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Author's Chapter Notes:
Added 8/13. I said that y'all wouldn't have to wait long for the next chapter and here it is! Are you ready to find out Gumby's gender...? Happy reading!

Also, now this is the longest chapter and yes, I felt that all of the things that happen in this chapter need to be told in one and not be split into two chapters especially since I said that the baby's gender would be revealed in this one. lol

Tuesday, July 22, 2008
6:10 PM

"I can't do this, John, not today," AJ stated and stood up from his chair that was across from his psychiatrist. 

"Alex, please...we can talk about this," he pleaded, knowing where this was headed. 

"Don't you get it? I don't want to talk about anything. You're lucky that I even showed up. Why can't everyone just leave me alone??" AJ asked in exasperation and turned to leave Dr. Stehlik's office. 

"Alex, wait—" Too late. AJ walked out the door, slamming it closed. 

In a huff, AJ stormed out of the building and went to his Porsche. He unlocked it and practically ripped the door open. He got in and shut the door, just sitting there. It had been years since he had stormed out of a therapy session with John. The last time occurred in late 2001 when AJ was dealing with his grandmother Ursula's death after the Black & Blue Tour. He was at the anger stage of grief; he'd felt that way for quite some time. He got sick of the questions and talking about her, so, he stormed out on John and sat on the curb outside and bawled until he had no tears left to cry. AJ didn't realize that John had followed him until he placed a comforting hand on his shoulder and eventually, the two of them went back inside to finish the session. 

AJ looked to his left and could almost visualize his twenty-three year-old self sitting on the curb in front of him. Now, he felt like he was back at square one; angry. But more than that, he felt...broken. What AJ wanted to tell John before he left was that he wasn't sick or broken, that he didn't need to be cured or fixed. But maybe he was wrong. Maybe he had it all wrong. He was definitely feeling wrong; if there was such a time to feel happy, it was now. He and the Boys were embarking on a North American tour next week for their Unbreakable album, he had a strong, healthy, and bright four year-old son and a beautiful, loving wife that was pregnant with their second child. What more could he ask for? 

AJ snapped his head up in attention, surprised that Dr. Stehlik was opening his Porsche's passenger side door and getting in. He was even more surprised that he didn't stop him. 

"I thought I'd find you in here. Either that, or on the curb," he said gently, hinting at the memory of AJ on the pavement outside all those years ago. 

AJ chuckled. "Yeah." He glanced at that spot once more and quickly looked down at the steering wheel in front of him. He sighed. "What do you want, John?"

"I'm just making sure you're okay. You've gotta get quite upset to storm out like that," Dr. Stehlik said. 

"I wish everyone would stop saying that," AJ sighed again. 

"Do they have reason to?" he wondered, trying to get AJ to open up and say what he was thinking. 

"That's not the point," AJ grumbled low. "They need to stop worrying, I'm fine. I'm functioning."

"'Functioning?'" John repeated, puzzled by AJ's choice of words. "So, there is something there for others to be concerned about?"

He avoided his question. "Just leave it alone, John."

He frowned a little. "It's my job to ask these questions, Alex, or have you forgotten why you come to see me?"

AJ rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

"Alex...what is it? What is it that you're trying not to say?"

"Nothing!" AJ exclaimed. "I-I...I mean—don't take this the wrong way, but I don't think you're the one I should be talking to right now."

John understood and nodded. "Kim?"

AJ sighed. "Yeah."

"Well, I'll let you get to that, then. Remember, I'm only a phone call away. Day or night." He smiled a little and put his hand on AJ's right shoulder. "You'll get through this, Alex. I promise you that. You've been to Hell and back; you can overcome anything. You can do this."

"Thanks, John." AJ said and returned the smile. 

"Alright. Be good and drive safe. Give me a call next week before you leave for Canada."

"Haha, I always am and I will." They shook hands and Dr. Stehlik left the car and went back inside. 

AJ started the engine and left the parking lot and cruised for a few minutes before stopping at Starbucks for his usual and something for Kim to take home to her before continuing the drive home. 

6:44 PM 

Kim heard the front door open and was surprised to see AJ come inside the house. "You're home early. Is everything alright?" she wondered from the couch as he walked into the living room carrying what she recognized as two Starbucks cups. 

"Everything's fine." He bent down and kissed her cheek. "For you." He gave her the white cup. "Tall hot chocolate with whipped cream." He took a seat next to her. 

Kim was satisfied with his answer for now, but knew that something was up. "Aw, thank you baby." She took a small sip of the warm beverage. 

"You know I had to get you a little somethin' somethin'." He nudged her arm playfully. "You don't even have to ask."

"And I appreciate it."

"And I know how you love your chocolate," he added. 

Kim nodded. "Yes, I do."

"J's upstairs?"


AJ took a drink of his white chocolate mocha frappuccino and glanced at the show that was on. "Cool. Is there anything good on TV?"

Kim shrugged. "Not really." She turned it off and set the remote on the coffee table, relaxing against the cushions. She moved closer to AJ. "This is nice." 

AJ smiled. "It is." He heard a noise from upstairs and saw Jordan run down the stairs. 

"Daddy, you're home!" He ran over to him and hopped up on the couch and hugged him. 

AJ put his free arm around Jordan and gave him a squeeze. "I missed you, too, bud." He looked over at Kim who was smiling at them.

There really was no place like home.

7:52 PM

The three of them continued to lounge around in the living room watching TV. These were times that AJ cherished more than anything, just being together with his family with no plans, not needing to be somewhere or having to stick to a schedule. He now understood why Brian loved being a father to Baylee, it really was the best job in the world. 

"Mommy?" Jordan asked and looked up at her. She was holding him close to her.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"How come I only have one grandma and grandpa? Where are your mommy and daddy?"

Now, to a curious four year-old these were perfectly acceptable questions to ask, but Kim was not prepared for that at all. She swallowed hard to keep a lump from forming in her throat.

AJ could see the sort of stressed expression on her face and decided to step in, knowing how sensitive Kim was when it came to talking about the deaths of both of her parents. "Jordan, it's time for bed. Come on—"

Kim stopped him. "No, Alex, it's okay. I'll answer it."

AJ was surprised. "Are you sure?" he asked her gently. 

She let out a sigh. "Yeah." She turned to face Jordan. "Jordan, the truth is that...my mommy and daddy are dead."

Jordan frowned. "They are?"


"How did they die?" he wondered softly. 

Kim tried her best to explain it in a way that he would understand. "Well...my mommy, your grandma, Celia, was in a car accident when I was much older than you are now. Kinda like how you and Grandma got hurt. I was seventeen."

"Was she hurt bad?"

Kim nodded. "Yes, she was. She was taken to a hospital and the doctors tried everything they could to make her better, but...she died."

"Oh," Jordan said sadly. "I'm sorry, Mommy. I don't wanna make you sad." He could see that she was near tears and sat up to kiss her cheek. 

"Thank you, sweetie." She sniffled. "Do you wanna hear about your grandpa?"


AJ knew how hard this was for Kim, but he also couldn't feel more proud of her. He took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

She cleared her throat. "After me and Daddy got married, your grandpa David got very sick with something called cancer. He...fought very hard to get better for a long time, but he died a few months after you were born. He loved you very much, you were his nietecito ("little grandson" in Spanish), his first grandchild.  Do you wanna see a picture of them?"

He nodded. 

"Alex, go get the picture of dad and Jordan and the photo album from off of our dresser, will you, please?" 

"Sure." AJ kissed Kim's cheek. "Be right back." He went upstairs to their bedroom.  

"Do you miss them a lot, Mommy?"

Kim nodded. "Yeah...I do. They would've loved watching you grow, your grandpa spent every moment he could with you." She smiled down at him. "I love you, do you know that?"

"Love you, too, Mommy." 

She kissed his hair. "We need to cut your hair, you shaggy dog." He was sort of sporting a small afro with his curly dark brown locks. 

Jordan shook his head just like Bernie would if it was wet. "But I like it, Mommy."

Kim laughed. "You're just like Baylee, he doesn't want his hair cut, either."  

AJ stood there at the foot of the stairs with photo album in hand watching Kim and Jordan's little exchange and smiled. He walked back into the living room, took a picture off of the shelf next to the TV, handed it to Kim, and sat back down on the couch next to Jordan. 

Kim showed Jordan the picture in the frame first. She pointed to her father's smiling face. "That's your grandpa, David, and that baby he's holding is you." It was his first time holding Jordan a few hours after he was born.  

Jordan's eyes went wide and he looked at AJ. "That's me?"

AJ chuckled. "Yep, that's you. You were a little pipsqueak and you still are." He tickled Jordan's side and he fell back against him, giggling.    

Kim began turning pages of the brown photo album she held in her hands. She stopped when she found the picture she was looking for. "Here it is," she said quietly.  

Jordan and AJ looked over to see a picture of Kim's family from Christmas 1997 according to the tiny orange numbers in the bottom right corner, it was their last 'whole' family photo before Kim's mother's sudden death in January 1998. Standing behind their living room couch was her mom and dad; Kim was sitting in between her two older brothers Mateo (Matthew) and Andrés (Andrew). The family of five was all smiles, even Kim with her mouth full of braces.

Jordan pointed a finger at Kim's mother. "She's pretty, Mommy."

"She was." Kim nodded, staring at the picture and AJ couldn't quite tell if she was thinking of the good or bad memories that it represented. After her father's death in June 2004, Kim's once happy family crumbled for good. She rarely spoke to her two brothers and stopped contact with all of her other relatives. AJ knew one thing, that Kim was one million miles away in thought. 

Jordan yawned and AJ heard it. "Alright, sleepyhead, it's time for bed. To bed, I said!" He looked at Kim. "I've got it tonight, baby," he said softly. 

"Goodnight, Mommy, love you." Jordan hugged and kissed her.

"And I love you." She ran a hand through his hair. "I'll see you in the morning, okay?"

Jordan nodded and AJ scooped him up from the couch and carried him upstairs to bed. He came back down about ten minutes later to find Kim still looking at the picture of her family in the brown photo album. 

She looked up and AJ sank down next to her. "Did he go down okay?"

"Out like a light after five minutes." He smiled a little, but his expression changed quickly as Kim set the photo album aside and buried her face in his chest, sobbing uncontrollably. He put his arms around her and just let her cry, rubbing her back in a comforting manner. "It's okay, baby. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I promise." He kissed her hair and they stayed like that for awhile before Kim sat up, wiping her eyes and nose with a tissue. She lay her head against his chest, listening to his heart beat. "Why does everything have to be so screwed up?"

AJ sighed. "I don't know, baby. If I knew the answer to that, I would surely tell you." He paused and just held her close. "I can't imagine how much you're hurting right now over your parents and your family. Maybe you should call Matt and Andrew, it's never too late to fix things. I'm sure they miss you, too."

"Speak for yourself," she grumbled. 

AJ sighed again, knowing that Kim hinted at his nonexistent relationship with his biological father, Bob. "That's not the same thing, he never wanted me, Kim. You had a family."

"Yeah? Well, when Mom died, that whole side of the family died along with her. Same with Dad..." 

AJ decided to drop the subject for now and the two of them were quiet again until he got an idea. "I know what might make you feel better, I'll be right back." 

Kim noticed that he went past the stairs and into the kitchen. When he came back to the living room he was carrying one of his acoustic guitars, he must have gone downstairs and into his studio to get it.

AJ sat back down on the couch and began to tune it, strumming chords to make sure that it sounded good. "Will you sing with me?" He began to strum a chord rhythmically and he saw Kim's eyes light up as she recognized the intro to Lifehouse's "You and Me." It was one of her all-time favorite songs that she wished AJ would have written, he certainly had the talent for it.

AJ saw her reaction and nodded. "On the second chorus, okay?"

Kim nodded back and he began to sing to her after he repeated the intro a second time:

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

AJ and Kim's voices blended together as she joined him on the chorus and the others after that. She wasn't the most amazing singer, but her voice was music to his ears.

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

AJ let the last chord ring out until it faded and rested the guitar on his knee.

"Thank you, baby, you know I love that song," Kim said and leaned over to kiss him. 

"Mm, that was nice." AJ set his guitar down and cupped her face gently with his hands and kissed her again. He grinned and looked right in her eyes. "I love you, Kim. I don't know who I would be without you. You're everything to me."

"I love you, Alex."  

They kissed again and AJ held her in his arms, their hands placed on Kim's baby bump. They were quiet until Kim was startled and looked up at him. "Alex, did you feel that? The baby kicked."

"He did?"


AJ chuckled. "It's just a feeling."

"Our baby kicked, it's really in there." Kim looked down to her growing belly. "You, my little futbolista are going to kicking around pelotas in no time."

"He's going to be doing what, now?" AJ didn't know much Spanish, but he loved that Kim was bilingual and talked to the baby that way.  

Kim laughed. "I said that our little soccer player, here, is going to be kicking balls around in no time."


The two of them stayed quiet for awhile and eventually AJ's mind drifted off to earlier with John when he said he was going to talk to Kim about what was bothering him. But he just couldn't ruin this moment, it would have to wait. 

Friday, July 25, 2008
1:22 PM

"Kim? Alex? You can come on back," Dr. Novotny called to them as they sat in the waiting room. She ushered them in before her and the three of them entered an exam room and sat down.

"How are you guys? No Jordan today, I see?"

AJ spoke first. "I'm doing alright, Liz. Yeah, he's at my mom's for a day of spoiling."

"Ooh, lucky him. And you, Kim?"

"I'm okay," she answered. 

"Just 'okay?'"

"My back is starting to get sore," Kim added. 

"Ah, that's a bummer. It's about that time, though."


"I really appreciate you moving this appointment up a week, Liz. You know that I'd absolutely hate to miss anything," AJ said. 

"Oh, it's no problem at all. I normally wouldn't because keeping pre-natal appointments on a consistent schedule is important, but I figured that I could make an exception under the circumstances." 

AJ and the Boys had to go back on the road that coming Monday for the US and Canada leg of the tour. This appointment was a win-win for AJ because he wouldn't miss anything going on with the baby and Kim and Jordan could come on tour with him immediately. "I promise that I will fly out here for the other appointments if necessary, every single one. No more date-swapping." 

"Good. Now, Kim, I want you to come in August 22nd—"

"Howie's birthday," AJ chirped.

Dr. Novotny just rolled her eyes and continued. "For a monthly follow-up and then your regularly scheduled one for the 29th, so, that we're back on track."

"Sounds good," Kim agreed.      

"Alright, Kim, let's get you up on the scale."

"I feel like I'm on The Biggest Loser," Kim said with a laugh.

"No, that'd be me," AJ corrected her with a smirk.

"Oh, stop." She hit him playfully on the arm. 

"Hey! What was that for?"

"Must be the hormones," she replied with a shrug as Dr. Novotny moved the marker for the correct result.  

AJ wiggled his eyebrows. "Someone likes it rough..."

"You know it."

"Get a room, will ya? Jeez," Liz exclaimed and rolled her eyes again.  

"The door's right there," AJ reminded her and glanced at it. 

Like she was gonna fall for that. "Hahaha. As much as I would love to leave you two alone in here so that you could go at it like rabbits, I believe that Kim is already pregnant. Or is that not why we're here?"

"Oh, darn, you caught me," he said in mock disappointment.  

"Anyway," Liz turned her attention back to Kim, "Another four pounds, that's good."

"Can't keep her out of the fridge," AJ quipped. 

"Hey, I'm eating for two, you know! What's your excuse?" Kim asked as she hopped up on the exam table. Dr. Novotny walked over to the counter next to the scale and snapped on a pair of rubber gloves. 

"I'm a growing boy," he answered with a grin and patted his stomach. 

"Stupid boy is more like it," Liz smirked and wrapped a blood pressure cuff around Kim's upper left arm.

AJ huffed and pouted. Kim laughed.    
"Alright, your BP's normal. 115/85. Temp's next." Dr. Novotny placed a thermometer in her ear and read the result after it beeped. "Normal, 98.8. How are you feeling?"

"Well, like I said, my back has started to ache and I've had quite an appetite lately," Kim replied.  

"That's good, now that you're past the morning sickness. Just make sure that you're snacking on the healthy stuff and not the Ben & Jerry's," she advised her with a light smile. 

"But all's fair in moderation, right?"

Liz nodded. "Of course."

"My abdomen's been kinda sore, too. I think it's just the baby growing."

"It's probably round ligament pain. The ligaments that support your uterus are stretching to accommodate its increasing weight. It's normal," Dr. Novotny explained nonchalantly. "Unless it persists or gets worse when you're resting," she added.

"Right. My boobs are getting bigger and are sort of tender, too—"

"I've definitely noticed that," AJ announced loudly. 

"Of course you have," Liz droned with a shake of her head. "Men."

"Women," AJ mimicked in the same tone and relaxed in his chair.

"Yep, that's happening, too. Your hormones are preparing for lactation. You're going through a lot of changes right now," she continued and handed Kim a plastic specimen cup. "I'll need a urine sample to check your hormone levels and such. At your next regularly scheduled visit on the 29th, you'll be 24 weeks along and it'll be time to test for gestational diabetes."  

"I'll have to drink that sugar water again?" Kim groaned. 

Dr. Novotny chuckled. "Yes."

She shuddered. "That stuff was nasty; it didn't taste like cola at all."

AJ laughed. 

"You try it when I do and see how you like it." 

"Fine," he smirked back. 

"Alright, youtwo. Go do your thing, Kim, and I'll send it to the lab."

After Dr. Novotny received Kim's normal lab results and reviewed them with her and AJ, it was time for her to ask one of the most important questions of the visit.

She grinned. "So...are you guys ready to see your baby?"

Kim was overjoyed. "An ultrasound? Today? Really?"

Liz chuckled at her excitement. "Yes, it's time to check the baby's length and limbs to make sure that it's growing properly. And you can find out the sex, if you so wish."

"Great, let's get started!"

"What's this? No comments from the peanut gallery? I'm shocked, Alex."

AJ stood at went to Kim's side. "I'm excited, too." He gave her a squeeze. 

Soon enough, the portable ultrasound machine was wheeled into the exam room and the procedure began. Kim and AJ both teared up a little as they saw their baby for the first time. Dr. Novotny and an ultrasound technician named Elise began to record the baby's measurements and checked for limb abnormalities. So far, everything was perfect or within an acceptable range.

Once Elise's services were no longer needed, they all thanked her and she left the room. It was time for the moment they had been waiting almost five months for: whether they were going to have a new little AJ or Kim by Christmas.

"Are you guys ready?" Liz asked them with a smile. 

Kim gripped AJ's hand tighter. "Yes." 

AJ nodded. "Go for it."

Dr. Novotny began to move the wand around on Kim's gel-covered stomach to find the baby. "There it is." Its little heart was a bluish red blob that was moving. She moved the wand a bit to get the clearest picture possible. 

AJ was looking, too, along with Kim, squinting. He gasped lightly. "Is that a...?"

Liz nodded with a grin. "It's a boy." 

"Oh, Alex..." Kim whispered as a tear streamed down her face. "We're having another son."

AJ's eyes were brimming with tears. He wiped hers gently with his thumb and bent down to kiss her. "Don't get me started, now." He kissed her again. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

They continued to hold hands as Dr. Novotny cleaned Kim up and she printed out a picture of the baby for them to keep. They went over a few more things since Kim was going to be joining AJ and the Boys on tour that coming Monday, like diet, using rest stops often to stretch and prevent blood clots from forming in her legs, sleep habits, and guidelines for fevers and what medications were safe for her to take if absolutely necessary. 

After a few congratulatory wishes and hugs, AJ and Kim left the doctor's office and went to a local restaurant for a late lunch. On the way there, they ordered a specialty cake from Whole Foods to take to Denise and Tony's house as a way to tell them the gender of their second grandchild. Both of them agreed that they should be among the first to know, along with Jordan and the other Boys.

Eventually, AJ parked and they made their way inside. They enjoyed a quiet, relaxing meal, just the two of them enjoying each other's company. Afterward, they had to stop at Whole Foods to pick up the cake they ordered and continued to drive to Denise's and Tony's home to surprise them and Jordan with it.  

"So..." Kim sighed as AJ drove through LA traffic.  

"So," AJ repeated with a laugh. "Mom and Tony are gonna be ecstatic, I think Tony said it was a boy all along."

Kim agreed with him. "Yeah, I can't wait for them to find out. They'll be so happy."

"You know, maybe you should—"

"Alex, don't. Not now." She pulled her hand from his grasp, knowing that he was going to ask her to tell her brothers the news. They didn't even know that she was pregnant; she hadn't spoken to either of them since Christmas. 

"Sorry, I just thought that..." AJ sort of sulked a little.

"Maybe," Kim said and turned to stare out the window. 

'Well, it's a start,' AJ thought, hopeful.

Around fifteen minutes later, they were standing at AJ's parents' front door and were quickly let inside by Tony. "What's with the cake?" he wondered, seeing the dessert being held by AJ.

"You'll see..." he smirked. 

"Bring it in the kitchen, your mom and Jordan are in there." 

Tony and Kim followed AJ into the kitchen where he placed the cake on the island where Denise and Jordan were eating a couple of sandwiches and chips. 

"Mommy! Daddy!"

"Hey, what're you two doing back so early?"

"We have something to celebrate and it wouldn't be right if all of my family didn't participate," Kim said and bent down to hug Denise. 

"Well, what is it?" She took a good look at the cake. It was the right size for the five of them to share. It appeared to be white buttercream frosting decorated with blue and pink sprinkles and swirls of icing. It said "Congratulations!" with each letter alternating in blue and pink as well. "You didn't..."

AJ nodded with a grin. 

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's cut it!" Tony said. 

"Yeah!" Jordan agreed and hopped off of his stool and stood next to AJ. "Can I help, Daddy?" 

"Sure, buddy." He took the plastic top off of the cake container and grabbed a knife and serving spatula from a drawer. He sat Jordan down on the stool in front of the cake both of them grasped the knife. With two smooth strokes, they cut a wedge in the cake and AJ used the spatula to lift up the piece. The cake under the frosting was blue with two layers and some more buttercream in the middle. 

Jordan gasped loudly and his eyes were as wide as saucers. "Blue! A boy!"

A round of hugs and tears commenced as they served up the cake. AJ took a picture of a slice of the cake with his BlackBerry and sent it to the other Boys, Chris, Jeff, and his Uncle Bill with the caption "2 for 2!"

AJ never thought that he would want the family name his sperm donor of a father had left him to be carried on, but when he looked at Jordan, that's all he wanted for him: that he would be able to have children of his own some day. 

That was a long time from now and as of this moment, everything was perfect. What more could he ask for?
Chapter End Notes:
So there you have it, AJ hasn't broken the streak of boy Backstreet babies (yet)! :D To be honest, I'd planned on Gumby being a boy all along and hope that I didn't disappoint too many of you. ;)

I plan on starting the next chapter after I post this or tomorrow. Another update will be coming soon, don't forget to leave me some feedback! :D

And I put that Lifehouse song in this chapter 'cause I'm kinda obsessed with it at the moment. lol