I awoke with a start, not having realized I’d even fallen asleep. “Ouch,” I said, sitting up straight. I’d been leaning my head against his bed from the chair at an uncomfortable angle.

I didn’t know what time it was but when I peeked out the window, it was getting light out.

She wakes up with the sun.

I glanced at him and smiled slightly. He knew me too well. I’d read the song so many times, I practically had it memorized already. I couldn’t wait to hear the melody. I didn’t know how long I was going to have to wait for that, though. AJ looked the same.

A nurse came in to check him out. She said what I’d just deducted. I was getting so sick of hearing “we’ll have to wait and see.” All of these machines in here, and nothing could give me any more information than that?

The morning passed by slowly.

“Hey,” Brian came in.

“No, no new news,” I responded before he could even ask.

He nodded. “August and I are running home for a few hours to get showers and something to eat. Do you want us to bring you anything?”

“I’m fine. Thanks though. I’ll call if anything happens. But at this rate, it won’t,” I said, glumly.

“Aw,” Brian ran over and gave me a big bear hug.

Only he could have been up all night in the hospital and have that kind of energy.

It was infectious, though, and I was grateful.

The room stayed quiet for awhile. I was getting bored sitting there, staring at him.

“AJ Mclean, I swear- if you don’t wake up I’m going to kill you,” I threatened, too tired to cry anymore, too cranky to be nice about it.

One of the monitors started beeping differently, just for a few seconds. I glanced around, but everything was back to normal. And AJ was still motionless. But I could’ve sworn it had sounded like…

A laugh.

I was losing it, wasn’t I? I had to meet with the police again today, concerning the incident last night. If I didn’t start thinking clearer, they were going to believe I was crazy.

Nevertheless, the idea had been comforting. I took his hand. “The longer you make me wait, the more likely I am to replace the black nail polish,” I said, examining it.

I waited, hoping for a change. Of course, nothing happened.

I kept talking, anyway, sick of the silence. “You’d look sexy with a nice shade of pink.”

I laughed at myself, picturing what he would look like if I did that.

Still nothing.

I wondered again if I’d ever get the chance to reciprocate. To tell him how I felt. He’d had to mean it, right? It wasn’t just “well, I’m probably about to die, so what the heck?”

No, it was sincere. It had to be. Besides, it was past time to stop second guessing everything. And with that resolve, though he couldn’t hear me, I blurted it out.

“I love you, too.”

I stared at him, pretending he was just sleeping. If you ignored the hospital background, he did still look peaceful. My tattooed guardian angel.

He made a noise.

My heart stopped as I waited. It had been faint, and over almost before it had begun, but I’d heard it.

“AJ? Come on, AJ,” I coaxed. “Just give me a sign that you can hear me, okay?”

His face twitched, but he didn’t seem to have the strength to open his eyes. But he squeezed my hand.

I ran to get a doctor. As he returned to check on AJ, I went back to the waiting room. Nick, Howie, and Dianna were in there.

“I think he’s waking up!” I told them.

“Seriously?” Nick smiled. “That’s good! So he’ll be okay?”

“We’ll know shortly.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

That afternoon, I stood by his bedside. Brian and August had come back just as the others were leaving. I hadn’t gotten a chance to speak to him alone yet.

“Way to scare the crap out of us, man,” Brian said.

“You know,” AJ shrugged weakly. “I like to be different.”

Brian rolled his eyes and started to speak again, but August wrapped her arm around his and gave him a significant look. He caught on quickly.

“Alright, man. I… gotta go,” he sang. “Try to dodge the bullets, literally, while we’re gone, okay?”

AJ and Brian laughed. I cringed. I exchanged a look with August. She hadn’t found it funny, either.

Boys, I thought.

“Yeah, I’ll try,” AJ promised.

When they left, I sat next to AJ awkwardly.

“So… what happened?”

“We told you already.”

“No, I mean, specifically. How’d you take care of Peter? After I was, you know, useless and shot.”

“Useless? AJ, you can’t be serious. You saved my life!”

“I know, but I wish I’d been more help.”

I smiled at his earnest face. “Only you would risk your life to save mine and then not think it was enough. Anyway, I’m trying to tell you that you did save me,” I said significantly, a smile spreading across my face.

“What do you mean?”

I pulled something out of my bag. “Peter was about to… shoot again. He knocked me down.”

I saw the protective look cross AJ’s face.

“I poked his eye to distract him so that I could use the gun to knock him out,” I said, setting something in AJ’s lap. “You saved me,” I said again.

AJ looked at his action figure and smiled. I remembered that I’d been holding it when Peter showed up and must’ve dropped it outside my apartment. That’s how AJ had found us.

AJ flashed his trademark smile. “I told you I was a superhero.”

I made sure to roll my eyes. “Pretty lame pick-up line. You expect me to fall for that?” I joked.

“You know what I do remember?”

“What’s that?”

“You yelling at me.”

“You were lying on the ground bleeding. I was… pissed off!” I laughed, so happy to be talking with him. To know that he was going to be okay.

“Way to be grateful,” he said, sarcastically, taking my hand.

“Uh-huh. I guess you don’t remember today. Right as you were waking up?”

AJ thought a moment, but shook his head.

“I was talking to you.”

“What’d you say?”

“I love you, too.”

“Too? Wait, did I say that to you?” he looked astonished.

I stared at him, mouth open. So it had been one of those things you just say when you think it’s the end? He didn’t even remember. Now what was I supposed to say? My heart started racing, looking at the expression on his face. I didn’t suppose there was any chance I could get him to forget this conversation?

“Ha! Just kidding,” AJ laughed as if it were the funniest thing in the world.

I started breathing again. “I am going to smother you with that pillow!”

“You know you love me,” he said with that air of cockiness I was always quick to snap back at. “In fact, you just admitted it.”

“I think I like him better than you,” I said, holding up the action figure. I gave AJ- the real AJ- a hug, anyway. “My hero.”

Then I pretended to smother him with that pillow.