At ten o’clock Howie strolled in (he was on the late shift) looking every inch the businessman. I don’t think I ever saw the guy dressed less than perfect! Even on a Friday when we could wear casual clothes, he still managed to look smart, unlike the rest of us.

“Morning guys” he greeted us all. Howie was always in a good mood, I don’t know what his secret was.

“Morning Howie” we all called out, and then listened whilst he told us about his weekend at the beer festival. For a little guy, he could sure handle his beer and went to the beer festival every year to sample beers from around the world.

By ten thirty, the boss was on his way to the cafeteria for his coffee and now was my chance to prank call Alex. I waited until Kevin had left the room and then set my headset down and walked over to his desk.

“Nick…what are you up to?” Howie asked as he shook his head.

“Calling Alex. You know he has call minder and would recognise my desk phone number, so I’m calling him from Kevin’s” I grinned and picked up the phone.

Howie continued to shake his head, but Brian was nodding in encouragement. As if I needed any more encouragement!

The line rang a couple of times before it was answered.

“Hello” a croaky voice greeted me. I knew it was his ‘sick’ voice.

I had to stifle the giggle which was just dying to come out of my throat.

“Alex, this is Kevin” I said in my best Kevin voice “we need to talk about your adherence to your schedule, it’s becoming a problem and I’m not sure…”

He cut me off.

“Kevin” he croaked “I’m so sorry to let you down like this but I’ve got stomach flu man, I’ve been hugging the toilet all weekend”

“What is this…the fifth instance of sickness this year…I don’t think we can keep you on with a record like that” I said sternly, while all the time wanting to roll around laughing.

“Please Kevin, don’t fire me. I promise, it won’t happen again if you give me another chance. Please” he begged and at that, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I laughed out loud.

“Nick...is that you?” I could barely hear him for laughing “mother fucker”

“You should’ve heard you begging” I laughed

“Just you fucking wait Carter, payback’s coming” he said, his voice no longer that fake hoarse ‘sick’ voice, but back to normal.

“Bring it on, it’ll only make things more interesting around here” I told him. “So anyway dude, how come you’re not in today?”

“I went to that new club in town. Man, you should’ve been there! Wall to wall hotties! Anyway, I met this stunning girl and we spent the whole weekend together. I’m fucking knackered, if you know what I mean. I thought I was insatiable in the sack, but this girl, fuck me, she couldn’t get enough” he explained

“Lucky bastard. You seeing her again?” I asked. It was a well known fact that Alex had trouble with fidelity and didn’t usually see girls more than a couple of times.

“Damn right I am” he replied “she could be the one”

“Shit…dude, I’ve gotta go back to my desk, Kevin’s coming back and he’ll flip if he sees me at his desk”

Alex laughed “talk to you later, don’t work too hard”

“I’ll try not too” I laughed and we hung up. I got up from Kevin’s chair and began walking back to my desk.

“Who was that?” Kevin asked, setting his coffee down on his desk.

“Wrong number” I replied innocently.

I’m not sure he believed me, but nothing more was said on the matter. I went back to my desk, put my headset back on and got to work on another job.

“Some people shouldn’t be allowed near computers” Howie was shaking his head; he’d muted his phone so that his customer couldn’t hear him “got this woman on the phone who only needs a password reset. I’ve spelt it out to her like ten times, but she’s still not entering it right”

“Oh I hate those too” Brian agreed “remote onto her machine and do it for her, that’s what I do”

“Yeah, think I’ll have to or I’m gonna be here all day” Howie shrugged and took her off mute.

By one o’clock, I was more than ready for lunch.

“You ready Bri?” I asked as I locked my machine.

“Two minutes, just saving this call” Brian replied

“Where do you fancy going today?” I asked. We didn’t always go out at lunch time, but seeing as it was Monday, we needed something to pick us up.

“KFC?” Brian suggested

“Sounds good to me” I replied. Where our office building was located, we had a KFC, McDonalds, bakery, café, pub and a Pizza Hut just a short drive away.

“Your car or mine?” he asked

“It’s your turn” I reminded him.

“Anyone want anything?” Brian called to our colleagues, but they all shook their heads.

“Come on then, let’s go” I said. I was starving and needed some finger licking goodness!

“Don’t be late back” Kevin warned “you’ve both got a lot of calls in your queues that haven’t been dealt with yet”

He said that all the time. Did he think we were going to work through lunch? It wasn’t going to happen. No fucking way!

“I know he’s your cousin, but Kevin is a complete ass when he wants to be” I said as we swiped our ID cards to get out of the office.

“Don’t I know it!” Brian agreed. They may be cousins, but Brian received no special treatment from the boss, he was treated exactly the same as the rest of us.