The Truth Between The Lies

Copyright 2012

By Terri

Chapter 15

LILLY

You know what sucks about being the oldest in this family especially? EVERYTHING!  I felt so wretched but the comment Jade made about me hitting up AJ as well as the other two?  She was right.  I did things just because I could. I wasn’t proud my looks got me more in life but I didn’t abandon that fact either.  So why was I beating myself up you ask?  I guess it’s going to come out soon enough.

Lilly Of The Night?  It was a movie.  I don’t think I have to tell you what kind it was for the way Nick was leering at me at the breakfast table.  I needed money and I needed it fast. After the money started rolling in, I just did it for the pleasure.  Sex is my thing. It’s what I’m good at.   I prostituted myself to put myself and my sisters through college after Dad squandered all of our college funds away with his gambling. Mom tried but her heart wasn’t in it. It was somewhere else.  We were the only proof they loved each other at some point. At least until Aspen was born. Beyond that we really don’t know how they started coming apart. But back to me.  If I didn’t love my sisters so much I wouldn’t have started in the first place.  Some of the men I really enjoyed working with, the others; I just focused on something else while they made me their own personal fuck toy and pretended to enjoy it.   I know AJ may have been playing the concerned party in all of this but he was just as guilty as Nick where playing was concerned. The thought was there. They both knew who I was.  He didn’t get the chance thank God or I’d be in the doghouse with two of them. I’m not going to deny the fact that I enjoy sex.  I love it!  Maybe too much.  Maybe more than someone like Brian can handle.

The nicest guy in the world but he’s a freak when you get him horizontal.   Now if I could just learn to balance that.  What was I going to tell him? HOW was I going to face him?  I really liked him but even I knew the reality of it.  Once they found out, it was all about the sex. They wanted to fuck ALL night and day. I feared that maybe even he knew about it. So what?  It’s not like you’re gonna marry the guy. You’re just having a good time.  Deal with it when you have to. Go with the flow like you always do in these situations.  

“I’m really sorry about this weekend Red. It’s gotten way out of hand and it was supposed to be all about you,” I apologized as the elevator carried us down toward the lobby.

“It’s okay Lils. None of us could have seen this coming. Let’s just make the best of it okay?”

“So AJ?”

“Something we’ll talk about later okay?”

“But you are going to talk to him right?” Fuck! No wonder they hate me. Sometimes I act more like their mother than their sister.  And considering we didn’t have the most attentive one in the world, that’s not a compliment. I was as bad as she was in the sense that I didn’t have any self –respect where men were concerned. Hell, the last man I had any ties to fucked around on me with other MEN!  Doesn’t do wonders for the self-esteem. He was even my first real attempt at a ‘normal’ relationship as well. God did I screw up!

“When we get back to the shop I’m going to.”

“Good cuz I do still not understand how the hell he could forget you.”

“I know you’re trying to make me feel better but don’t okay?”

“Fine! I’ll just shut up the rest of this trip. It seems my mouth is the one thing that’s getting me into trouble anyway.”

“Lils come on!” Aspen protested just as the doors slid open.

Any other time I would have killed to have those eyes staring into mine but right now I was in no mood to play. From the looks of it, neither was he. He stepped onto the elevator and the silence was deafening all the way down to the lobby. Nobody was talking. Aspen was not one to air her problems in front of others. Wasn’t her style and I was better off if I didn’t say another word today.  The door slid open and he allowed us to exit first.  At least he was a gentleman in public (if nowhere else).

“Lilly.” God! How could his voice possibly send butterflies swirling in my stomach? We hadn’t even known each other 24 hours. There was no such thing as love at first sight. I didn’t believe in it so how could it exist?   Aspen gave me an ‘I don’t give a fuck what you do’ glares.

” Give me a minute?” I turned to him.

“Sure.”

“Aspen!” I called as she was nearly out the door.

“Leave me alone Lilly!”

“I’m sorry Red.  I really am. I just want you to be happy!”

“And I will be. You have to let go. Reese has already got him wrapped around her little finger.”

“And you will too Red. Believe that okay?”

“Okay. Go take care of what you need to and we’ll meet at the shop at one okay?”

“Okay.” I turned around and there he was. Right in my face. 

“We need to talk.”

“About?”

“About Nick.”

“Why?  I don’t like him.”

“That’s not what I hear.”

“Let me guess. He told you he got lucky on the way home from the airport right?”

“No, but Jade thinks he did.”

“Jade and I’ve cleared things up. “

“So clear it up with me.”

“Would you even believe me if I told you the truth?”

“I have no reason not to,” he said as he took my hand.  I’ve got to get this feeling under control.  There’s no way I’m falling in love with this guy. Not one little bit!

“Okay, we got a little hot and heavy but nothing beyond kissing happened. So you can send me away if you want. I’m big a girl.”

“I like you Lilly and I don’t want you to go. Come back to my room and we’ll talk.”

“You sure that’s all we’re gonna do?”

“That’s up to you but I wouldn’t say no.”

“I have to be back at Aspen’s by one.”

“Well we’d better get to going then. That only gives us a couple of hours.” He grinned.

Why did that thing go straight to the heart of my body?  Face it. You like him Lilly. Let down your guard. He led me to the elevator and wrapped his arms around my waist as we waited for the cart to arrive.  Once the doors slid open, he pulled me in toward the back.  Once the doors were closed, his mouth was on mine and his hands were all over me.  The flimsy lavender sweater was on the floor and he had backed me into the corner.

His body pressed into mine; my leg drawn up around his hip. His lips moving slowly down my neck. “Fuck Lilly! I can’t get enough of you.” 

He was working his way through the buttons on the gauzy flowing dress I was wearing when the bell on the elevator signaled the door opening.  False alarm. I reached down between us and started undoing his jeans.  He was so good last night and we were headed for a repeat performance.  His lips were on my neck and my hand was beneath his boxers. He didn’t care anymore than I did if we got caught or not. “God I can’t wait for you to fuck me like you did last night.”

His mouth had moved down to my bared breast when I heard another voice.  A familiar voice. One I didn’t want to hear at that very moment. “Rumor has it she’s even better with groups of men.  Mind if I join?”

Brian turned his head and I glared at Nick. Well that ended the party. Why did he have to be such a fucking prick and why was my little sister so in love with him?  Jade deserved better.

“Care to explain?” Brian pulled away from me and started pulling himself together.

“She didn’t tell you? Lilly was,” Shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe still is a porn star.  She fucked you in the back of the limo last night didn’t she?”

I glared at Brian.  I thought he was different.” C’mon Lilly.  I like you but let’s face it; you’re not the kind of girl a guy wants to take home to dear old mom.”

“You knew.  You fucking knew!”

“So what do you say Lils? Shall we have us a little party up in Brian’s room before the show?” Nick had kept me backed into the corner of the carriage.

“I gave that up a long time ago. You’re sick. Stay away from my little sister if you want to remain a functioning member of the male species.”

“You’re hot when you’re all fired up.”

“I dealt with arrogant pricks twice your size Nick. Don’t think I can’t take you down.”

“Leave her alone Nick.  It’s not worth it. We had our fun.  Time to move on,” Brian stated so coldly. Didn’t seem like the same guy she met the night before. 

Nick backed away and I buttoned my dress up.  I should have known better.  I’m damaged goods. What man would want me after what I’d done?