Lookin' back on the things I've done
I was tryin' to be someone
I played my part, kept you in the dark
Now let me show you the shape of my heart

As the group sang the chorus live at the Orlando arena in their jersies. AJ kept thinking what lead to that night, and 2001 when he missed the show in Boston, MA and upset Rochelle again. The TRL NEWS BREAK that changed his life and a girl in a small town America.

May 8th, 2001

It was a normal day at her school, it was about 12:15pm in the afternoon, AJ had come into the school and was signing autographs looking for his friend all over the school. Lockdowns hadn't been initaited in the small town yet. He was hopeing she would go with him to Mexico and he could drown his troubles, have sex, and get high like he dreamed as a young teen ten years ago.

"Hi, ladies." AJ said. "It's so cool, look at all the pretty circles and squares." He told a cheerleader girl. "Ewwwww, she is dating him online." She told her friend as they walked to their english class for the 2nd half of their school day.

Then "824" walked up to him. Dark blonde hair, blue eyes, small hands, big nose, petite, dolphin laugh. Everyone else walked to class. AJ was totally out of it clearly. "AJ, you ok?" She asked. "Yes, I am." AJ said. "Howie beat me up for missing a show in Boston and making us look unprofessional to NKOTB." He told her. "Who?" She asked.

"New Kids on the Block, you know?" He replied. She grabbed his hand and took him to outside of the science class room. "AJ, you can't be here, I have chemisty class." She told him. "I can show you some chemisty in the hotel room." He said. "Why don't you love me?" He asked.

"I do love you." She replied. "No you don't. Or else you would have drove to the airport and meet me in Mexico." AJ replied back. "AJ, I don't have a license yet, I still get too nervous making split decisions like that." She replied. He finally began to cry. "No one loves! NO ONE LOVES! NO ONE LOVES ME!" He shouted and began wheeping. She hugged him tight.

"Calm down, Alex, it's ok." She told him, the 16 year old told him. All dressed in a cute white t-shirt and tight sliver and rhinestoned studded and lace up jeans. "Does God even love me?" AJ asked. "Yes, he does." She told him.

"But your a witch." AJ cried. "I know, maybe someday you'll help me like I helped you." She replied. "But God doesn't love me, Howie had to beat me up, since I tried to hold him down on the coach in the recording studio so he would understand me." AJ kept crying. She could see he had a bruised chin, bruised right cheek, bleeding nose from too much drugs and the fight, and 2 black eyes under his sunglasses and his eyes shone sadly through the dark black sunglasses.

"Fine, if there is a God, then when you save me someday, we'll be friends, BFFE friends." She told him. "Like you and Howie are, and Nick are." She told him. He agree to it. "He kept crying, but God doesn't love me and I don't know how to get my girlfriends back, and my friends, and my family." he began crying tons and tons.

"Can I have a black marker for a minute. It will help you." She told him. "But I want to make it with three girls." AJ said, that gave her an idea to hypnotize him into thinking he had been with them. First she drew a cross on his arm, and a small heart with wings, and "Winner" on his back and on his forehead. "Now wear your hat, go to the airport and go to Promises rehab like Howie told you too." She told him.

Then hypnotized him into thinking the drawings on his arms were women he was with and she drew an angel on his card and on his arm for him. Then kissed him and gave him hugs. Not realizing the students were watching them from the science room in the empty hallway by the stairs. "Now get rid of those 2 drug dealers you brought here and call a cab to meet outside of the end of the neighborhoods by here ok?" She asked him. Then hugged him. "Fine, I'll make a truce with the guys and I, until your better." She told him.

Then after 20 minute lockdown after AJ and the 2 dealers left the property and his cab for the airport cam. She e-mailed Howie as soon as she got home. Then TRL came on at 4pm on the dot. "Guys, I am sorry, the Backstreet Boys have an announcement today." Carson Daly told the camera in the blue and starry studio in Times Square in NYC, NY.

The Backstreet Boys all sat there sadly. "We hate to announce this. But we couldn't find AJ at the show in Boston, MA or to the next venue. So AJ and us decided it would be best for him to go to Rehab." Kevin told the speechless girls in the crowd as people's jaws dropped and they began to cry.  One or two even screamed, Nick and Brian seemed so sad, words couldn't describe it.

"It was decided by us, fans, friends, and even some enemies of the groups." Howie said. "He will be in Promises rehab in California, he was at someone's high school earlier today, and we'll check in on him. But no more "Black and Blue" tour shows, I am sorry." Howie said sadly with his head hung uncharacteristicly low out of saddness for his co-worker and friend.

Rochelle began to cry. Then called AJ's cell phone to check on him.