on.

This is why I wasn't suprised when Goldie didn't run to the door and attack Nick like most dogs would, but most dogs aren't nursing a broken heart.

"Thats such a good girl, sit." I watch as Goldie sits on command "Now, say please mom isn't giving you your breakfast unless you use your manners." I say in a baby voice. Goldie quietly speaks and I give her homemade dog food. Lucas' didn't trust the grocery store bagged dog food. I have to respect his wishes.

I open my door and grab the local news paper. It is great having a day off but I need to stock my fridge with food, to do this I need a job. I grab the black marker from the drawer in the living area where my laptop lives in the living room area. I pull the cap off the top with my teeth and resume to my forgotten  now cold poptart and place it on my lime green and brown plate and take a bite. I start circling the jobs that I think I would be good at and pay at least enough for the rent.

I am so engrossed in my search that I don't hear a knock at the door. So I jump out of my skin and scream when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

"Hey-its okay, it is just me" Nick reassures me, and hands me a hot chocolate from starbucks.

"Its not Grandma's Kitchen quality but I thought you might still like it."  Nick peeks over my shoulder and sees that I have highlighters and Sharpies strawn all over my small kitchen table. "What are you doing?" he asks me and see's the random things I am circling in the paper.

His eyes open wide when he sees that I circled exotic dancer to companion for dog. I sigh exhasperated "I need to find another job and their is just nothing that can help me afford this place."

Nick puts his arm around me "What about you move in with me, I am going to be away doing some shows, and no one is going to be there for the most part you will be alone, I will be there sometimes though." Nick asks hopefull.

I chuckle "Slow down Romeo, I am not moving in with you." We are not Dharma and Greg here.

Nick shakes his head "No seriously you would be doing me a favour, I will worry about you here with broken locks on your doors. He looks over and surveys the door. I need someone to watch my dogs anyways because Lauren doesn't live there anymore. We are going to Montreal in the next couple of weeks, also Goldie here gets lonely being couped up in here and she can play with my dogs. Really what could go wrong.?"

I stand up to be at Nicks eye level thank you very much for caring, you are very sweet but i'll figure something out." I take off my reading glasses and give him a kiss. It was only supposed to be a quick kiss, but it quickly turned into more as Nick picks me up and my legs wrap around his waist and sits me down on the small wooden kitchen island. His fingers running through my hair un-clipping my hair clip and letting my hair fall down my now bare back, some how my top has been sheded and is now on top of the blender.

He takes a moment to look at me "Your so beautiful Sophia." and bends down and kisses me so deep he excites me in ways, I am not even sure Lucas' ever did. Its like Nick knows all the right places to kiss, all the right things to say. I find myself getting completely lost in the moment and tug at nicks plain black T-shirt and watch as he exposes his muscular chest and tattoos. I bite my lip as I watch Nick bend down and starts to places kisses down my neck stopping at my chest and takes my right nipple into his mouth. I clumsily try to undo his belt as I feel a vibration in his pocket and hear a loud ringtone escaping the pocket of his jeans pocket.

This snaps me out of the moment "Mmmm I'll ignore it" His lips still firmly planted around my nipple. He manages to take the phone out of his pocket and silence it while still making my head spin from excitement.

"Where were we?" He asks his eyes now dark with desire. He starts to kiss me again and I speak in between kisses "We-are-supposed-to be taking this slow" I finally pull away from the kiss.

Nick pulls me in again "Nick, seriously- we need to take this slower, no matter how amazing it feels, and how you make me feel" I take a deep breath and place my forehead against his. I can hear both of our quickened heartbeats.

"I know-" Nick opens his eyes and looks at me "Sophia, you make me lose all sense of control." Nick says as we still have our foreheads against eachother.

I look at Goldie "I think she needs to go for a walk, I don't think this appartment is safe for us I say pulling away from Nicks intense eyes, hard body, Warm body heat and enticing smell.

Nick licks his lips and runs his hand through his hair "I think your right, I know this really great dog park. We can grab a frisbee on the way."

Nick unwraps his arms around me and grabs my shirt off of the blender and does up his belt buckle and zipper. He grins at me "You may want to put this on before we head out."

"Actually, do you mind If I shower im feeling very hot right now?" I say fanning myself.

"Only if I can join you." He says and starts to walk closer to me.

"Nuh-Unh Mr. Carter, not this time." I walk away " Besides, you need to see who called you it might be important."

"Yea, yea Sophia-" He stops mid sentence "I don't even know your last name." he says a little louder.

"I kept my maiden name its Sophia McCabe, I yell from the bathroom"

I smile as I hear Nick "Sophia McCabe I really like you, you know that." I turn the water on and smile and wonder if this day can get any better.